Sour Patch

Okay, this isn't going to be my usual warm fuzzy story. As this new generation's lingo goes...this year, I've been "in my feels." As the reflecting goes for this challenge on Vocal, my summation would be:

"I would have been just fine except for all the relationships in my life!" You see, in one way or another, they have all been a bit sour.

I will start with the outliers and go inward to home and hearth:

My association with the "outside" world remains a bit virtual. I have no friends I go have lunch with in this small town I retired to. I have very few friends calling me up on the phone just to chit chat, either. I left behind two of my work buddies I did those things with to another state when I retired and moved six hours away. They are both still working and still married and I can't qualify myself in that status (married) anymore, either. There are distances in those relationships now.

My connection with my siblings hasn't been what I would like it to be, either. As the recent election in the United States proved, our country is very divided. And so it has been within many families, mine included. Politics have strained many homes around our nation. There have been heated debates not televised and the ostracization has caused pain and regret. A time out and cooling down period is often required.

Having four grown children with children and grandchildren of their own, automatically assures that there will be endless rivalries, drama, heartaches, and conflict. I can clearly remember my own grandmother softly warning me that,

"when children are little, they step on your toes, but when they grew up, they step on your heart."

(She had not lied.)

This day and age, it seems that instead of communicating openly, respectfully, and honestly, all of that has gone out of the window. There are months and even years that the solution has been to shut others out of their lives altogether.

Apparently, it is a trend? Has it always been that way, and I'm just now noticing? Just questions I sometimes ask myself...

And, even having loving fur-ball babies in your life can cause a great deal of discomfort to the human heart...maybe because they give so much unconditional and safe love, support, and joy...when it comes time to say goodbye, it is that much harder. They can be the only source of comfort and truth to some.

I've lost three pets since moving, retiring, and becoming single again. I have one dog left and two cats. Each day, I love them more and more because I know the value in each moment spent with them.

Please don't misunderstand! This is not a pity party. These are just the facts of my life. It may not have been what I've planned for or certainly not what I wanted life to be like, but I am a realist and what I'm not doing is asking for your sympathy.

I refuse to fall victim to either my own choices or to my unforeseen circumstances, either. I also refuse to be bitter when I can be better! I have a solid footing and I'm just stubborn enough to survive the storms that life brings. What is my survival plan? How do I make life sweeter?

* God's character and His promises give me the solid footing needed. I know that as long as He is in my view, I won't lose my way. I trust in Him. He is more than enough. I am the child of the Most High God. It's all working according to His plan and purpose and now I make sense of life.

* I'm not lonely even if I'm alone. Human companionship is both priceless and costly and to be cherished. But that companionship cannot be confused with your self-worth. Be around those that celebrate your being, not those who just tolerate it. Know who and whose you really are and don't compromise your own principles for any trade-offs in life.

* Love others lavishly. Even when they don't deserve it. Especially if they don't deserve it. (do any of us really?) Be willing, at least!

* Reframe your current situations. Don't allow a match to become a bonfire. And even if there is a fire, contain it. It will burn out soon anyway. If possible, bring some marshmallows to roast...make it useful somehow.

* Vote and be done with it. Pray for our country and the world. If your candidate wins, don't gloat. Just be grateful. If the "other side" wins, console yourself that it's God who is really in charge and "it" will change our character and the character of our country through some hard lessons. But remember, we are ALL Americans and should be willing to die for our freedoms.

* Always be kind. No exception to that rule.

* Live your life in gratefulness.

* Occupy your thoughts with positives.

* When you can help, do so!

* When you can't help, pray. Pray even if you can help.

* If you find it difficult to look yourself in the mirror, then have a come to Jesus talk with that person until you like what you see. Make changes. If you don't like you, then who will?

* Seek to understand and be a better listener...listen with your heart!

* Tell the truth, but be gentle and loving when doing so.

* When you need to cry, then cry.

* Laugh often and laugh hard. Find things to laugh about. Remember things you laughed about before. Laugh at them again. Just laugh!

* In life, there are seasons. Happiness comes and goes, but joy is a choice. Happiness depends on circumstances...joy comes from above.

I pray that all those in my life and those that I can influence will be given a liberal dose of faith or renewed faith. We need air, food, and water to survive, but with faith you can thrive. Life can then be sweeter even with the sour times.