Notepad

Looking back, you were an outlet for things I couldn't say

Even on a lost track, you kept collecting all the pain that wouldn't fade

Time wasn't even a factor, there when my 3.am-thoughts kept me awake

I didn't always feel better after the visits, somethings just can't decay

You were my source of self-belief and self-doubt

Harboring every thing I couldn't say loud, humble with it in pride

Opening you up to open myself up to you, an opener's opening

You might be the reason why comfort in my own world sounded inviting

In your world, with me writing, with the moods striking

Scared of being wrong, failing in doing the right things

Emotions, loud and clear, like thunder and lightning

Emotions, sad and cryptic, ballad you're forced to watch and get stuck in

With you, we never cared if anyone liked us

We had each other from the mornings till when the moon comes on

Even when love came, you knew before I put the song on

So we've really been through both thistle and thorns

Being away from you makes me feel exposed

Almost like now I am forced to have these conversations

And the need to now express myself and how I really feel

I still come back to you for a deviation, some would say it's not standard

I made a lot of mistakes, rich in a currency called trauma

You helped me pour it out, without warning, downpour in the summer

You tried to convince me it wasn't my fault, protected me while i cowered

Dark room, mix of Mansion, Manual, spiced by Room 501 for my supper

A truth, unrevealed

A bread, unleavened

An album , unreleased

A notepad, untamed

When I was told I seem to have a habit of sabotaging friendships

I negated and believed it words of a fable teller

But now, a David without a Jonathan,Paul with no Silas

I wonder if it because you are occupying the seat at that price.