Latest Stories

Most recently published stories in Psyche.

Fresh Start
What is it about the end of one measurement of time - a year, a birthday - and the beginning of another that inspires us to take such earnest stock of ourselves? It is at these points we seem to reduce ourselves, our souls and our psyches, to a balance sheet, and we almost always seem to come up lacking.
By Chris Shelton5 years ago in Psyche
Lost
It is with reluctance that I write this. For years, I have been addicted to self-sabotage. No matter what the year, place, time, date, I have always put others before myself. Even though I got “lost” and found this site, I honestly believe this is a good move.
By Doctor Bey5 years ago in Psyche
How to Remain Consistent With Journaling Therapy
Journaling therapy or healing every day for 10 minutes helps you to develop intuition. We always ask someone else to evaluate ourselves through self-reflection exercise, but you could do this yourself daily by developing a journaling habit.
By Kiran Khanna5 years ago in Psyche
A Listicle Letter Addressed to Me, Containing An Itinerary of Things I Really Ought to Improve About Myself in 2021
Dear Jack (a.k.a. You, a.k.a. Me), I think you know all too well that it's high time you upgraded your metaphorical physical and psychological OS settings. You're filled with bugs that need fixing, and you can't wait for others to help do it for you, so maybe give a hard reset and reboot a go?
By Jack Anderson Keane5 years ago in Psyche
Dear Diary, I'm Ready To Be Me.
I have never been big on New Year's Resolutions. For me the new year has always been just another date, an excuse to watch fireworks and party until late. Oh, and a constant struggle of writing the incorrect year on pretty much everything dated for the first few months of the year.
By Ash Sky5 years ago in Psyche
Walking Away. Top Story - February 2021.
As someone who has suffered from separation anxiety for most of their life, one of the hardest things for me has always been letting go of people, even when they're not good for me. The constant fear of being alone keeps me holding on, even when it hurts me. Because somehow I've convinced myself that the pain is worth it, even if it means losing myself in the process.
By Lita5 years ago in Psyche
What You can Learn from Me
If you've ever struggled with anxiety or depression, you've probably heard the term "wellness" an innumerable amount of times. As for myself, who has struggled with anxiety and depression, I've heard the term but never really knew what it meant. Wellness as in caring for myself? I had always been so caught up in my own mind that the idea confused me. For example, how could something as simple as me taking a shower somehow positively affect my mental health?
By Sarah White5 years ago in Psyche
Use Your Words
When I was a kid opinions were dangerous. Thinking for yourself could get you in trouble. Worse, not being what you were expected to be could get you left out. My favourite colours, music, movies, tastes, were always curated for the people around me at that particular moment. Constantly trying to fit myself into their view of the world. To make myself a part of what they liked. To make them like me. This could get tricky when more than one person or group was around at one time and I had to slip between characters and moods to make sure everyone stayed happy with me. I had to be smarter, more helpful and more entertaining to be seen. I was good at it. And when all else failed I could bury myself in a book and become invisible. And so writing came easily. Seriously, I won awards, and my mother kept every one in a brag book.
By Billie Argyle5 years ago in Psyche
Letting go of it..
This week has been an awakening for me. I’ve had multiple people reach out to me to say they have seen and read my entire blog. That they had no idea all of what I went through. Now knowing, they truly felt they needed to apologize to me for not doing more and honestly, I don’t know how to feel about it. I’ve been told I should feel grateful. I’ve been told to ignore it because it’s too late for I’m sorry as it does me no good today. I really don’t know how to approach it. I feel happy but confused. Angry but understanding. Hurt but loved. I’m having a really hard time with it. Not just because it caught me way off guard but because this blog was never about that for me. I didn’t write my truth looking for an im sorry. I wasn’t writing daily in search of compliments and platitudes. I did it for me and for others who needed to hear my horrors said out loud. I did it so others were no longer scared to share their own. Im stuck and wary of the new attention because I don’t trust the possibility of someone being truly genuine to me. I’ve lived a long while now not trusting and being suspicious and cold because it was safe. Im comfortable and complacent living in my bubble this way. So, to hear someone say to me that they love me and they wished they acted differently because I deserved better threatens my false comfort. I want it to be known that if you deeply mean what you say and it comes with no motive or expectation of forgiveness then I truly with my whole heart appreciate it. However, I still need it to be known that though im grateful in my reality, it doesn’t make a difference whether truly sorry or sorry just out of guilt. My pain remains and unless you have a magic wand to change the things that took place empathy is no good to me. Do I want to be loved? Absolutely. Do I want to know that my words have affected you in such a way they it drives you into making a difference that matters? Of course I do. But what I don’t want is the responsibility of clearing your conscience for you. I don’t want to have to apologize for you regretting your choices. Most of all I don’t want any more factitious sympathy or forced affection. My journey only has enough room for my baggage and im not willing or able to carry yours. I’m going to continue to do what’s right for me and what heals my soul. Regardless of your guilt or regrets. Please know im not saying any of this to hurt anyone’s feelings. I truly don’t want that but i have to be honest about how i feel. I can’t do that if I omit things for the sake of others feelings. I spent quite a few hours trying to decide how or if i was going to react. But today i witnessed something pure and it truly moved me. Today i witnessed a complicated and tattered but nonetheless enduring love. A love that stood in the face of sour feelings and bad experiences. A love unscathed in spite of the pain and emotional rubble it was in. It made my once numb heart feel a warmth and a glimmer of hope in life I never had. It made me see that not only can you prevail and move forward. You can also leave behind the hurt and the pain and still go on with life with love intact. I realized today what love really is at its core. It’s a willingness to understand one another not just for the good but in our bad as well. It’s learning that there is always room for improvement but also room for forgiveness. It’s remembering that life though fleeting is still a gift we can choose to treasure or throw away. I almost didn’t get this chance at a new life. If I had made even one different choice or had a change in my fate. I wouldn’t have all the blessings i have today. So ive decided im not going to waste any of it. Even if it means I have to keep moving forward no matter the cost. I have to free myself from the blame and the regrets and the what ifs. I need to fix all the pieces of me so i can make myself whole again. I have to commit my everything to whatever my tomorrow may be. In starting this journey, I was so hard for me to trying to figure out who the hell i was. I felt like a hollow shell with no direction or purpose. Slowly as I’ve made progress through therapy and in meeting others like me. I’ve found that im still who i used to be but with the freedom to learn from the pain and my mistakes I’ve made. That I am whoever i am today even with all the bad because im learning to let the anger and bitterness go. Most importantly im also going to be whoever i grow into because life is ever changing. I’ve seen the ugly i know it exists not just for me but for other people like me who have been abused and hurt by the ones they trusted most. But Im learning that there’s a beautiful life that awaits us on the other end of the trauma no matter how long it takes us to get there. I know my story isn’t over yet but as more times goes on im finding comfort in knowing that I am the one who gets the chance to write it anymore. I don’t know what life has in store for me but I know that it’s worth finding out and all I want to do is to help people who have suffered the same way I have to see that they matter and their life is worth it too.
By Parker5 years ago in Psyche
Bipolar, BPD, & CPTSD
True bliss can be hard to find, and when found it is a fragile state of being. I have been stable for almost two years now, yet I still search myself at night for fear of becoming manic or depressed again. I spent most of my adult life in one or another state of being, both a unique hell all it's own. I am lucky to be medicated into a stable state, yet I am aware all the lithium, seroquel, and lexapro in the world will never cure me. I am always in danger, always one episode from destroying my life again, and again.
By L.D. Malachite 5 years ago in Psyche
"It"
“It” gathered around my flesh as if I submerged myself in the pool that awaits the powerful fall of the water. The “it” we spend our conscious and sub conscious mind trying to acquire. “It” is a multitude of simplicities we weave into an overwhelming tarp of complexities that constrict us.
By Jada Ferguson5 years ago in Psyche
Why It’s So Difficult For Me To Leave My Husband?
People who’ve never been abused will wonder why a woman isn’t leaving her abusive relationship. Well, they can’t understand that leaving is sometimes more complicated and tough than it seems.
By Kiran Yasmin5 years ago in Psyche