You're NOT F*cking Alone In 2021

Many of us have been let down before... The ONE person we were supposed to be able to count on didn't pull through. They left us hanging, or hurt us, or just genuinely disappointed us.

This is the story that many of us have chosen to claim due to it being "the path of least resistance".

It's true. Sometimes shutting off our expectations can lead us away from pain into a "safer" space of "well fuck them, I'm going to do me".

What I've found in my journey, is that the so called "safe space" we allow ourselves to be in, actually becomes more of a prison as time goes on. It boxes us in, and takes our power for 2 main reasons.

One, if you avoid an outcome of any-kind, you're destined to avoid SCENARIOS that breed that outcome.

(i.e. If you choked on candy once, and it scared the shit out of you. You might stop eating candy all together and never taste anything new that might not have the same consistency - or taste the same)

So this first consequence leaves us wading through a pool of "safe" options in a life where we came to explore the DEEP END.

The second consequence here is that we shut ourselves off out of ASSUMPTION that every seemingly similar scenario will end the same way. This would be okay is we didn't live in a universe where what you FEEL about any given subject ATTRACTS MORE OF IT! Lol

It's a self fulfilling prophecy. When you push against something you don't want, you are literally aligning with the having of it because the Universe doesn't know what "No" means. It's a Non-bias universe which is why we're allowed to have Liars, Cheaters, Wars, & Murderers amongst Monks, Gurus, Healers, and Lightworkers.

But the one thing that I've found most detrimental about these assumptions we draw conclusion on... Is the fact that our wounds make us push away people who might actually be there to assist us.

The valid problem is that we push away those who might actually be there to help us break free of this prison. But since we're Free-Will Beings... We also have the freewill to close ourselves off to our lifelines (or the very people who could assist us in changing our lives). And this happens all because of some incident years and years ago that left a "bad taste in our mouths".

You know that term "Bitter Old Man/Woman"? Well that's most often the final taste in our mouths when we allow our decisions to be made out of fear.

The core problem here is that we've let a situation dictate who we are. We say "well that's just the cards I was dealt" or "THAT'S why I am the way I am".

It is fucking devastating to me how many times I've not only seen this pattern but EXPERIENCED it myself. It's POWERLESS!! We are literally cutting ourselves down by making a decisions before we can even TRY to prove ourselves right.

And then we see coaches or motivational speakers talking like it's easy and get upset because we feel they've been dealt a better hand, or their situation must have been easier. Our victimhood is so deep we'll come up with ANY number of justifications as to why we're not a better version of ourselves..

Meanwhile we have all of these dreams! And everyday that we place blame on another, or our families, or their parents or where ever, and don't take a stand to say "The pattern stops with me!" - we let that dream die a little more...

We CONVINCE ourselves of our short-comings to the point that we BECOME incapable.

"Well isn't that fucking rich?" <---- The Bitter Self-Said.

How about, "Well isn't this awareness (that I didn't have before) a nice OPPORTUNITY for me to take my power back?" INSTEAD!

And NOT beat ourselves up for being HUMAN. The self-shaming (ad shaming of others) is the real issue... Not everything or everyone needs to be blamed. We've all been through shit. And the truth is the person or people that hurt you were hurting as well. That doesn't make it okay but ATLEAST that should help you understand that it's more about them than it is about you.

And you know what sucks.. Is the whole time you're justifying your shortcomings and arguing for your limitations... There are People out here who ACTUALLY understand YOU. Because they've done the work themselves. And you're hesitant to reach out because you'd rather feel safe in your prison.

That shit hurts my heart.

Not one person that I've spoken with in a consult or a coaching call has ever told me (and stuck to the words) they "want to live a safe life". It's a valid desire to be safe (especially when you're in unsafe circumstances) but once I coach them and they begin to feel safe they're like "I want to THRIVE".

Like, THAT'S the end goal! So why not skip the surviving mechanisms and just go straight to thriving?? It's possible. People wake up everyday with epiphanies and turn their lives around. Most of these people have had OTHER PEOPLE to guide them through these epiphanies.

That being said - sometimes in more extreme situations it's necessary to take it slower and not just jump to thriving, but the point is quit choosing to be a victim, there is no power there. And if you don't know how to do that, then work with someone who's figured it out.

Literally the whole point that I'm trying to make here is that YOU ARE NOT FUCKING ALONE - ESPECIALLY in 2021! You might be hurt, and you might feel alone, but on a earth with 7.5 BILLION humans on it. There is NO chance that you are alone. Quit feeding the illusion, and start reaching out for support. It's time. 2021 Is the time. Period.

I Love You,

Zameer Kurji