Fill In The Gaps

I see with blurry eyes,

A world that may not be real.

Fragments lost along the way,

Pieced together one by one.

The puzzle cannot stick inside,

Their edges will not fit.

My childish eyes deceive me,

My memories cannot be trusted.

I’m told what once was real,

Then mix them with my mind.

My childish imagination,

Can never be fully trusted.

I see my nose in front of me,

My tiny childish legs.

It’s boiling hot above me now,

So, Summer I associate with.

There’s water everywhere,

I cannot swim that well.

I see the boy inside my eyes,

He’s towering right above me.

I feel malevolence in his soul,

As he looks below.

Sees me struggling under here,

Then pushes me further down.

I feel myself try to breathe,

I feel it all around.

The world above,

Is filled with dread,

And salty, teary water.

I try to reach the surface,

My body cannot face.

A swirling rippling world,

Lies inches from me now.

This is but a memory,

That comes in tiny fragments.

I’m a liar to myself,

I tell myself this story.

For decades I remembered,

This happening to me.

Elements false they come in droves,

Myself I cannot rely,

My mind it likes to fool.