I don’t.

I don’t have feelings for you. Somehow I managed to look at the message but I still have no reply. In what ways can I describe someone so unique to the core. I don’t have feelings for you. I don’t think about the way you kissed me or the small sweet touches, because I don’t have feelings for you. I managed to let you get in my head.Feeding me the story you wanted me to hear. Was my mask that concealed. Did I leave you to believing lust could somehow prevail ? I don’t have feelings for you and you’ve made yourself pretty clear. I’m not stupid love, I know it’s also twos involved in a game chess. This round is hard. I never wanted to put up this many bars. I had to cause if not I’m sure your laziness and uncooperative energy would’ve drove me insane. Missing that reassurance that just comes so naturally. I don’t have feelings for you. You made me lay in silence with my own thoughts and no clarification and within those moments you lost the bit of any special feeling I had for you. I thought I could finally get know you. But how could that be when we are on different pages of a story. Hand crafted by god. You and I were never meant to be. I don’t have feelings for you and I still see that message in my head. How can I tell this so called man that my heart was never in a jam. Never crossed for two. Only having one true man on my mind. You were the one that said that time can only tell us why. In a way it’s ashamed hearing you say I’ve made a mistake when really it’s just projection from your own insecurities. Blaming me for doing what it is you’ve asked me to be. To be so simple in the naturalist form, effortlessly. Except you have envisioned me being high in the clouds stuck between your nape and your back. Like a puppy dog. Or a child who’s lost their way. You fight my logic even though in ways we were on the same page. Can’t figure out why you kept me waiting for so long. When you want someone you give them your all. So tell me why would I have feelings for a man who can’t love me and my flaws. Who loves me effortlessly and consistently. I’m special and you knew that. You know our minds connected in a spiritual way. It’s like limbo is your favorite game. So I threw the pole away. Took my power back. No more wasting precious energy. I don’t have feelings for you and this time it’s about me. You’re not all to blame though and that’s why I’m glad it was not meant to be . I don’t regret it because my heart would have never been at ease. How could I love you whole heartly when your words are like a mirror staring back at me. Because maybe your the ones with the feelings and you’ve already lost me. I’m happy. Wasn’t that ALL you wanted me to be?