Latest Stories
Most recently published stories in Psyche.
You Have A Choice
Stripping down for the cold so I don’t get tense and start shivering; I tremble when I don’t let it take me. I’ve made dinner plans with Hostility disguised as stoicism and Loneliness disguised as independence and Fear, not even bothering to disguise herself at all. Fear always reclines and puts her feet up on the table when I have her over for dinner.
By Gabrielle S.5 years ago in Psyche
It's Mental Illness Innit?
I wasn't diagnosed with depression and anxiety until my 20s but the earliest I remember experiencing anxiety is in my earliest memories; five, six maybe. Depression, the cunning bitch, didn't show up in earnest until late elementary.
By Christine Hollermann5 years ago in Psyche
Living on the fucking border(line).
Now I am not talking about upstate New York. Or down south in El Paso, Texas. I am talking about a personality disorder so confusing, even the title leaves many people confused. Borderline. Teetering on the edge of something. Almost there. Well yes, but in actuality, quite the opposite. The term “borderline” was first introduced in the United States in 1938. It was a term used by early psychiatrists to describe people who were thought to have a tendency to regress into “borderline schizophrenia” in certain situations. At the time, people with neurosis were believed to be treatable, whereas people with psychoses were deemed untreatable. These patients were especially confusing. They didn’t quite fit into the the category of neurotic personality. Or psychotic. Ultimately, where these patients inhabited is somewhere in purgatory – no man’s land if you will. Somewhere on the borderline between neurosis and psychosis.
By Christina K. Pierce5 years ago in Psyche
On The Road To Anxiety Recovery.
Copyright © 2021 by Nicola Marie Rattley. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.
By Nicola Rattley5 years ago in Psyche
Seven Drug-Free Anxiety Solutions
Before jumping into this information, I should give a little background on who I am and how I came to find these drug-free ways to deal with my most significant problems. I have joined the U.S military in 2004 and immediately spent 15 months in the Guantanamo detention facility. While there, I was a guard where every day for those fifteen months, I endured one or all of these treatments: spat on, screamed at, and having urine and fecal matter thrown at me every day. After that, I spent most of my life living in Afghanistan's villages, freeing them from the Taliban. We were attacked every day multiple times a day and, in many cases, were so outnumbered we were unable to fight them off. We did get to free hundreds of villagers and bring home many people to their families that were forced into slavery. But these were very bloody victories, and unfortunately, they tend to return to me often.
By Michael Martinez5 years ago in Psyche
Safe Haven
My safe place otherwise known as my cozy corner started out as a corner in an old run down part of my former homes carport. I was in my early 30’s, a young mom of 2 young children and I had just had my entire world as I’d known it flipped completely upside down. I’d caught a flu like many people do except this was different, much different. I had never regained my energy. After years of an exhausting fight with numerous doctors I had gotten answers. Words I will never forget...NARCOLEPSY, REM BEHAVIOR SLEEP DISORDER AND SEVERE PLMD known as periodic limb movement disorder. It sounded like a foreign language. Yet this was reality, somehow my reality. As the shock slowly faded and the fog began to lift I heard NO CURE BUT YOU CAN LIVE A SOMEWHAT NORMAL LIFE WITH MEDICATION AND LIFE CHANGES. I just stared at the dr waiting on the punchline but none came. It was a very bittersweet day for me. I had finally gotten answers other than,”you’re depressed which is causing the severe fatigue” but I did not expect this. Now I had to process. It was definitely a lot to process. When I got home that day I needed space. To think, to reflect, to unpack everything I was feeling so I cleaned out a little area which would become my first ‘cave’ better known as CraftyGirlz that I eventually started a site on Facebook with showing my newfound creative side. This became my saving grace so when I bought my home a year ago a special friend built an add on for me to eventually make my own again. This is where I go to sit and think when my heart is heavy or I need to get away and soul search. For me to write, build or just be. It’s my serenity in a world I find I don’t fit in. I’m protected here with my ptsd, my depression and anxiety. From the hurts that occur in life that can just be too much sometimes. When I need a good cry or to jam to my music, LOUD and box until my arms are jello. Or just sit with my best friend, my boxer Rick James of 14 years. To breathe in the fresh air and hear the sounds of nature while I try to feel grounded somehow in my emotional quicksand. It’s not much but it’s mine and for now it’s my serenity. When nothing feels sturdy, it is. When I don’t know how I’ll make it through troubled times, my special place calms me somehow. It’s my therapy in a time when I need it more than ever. It’s much more than a cozy corner for me. It’s been my safe haven and saved me from myself. When I feel like the world is against me, it’s my shelter full of warmth, sanity and safety. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
By Abbey Balamucki5 years ago in Psyche
Losing Yourself
As human beings, the feeling of hopelessness has to be the most solemn emotion we're capable of feeling. I exist in this space wholly and mostly. When you are mentally incapacitated, no one can see it. When you suffer in mind and spirit, no one else can feel it. And when you suffer because the people you need to believe what you are experiencing is real, do not, you are left with a diminished sense of self.
By Marianne Suppa5 years ago in Psyche
Its been five years
It's been five years since i died.. i don't know how i did it but looking back i should have known that i would still miss everything about you. i don't want to tell you this but i tried to kill the pain. I tried drowning it for three years i did what i could to dull the hurt. I turned to a bottle of alcohol but no matter how much I drank I couldn't get you out of my head. I lied to myself over and over again i felt like Alice going down the rabbit hole deeper and deeper until i couldn't find my way back i was so scared and alone. there still are days that i cry knowing that this hole inside me won't ever be filled by any vice or person. I Know i'm different without you. i loved you more than i thought possible. the pain i experienced was not only the pain from losing you but knowing that it was all a lie. you never truly loved me but you lied so well.
By Chaos Adjacent5 years ago in Psyche
The Good B-Word
When I first heard about setting boundaries, I had no concept of what it meant. I was a curious kitty, and tried to dig up what a boundary means. Frankly, in doing my research, I didn't like what I read or how it made me feel. I realized I had been allowing my own boundaries to be crossed for years. I felt violated. I felt a sense of guilt, as though my allowing the breaking of boundaries was my fault, and I didn't deserve to feel sad or violated. I felt resentful. I also felt dumb for not knowing what a boundary was. Shouldn’t I have learned this somewhere? The process of boundaries seemed too hard to understand and implement. I was too timid to tell other people what I needed. I wasn’t bold, which I thought was a requirement in order to set a boundary.
By Denae Taylor5 years ago in Psyche
