Saying No Saved My Dream

By Abdullah, a Student Learning to Say Yes to Himself

I have always been the "Yes man."

The guy people call when their printer breaks down.

When a Word document requires formatting.

When a cousin wants assistance with a PowerPoint slide.

When someone needs to get a CV done at the last minute.

And I said yes. Every time. Not because I enjoyed the work.

Not because I had free time.

But because I was afraid.

Afraid of being rude.

Afraid of losing friends.

Afraid they wouldn't be there for me if I ever needed them in return.

And secretly, afraid that if I didn't assist, they'd say,

"Abdullah thinks he's something now. He's changed."

So I continued saying yes — even when my own aspirations started to lose definition.

???? The Conflict: My Dream vs. Their Expectations

I'm learning to be a web developer — not a computer technician, not a graphic designer, not a document writer.

But everybody else around me — in my city, in my neighborhood, even in my household — glances at "computer" and instantly concludes that anything tech-related is within my purview.

They don't see the late-night struggles I have with lines of JavaScript.

They don't see me debugging errors in the dark.

They don't notice the projects I'm constructing with trembling hands and wishful eyes.

They simply notice a boy who can operate a laptop.

And that comes at a cost.

???? The Moment That Woke Me Up

Only two days ago, I was approached by a student of botany I hardly knew who requested I create a document for him.

I agreed.

Then he approached me again with revisions.

And I felt this heat rise in my chest — not anger at him, but anger at myself.

I had a programming module open. I was in the flow.

But I closed it, again, to do his work.

And at that moment, I thought:

"If I keep saying yes to everyone else, when will I say yes to me?"

???? Saying No… Without Losing Myself

It wasn't easy. Still isn't.

The first time I told someone no, my hands were trembling. It was like I was letting down the entire world.

But then I understood something:

Saying no doesn't make me rude.

Saying no doesn't make me selfish.

Saying no makes me respect my time, my objectives, my future.

I began using responses such as:

"This isn't in my skill set, but I can direct you."

"Currently I'm busy with programming — I can't do anything else."

"I understand. I'm working on creating something big for my future."

And gradually, the guilt disappeared.

And something else replaced it:

Clarity.

???? A Message to Anyone Who Feels the Same

If you're the type of person who can't say no — I get you.

I know the guilt.

I know the fear of rejection.

I understand how isolating it is when others stop phoning you because you're no longer "useful."

But I assure you:

It is not wrong to defend your time.

It is not selfish to defend your peace.

And it's always worth the uncomfortable silence to grow into your dream.

You are not here to be a helper.

You are here to build, to grow, to shine.

Learn to say no when you must.

And say yes — loudly, proudly — to your own future.

Thank you for reading.

This isn't a motivational speech.

It's just a little truth from a student learning to stand up — gently, but firmly — for himself.

????✊

— Abdullah, Code Jester

???? Share this if:

You've ever struggled to say "no."

You're learning to protect your energy.

Or you want others to understand the quiet fight behind your polite smile.