What They Don't Tell You and What to do About it.

Imagine this scenario in your head:

You're a fresh college graduate, excited and anxious to see what the world has to offer. You're also pressured to find a job quickly, because student loans are chasing you, as well as any dream of moving out of mom and dads to once again feel like an independent adult. So you find a job that you're qualified for and you get it! You're so happy to have achieved this goal for yourself, and soon you're making those paychecks, moving into your own little apartment, independent and free once again.

A year goes by, you're living your young adult life like you had always imagined: surrounded by friends, a bit selfish at times, and full of experiences you'll never forget. But slowly, you notice there's this tiny feeling inside you that wasn't there before. It's not overwhelming, but strong enough to make your mind spiral every now and then or give you a knot in your stomach when you wake up. And the feeling grows because you ignore it, and it turns into confusion and helplessness because you're waking up everyday going through the motions but not living and being present. And you dread that job now that gives you the opportunity to live the life everyone deems desirable. You take it out on the people you love and only look forward to Friday at 5 pm through Sunday every single week. The worst part is, no one told you this could happen and now you are the only one able to get yourself out.

Spoiler alert: that story is my story.

But don't worry, it didn't end there. It's amazing what determination, a boatload of spirituality, and purpose can do for a person. I just wish someone would have told me sooner. What happened after the rock bottom mindset of "Oh shit I'm unhappy and stuck with bills to pay what now" was a lot of work. Work that involved asking myself how I really wanted my life to look like and what did I need to do to get there. Work that involved investing in myself like I had never done before and making people in my life question my decisions. Many days I remember thinking this can't be it. People can't really live lives of such discomfort and emptiness in their day to day and get away with it. But we do. And it's either because we don't realize we have the power to create a life we are in love with, or we don't believe in ourselves enough to do so.

Let me mention the biggest lesson I've learned through it all. The fear of the unknown, the fear of failure, the fear of burning down your foundation to build something new never goes away. What changes is your ability to be scared and do it anyway. The more I practiced taking little risks and living in my authenticity, the more I realized fear was just another emotion. And like all emotions, we can recognize it, respect it, and kindly say fuck off. It will always show up because it's in our nature to protect ourselves, but the power we give it is entirely up to us.

Whatever your life looks like I hope you can see that you can change it at any time. It's easy to fall into what's expected and most people will commend you for it. It's scary to think about what could be different and what risks would have to be taken to get there. However, it seems much scarier to stay and wonder what life could have been if you had the nerve to try.