“healing from grief”

dissipating

evaporating

floating

tearing

dissolving

melting

this is how i feel right now

reality feels like its melting

the colors are distorted and blur together

i feel like i'm dissipating in the wind

and with one forceful gust i'll be spread across the world

dust

ash

glitter

sprinkled through the sky

finally free, able to roam the world for eternity

one with the wind, one with the earth

our soul becomes one with the clouds

our body once 60% water, can finally unite with its origins

stardust

ocean water

dirt from the richest soil

while i know you are not gone,

it feels as though we are one. intertwined,

dissipating through the wind together

mingling in our existences,

just as our breaths once did.

i do not know what eternity means.

but i know what love is. i know that i loved you.

i know that our time was love-filled. brimming the edge and boiling over in joy and cherishing.

i know that you were love-filled. joy-filled. yours dreams and hopes and aspirations spanned worlds and surpassed that of your body

they touched me. your spirit touched me. it warmed my soul. you changed me. for the better. you made me into the person i am today

i do not know if i knew what love is before you.

not at least, what romantic love is.

indeed i barely comprehend what romance itself means. however, i know our time was timeless. it was childlike. it was easy.

we didn't have to question it. we didn't have to try and fall in love. we stumbled together, our hands holding, our breaths hitched and our eyes open.

i will always love you.

you will always be my first love.

you will not be my last.

i hope you knew how much i loved you.

i hope wherever you are, you feel my love for you still, i hope my light and warmth reaches you

i hope you are finally at peace