The Singular Power Of Gratitude

The billionaire entrepreneur, Oprah Winfrey, once said: "Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough."

I guess she should know about gratitude because she seems to have so much to appreciate! I try to live by that maxim as much as I can.

Without realising it we often go through life taking the fact that we actually wake up for granted, taking the people in our lives for granted, ignoring our achievements and downplaying the wondrous beings we are. The only time we are likely to appreciate what we have is, sadly, when we lose any part of it. Even when we want something from our God or the Universe, we might pray fervently but when we get that wish, we tend to forget to give thanks for it!

But an attitude of gratitude is so important because it serves three main functions:

1. Gratitude emphasises that whatever we are enjoying, from life itself to the wonders of nature, is a precious gift, always temporary. Nothing is guaranteed, nothing can be assumed or expected as of right. We live at the mercy of Nature and the Universe.
2. Gratitude emphasises who we are, where we are going and the power of self-belief.
3. Gratitude connects us to others in an essential social interaction that brings dreams to reality, giving purpose and meaning to whatever we do. The greatest joy is the happiness of a loved one which we have enabled.

I have been grateful for everything in my life, especially since my brother was brutally murdered at 17 years old, some years ago. His young life cut short and all that promise permanently stilled in a single moment of madness. I have kept reminding myself that I had been granted the gift of life which he no longer had, and I had to be thankful for it, no matter how long it lasted. However, I my gratitude increased in earnest from 2001 when I lost both parents, a sister of 36 years old and my long marriage, all within 18 months. I thought my world was falling apart.

One minute I had them all and another moment they were all gone. But what kept me going through all that pain was one recurring and important realisation: I was still alive each day. I needed nothing else to give me a reason to be thankful. I was breathing. That was the most important thing for me. If I wake up and see my ceiling, I give thanks. It feels sweet. As each day could be my last, especially with my long term illness, my aim is to enjoy every moment. So I do not do negativity or undue fear.

Every day I do six main things in gratitude:

1. As soon as I wake up I give thanks for another precious day of life, and ask for help to live it in joy, success and contentment, forgiveness, compassion and love.
2. Then I give thanks for every significant person in my family and circle sent to accompany me on my personal journey.
3. I go to a mirror, smile and tell myself what an amazing human being I am; how beautiful and compassionate, giving thanks for being made into the perfect image of my Universe.
4. I give thanks for all my money, possessions, everything I have achieved in my life/career and for my unending creativity.
5. I promise to give a smile to, or do a kind deed for, at least one person that day, to ensure that connection. Then I try to think of nothing but positive thoughts after that. I don't always succeed with the positivity, depending on the circumstances and what happens that day, but at least I make a big effort.
6. When doing my simple running exercises for my health, I keep saying: "Running makes me youthful, running makes me beautiful". I am over 60 years old and my picture speaks for itself!

These simple acts are the most empowering I have found to start every new day. Often I find myself smiling with the sheer joy of living because gratitude helps me to cope with the bad times, too, by not dwelling on them. But the three most amazing things that have come out of this simple regime of gratitude is that:

• People who actually meet me keep echoing my own words by telling me how 'beautiful' and 'remarkable' I am, and how they 'love' my smile;
• The more grateful I am the more happier I am and the more I seem to get in my life, despite my life threatening illness.
• I have few negative moment because life is far less stressful.

Putting yourself in an attitude of gratitude can be very difficult at first, especially after a lifetime of only seeing the negatives, of putting yourself down, or getting no value from others. But once you start with just a word of thanks every morning for simply being alive, and for those you value in your life, you are on your way. Appreciating everything else that comes to you not only becomes quite natural, but will be sheer joy to have.

RELATED PODCAST: Why Some People Find It Difficult To Say 'Thank You'​

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