The Demon of Jealousy

The pain of jealousy holds a sad end. Makes you wish you were experiencing things with someone when it seems so easy to hang out with them. That feeling inside that shows up as loneliness or the fear of missing out. The idea of you working when the people you know are out enjoying life with people (or themselves). The hole that you put yourself in knowing that you could have changed parts of your life so you can possibly enjoy your own time with people. The fear and anxiety build up like a pit in your stomach. Jealousy is not about the other person whether it is friends or family. Jealousy is derived from the insecurities you find within yourself. 

Acknowledging the jealousy that you have is the first step to overcoming it. By identifying what you are feeling, you bring awareness of its existence. Sometimes it's difficult to see it. Judgment and insecurities are projected on the people or person that jealousy takes place. When your identity or ego is threatened, jealousy takes from which grows as strong as the lingered feeling that you feel. The feeling can disrupt your self-image which causes you to believe that the person or people that are a big part of making you happy, could be happy or find a sense of happiness or joy without you. 

Codependency has a correlation with jealousy due to the reliance that someone or something has a higher influence on your well-being than you do. Having been raised in conditions where your needs (to whatever extent) weren't met, you yearn for the sense of acceptance and security in the ones you have close to when you are older. 

This internal struggle is from the source within. Taking a step back and realize that it will be ok if the person or people are doing whatever they are doing. Understanding that what they do has no effect or impact on their relationship with you. Jealous prevents you from self-actualizing. Jealousy holds you back from doing things that make you better and happy because it creates negative emotions that can linger. Jealousy causes you to stay in a state where you focus on others rather than yourself. To relate, you will slowly wither down in self-loathing.

There are a few methods to gain control over jealousy. Realize that it is below your standards. Acknowledging that the inner thoughts you feel are a result of the current standing that you may be in. Unable to obtain or do those things and seeing someone else achieving that can be daunting but flip that feeling on its head. Seeing that can inspire you to keep pushing towards that goal to do that thing or obtain what you are unable to.

Think of it as a way of seeing firsthand what it's like at the end of that tunnel. Visualizing it when that happens. Maybe you may not be able to achieve it with the one you want but finding success in that is what the goal is. Success in yourself is the defeat of jealousy. We cannot hold others to the value of self-happiness. These variables we hold people accountable for will only provide temporary happiness rather than tranquility and peace within oneself.

Jealousy can be conquered by breaking down the moments through their parts. Identify and observe your feelings while externalizing the emotions as it happens. Consistency in practicing mindfulness helps to be honest with yourself. Above all else, do the opposite of what jealousy does to you. Feeling internally jealous is changed to giving them the benefit of the doubt. By complimenting on those accomplishments that you desire that you see in them, you make yourself a lot bigger than the jealousy that brings you down. Thus making you a lot more approachable resulting in weakening this demon of jealousy.