checking out early

the hotel of greatness

had you starting out

on the basement floor

with all your doubts

but you checked out early

on cigarettes,

on pills

and a toxic level

of drambuie swills

dressed to the nines

to meet your maker

not leaving behind

even a note on paper

just scrawling the word liar

across his photograph

and wishing upon him

the curse of wrath

for marrying you

as his cover

using you

as a front for his gay lover,

gaslighting you

as you found the proof

snapping hard

when you held the truth

he preferred to lie and abuse

than to admit

his disgusting truth

that you were only ever

someone to use

chosen for being good

at ignoring the clues

until you began to

open your eyes,

seeing that he was the shit

and you were the flies,

looking right

through his veiled disguise

but the pain of awakening

was too much to take

there was too much deception

and everything was fake,

and his evil had spread

through everyone you knew

all on his side

spitting at you

so

dressed to the nines

to meet your maker

not leaving behind

even a note on paper

you checked out early

on cigarettes,

on pills

and a toxic level

of drambuie swills,

you were always of

such high aspirations

yet you chained yourself

to low vibrations

building upon

shaky foundations

and greatness felt

too far out of reach