The Day I Chose to Start Again

At one point in my life,

the world around me crumbled like a house of cards.

After losing my position as a content writer at a small digital agency, I was 26 years old and struggling to stay afloat in a rented apartment in Chittagong, Bangladesh. The boss simply stated that they were unable to pay me anymore one day.

The end of it. There was no warning and no plan B. Even though it wasn't perfect, that job gave me a purpose. I enjoyed writing, particularly about music and feelings. I believed I was finally constructing something. But all of a sudden, I was sitting at my desk without any emails, deadlines, or plans for the future.

When even enthusiasm seems pointless When I

stopped uploading lo-fi music to my YouTube channel under the name Indie Lofi, things got worse.

My latest tracks barely received 100 views, and my few subscribers were uninteresting. I had expended so much energy on sound selection, artwork, and visual editing.

It appeared pointless.

Then there was silence. the kind of silence that surrounds you when your dreams seem to be disappearing. I shut myself in for days. I stayed away from friends and ignored family calls. I told my mother I was "doing great," which was a lie. But on the inside,

I felt like I was going away. I began to doubt everything, including my choices, abilities, and worth.

A Light in the Darkness I then sat on the floor with only my notebook and a candle one night during a prolonged power outage. I was reminded of something my father once told me,

"You don’t have to be brilliant every day." by that flickering flame. You just need to keep shining." It really hurt me. That's when I decided to start over, this time with just one small step rather than a big plan. I opened my journal and started writing about how I was feeling. Despite its flaws, it was mine.

The First Backward Step I published a short story on Vocal Media the following morning. I didn't think much of it. However, I received my first few reads within a week. Even a comment that said, "This spoke to me" was left by someone. I was more motivated than I had been in months by that one comment.

I began writing about mental health, music, failures, and lessons more frequently. Slowly, I realized that I was rebuilding, not someone who had failed.

Reviving My Vision and Voice Additionally, I resurrected my YouTube channel.

I shifted my focus from obsessing over numbers to creating music that felt real. Unexpectedly, one of my tracks received 10,000 views a few months later. Although it didn't go viral, it felt like a victory. Now, a few years later, I run my modest but expanding music channel in addition to working as a freelance writer.

I am not wealthy. I continue to have bad days. But I know when I get up in the morning that I didn't give up when everything told me to. Your Low Point Is Not the End Please know that if you are reading this and are feeling stuck, it is acceptable to pause, but you should not give up. You are permitted to begin from scratch as many times as necessary. Your grave is not at rock bottom. Your foundation is it.