To the Daughter I Never Had

I lay in bed stroking my tummy and ribs

I wonder how it would feel to carry you

How it would be to know you were growing inside

And to experience birthing you

I have often dreamt of this very thing

Of holding you in my arms and kissing your head

Imagining the softness of your newborn skin

And your sleeping little body in my bed

I imagine you'd be like me as an infant

Full head of hair, easy to care for

That I could hold you, look upon your face

And know I couldn't love you more

I wonder, as I sit up later at night

Writing line after line

Would you look like me

Would you have eyes like mine

Thinking of you, I feel so protective

I hope you'd be like me and your grandmother

Curious about life and all that's around

Smart and strong with a wit like no other

As I played with my nephews and nieces and other kids

I watched them learn and grow

Hoping the best of them would be the worst of you

Loving so much before you could know

And, though I never met you

I think of the kind of teenager you'd grow to be

Your likes, your hopes, your dreams, your fears

How much, if at all, you'd be like me

I hope you know I'd love you always

That you are safe in my arms at any age

I hope I taught you to be bold and strong

And not to let your dreams live in a cage

I think of the adult you'd eventually be

Creative, kind, and loving in womanhood

That you would have been prepared for life

And I helped you become all you could

My darling, my beautiful baby girl

I'd love you through it all, good and bad

Always be there for you in all stages of life

This is my promise to the daughter I never had