Recognise your worth ❤️

First off EVERYTHING happens for a reason whether or not you choose to see it , it serves its purpose in the end . . It’s takes much more strength to forgive and a lot less energy to be thankful.

Don’t drain yourself with negative energies , it’s not about revenge or ‘one upping’ whatever it is you are dealing with. It’s more to do with how you react,how you pick yourself up and how you choose to move with it , no matter the despair don’t allow any situation to define your character. RISE ABOVE IT ALL.

First and foremost before anyone forgive yourself •Be at peace with yourself so that you are are able to handle each and every Situation with the best of yourself approach it in a gentle manner, don’t allow yourself to handle anything when you aren’t at ease and in a place of anger and hurt.

Forgive yourself for seeing the red flags and choosing to ignore it simply for wanting to enjoy the moment or because you loved that person or those people , whatever resonates.

Do not hate YOURSELF FOR LOSING your sense of self 👆🏾 for the longest time you may have felt like you didn’t know who you were because your actions your mannerisms and image were not familiar to you. no one knows your story , don’t allow them to define who you are based on the past.

Don’t apologise for wearing your heart on your sleeve , because that’s who YOU are , you were made to love at your fullest and you shouldn’t have to downplay the amount you give just because others have taken advantage of it in the past.

Don’t listen to anyone who tries to tell you you’re ‘stupid’ for giving away your last bit of money.Who cares about that , you have a job you will get paid again on your pay day , Materialistic things don’t hold any value of sentiment anyways. Mentally when they are taking to much out of you to the point where you are no longer you is when it’s damaging.

Don’t ever think you have to dim your light to fit in or to be noticed or because your scared to lose people.Generally it’s about finding people who are warm and receptive of whatever you have to offer and don’t even think you have to answer to anyone but yourself.

Don’t blame yourself for wanting to be apart of something because it bought you temporary happiness even though it held you down, you were Damaged and you didn’t even know. No one not even YOU can blame you for filling the empty void you feel despite the toxicity in your circumstances (family , friends, randoms etc) Because you maybe have not even realised that your empty.

Release all the negative and nasty comments you’ve heard about yourself , keeping those in your head will only intensify the pain you have been feeling. Even if they are true , WHO CARES. That isn’t you anymore , that was never you to start off with, mistakes are made and stories get twisted , release it for your own good

Accept challenges for what they are they are all about change and a brighter outlook , don’t destruct over unfavourable situations.

Forgive those who wronged you.Some may not even realise that they’ve hurt you because they are blind to their own pain , but you holding onto the pain will only pull you into a dark place .

Learn to see your own fault in situations so that you can understand if you provoked it in any way and if you did then right your wrongs, apologising to someone isn’t a sign of weakness , it merely states you are adult and mature enough to admit when you are wrong. If you are Pointing fingers that alone won’t do any justice especially if you know your own actions weren’t always as sincere in the past as you thought , the way in which you approach a person or situation , is the way it shall be resolved, deliverance is key. Be gentle on yourselves and others. On the contrary that there speaks high on your surroundings of all forms as it is only a reflection of you.

This is where we reflect and look at ‘receptive’ behaviours, some of not most are accounted for therefore left unsaid although sometimes people just treat you bad THE SAD TRUTH is you will come across multiple people in your life who will hurt you and honestly sometimes there’s no reason for it, which is where you’ll start to feel confused , unworthy , trolled laughed at etc etc, but take it on the chin Don’t spend hours , days weeks or months trying to figure out HOW or WHY some people are just so cruel and it’s hard to live with because you wouldn’t do them they want they did you. It is a hard pill to swallow and unfortunately one that doesn’t leave you will much of an explanation other than that’s just how they move. Instead have your moment , forgive and move forward but of course you are well within your rights to be hurt and upset over it , forgiving them doesn’t mean you need to reconcile the former relationship (whatever that was/is) •Recognise Your Emotions • Feel your pain don’t suppress it • Control your temper • Dont act up while emotionally unstable .It’s tests like these that really teach you how strong you really are when you restrain yourself from releasing any hate and still love unconditionally. It is Simply letting go of the situation itself without dragging it on for long periods of time when the hurt attatched to is is not worth carrying around ... let it go ❤️

Be kind and if you aren’t in a place of peace you are not ready to confront the situation at hand , so don’t force it. However BE GENTLE .. NOT NAIVE if you choose to keep them in your life. The actions of others should never reflect on your personality. Stay true to who you are.

Some people think it’s naive to even forgive in some cases and still be there or still allow them in your life. NO. It’s not , in my eyes it’s not even about being the bigger person ! It’s simply the fact that You will not allow such downfalls to force you into thinking You need to close yourself off because coming out of a place of confusion , means you made a promise to yourself to never go back and choosing to believe not all people are like that and that everyone really can change if they wanted to. Sometimes it could be that the actions of yourself is what bought it all on in the first place (In Most not ALL cases) you can still forgive and move past it , you’ve learnt your lesson enough to avoid the same shit in the future BUT if you keep failing to see the reason for why challenges are thrown at you , the Cycle will continue to repeat itself. Back to dealing with cutting off the situation of course if cutting them out completely is what you feel comfortable then that’s on you each to their own, however forgiving them and still allowing them in your life brings out a tremendous amount of strength in yourself that you didn’t know you had.

ONLY YOU are guilty of sabotaging yourself. In the end by choosing to keep yourself in certain situations it only proves just how much you failed to see that you are worthy of so much more YOUUU ARE WORTHY than what’s been given but because this feeling of stagnation and self doubt is so familiar to you , you believed that this was just how ‘life’ goes because you were afraid of change , afraid of taking a leap in a direction where you would be required to walk alone .You were afraid of being alone and that’s what’s caused you to conform into something and someone you never were. You knowingly broke day in and day out . You wore a mask, you became someone else you weren’t because you didn’t like to say no, you may not have always been around at times you left to get your head straight but you showed up whenever they NEEDED YOU. you gave your all even when you knew you weren’t capable anymore. You were vulnerable for the longest time and for the most part never expected anything back. As cliche as this sounds ‘ You can fake a smile , but you can’t fake your feelings’ is such a powerful refutation. It is one thing a lot of people manage to master but it’s only a matter of time before you wear yourself out .In the long run when you start to get too tired ..

your eyes no longer match the smile you wear, Your smile no longer matches the energy you give out and eventually you walk around showcasing the defeat in your physical appearance

..and that’s when you know the battle your fighting against yourself is too much for one to handle, you may even start to slip up and lose your ways even more.

Even when your trying to elevate the best of yourself, if you are doing it with a mask on you’ll always lose due to a lack of inner peace , happiness value and love. Without even realising it your substituting your energy with bitterness and giving off a mean dismissive vibe , you’ve now reached a point of pessimism.

However PLEASE do not beat yourself up for it there’s always room for a fresh start. release your burdens , search for you ! There’s never a time limit on clearing your sleight and starting again. It’s never too late to work on yourself . We go through multiple phases in our lives and who we are Changes in every chapter. we are forever changing , so if you think it’s too late. It’s not. Infact any time you decide to love yourself is always the perfect time because that represents that YOU ARE READY FOR CHANGE and it can be hard to know where to start when you walk on to a clear path with no signs .. start with seeing that you have an inner knowledge of the fact that you are NOT OKAY and that in itself is an achievement even though you can’t see it , ACKNOWLEDGMENT is step 1 and you did that. So be proud no matter how big or small and no matter what anyone says because they don’t know hard it was for you to admit it. Just deciding you needed to change something was a start. Accept the little victories however you can.

Most of the time you won’t realise how much you deserve until whatever it is breaking you , finally breaks everything you have IN YOU leaving you defeated and questioning WHYYY??? WHAT DID I DO ??? AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH ????

The ANSWER is YES you are good enough , in fact you’re MORE than good enough, to the right people. Your thoughts alone are one of the most dangerous remedies for self destruction and all this time you were blind to the fact that you playing a part in your sense of confusion because you were a slave to your thoughts. A lot of the time you will sit there and think of the reasons why people do you they way they do or why things happened they way they did , which only leaves more room for negativity to pile up.

Instead of trying to figure all that out UNDERSTAND THIS‼️‼️

Not everyone wants to see you succeed , not everyone wants the best for you and sometimes there’s really no reason for it other than the fact that they don’t want to see you happy because it brings them joy or a sense of domination and as stupid as this sounds .... not those sort of people , but that statement itself .. IT IS OKAY ‼️‼️ because you don’t need their APPROVAL nor do you need VALIDATION to be you. Ride the waves and run with that shit. YOU FIRST • ALWAYS • to really be able to be the best version of yourself , it’s all in the first 3 letters . Starts with YOU.

Whatever you want , go for it. PLEASE do not allow toxic and negative situations and people to manipulate you into thinking you are crazy because your not .Dont allow them to make you feel small or feel like you always need to do stuff , resist manipulation and don’t be a victim to your own fears of disappointing people , half the time they probably would’ve been okay with it but you never said no. Don’t fall victim to belittling behaviours of someone else’s / and or everyone else’s (if it’s a group of people or more than 1 person) hidden insecurities. Notice who says what & when they say it.

When you say yes constantly out of fear of disappointing the person you are saying no to , that is you surrendering your worth , when you feel bad for not doing what you want to do you are ignoring your worth .. ANYTHING YOU DO that isn’t what you want to do or out of fear , you are allowing yourself to be belittled. They notice it . And they run with it . Don’t be afraid to make you a priority , no matter what the cost. Losing yourself starts with something so small and it’s builds , don’t allow that for yourself , want more for you.

Truth is if you really want it , YOU CAN HAVE IT ! All it takes is hard work ! There 1000000% will be SETBACKS AND DOWNFALLS , but if it’s that important to you ,You’ll work your ass off for it no matter how long it takes , you’ll continue to pick yourself up and try again. Starting with things as little as trying to replace a negative thought with a positive one ! So instead of why did that happen ? You could say to yourself ‘ I’m glad that’s over.

Also learn to accept that you won’t always get the clarity or closure you want so stop chasing it , you are only hurting yourself more because you’re unable to comprehend it ‼️ Most times closure awaits you at the end of your journey when you finally close that chapter , you’ll find that you gain Knowledge of the what’s or why’s when you have a look at where you are standing. THIS is why certain things had to happen the way they did to get to where you are right now. There is a blessing or a lesson in everything we do. All we can do is deal with it best we can & pray for the days of contentment to come faster to block out the pain but don’t do that ! FEEEL EVERY BIT of it so you can heal, trust that the pain will fade because eventually it’ll be okay. •That is the true meaning of life•

In saying that despite the inner strength you’ll need to channel in order to carry on remember that it’s not going to happen overnight IT IS OKAY ‼️to be sad over the situations you’ve been dealt , it’s okay to cry in circumstances that have come to burden you , IT. IS. OKAY! ‼️You are only human so allow the emotions you feel to come out so that you made rid your body of those feelings to truly deal with any situation you need to ALLOW yourself to feel ALL of it . STEER CLEAR of perceptions of yourself that aren’t true. Avoid suppressing the feelings so far deep within yourself because that’ll result in misery and low spirits If you choose not to deal with it when it occurs it may arise in any future conflict and take you down that same road because you didn’t realise that issues from the past that you choose to ignore always play apart in the reason why emotionally you are dysfunctional and unable to cope . They’ll only pile up 1 by 1 until it takes you by surprise and sorry to say it so bluntly but - you die before death. Therefore your left .. just a another damaged soul living in a lifeless body. That outcome there will be one that becomes permanent and make you believe that that’s just how you are , when really it’s just who you became and it felt normal to you because that’s all you’ve ever known. Be true to yourself and your emotions.

If you want to cry , CRY❗️

if you want to scream , SCREAM ❗️

If you need to have you moment of tower, DO IT. ❗️

Don’t let anyone tell you you sook too much , because all they see is the outside , they don’t feel your pain therefore they have no clue HOW MUCH silent suffering and agony you hold within. If that’s how they are going to be , leave. You deserve to be around people that will hold you during your toughest times or at least BE THERE, NOT everyone can reciprocate what you give them because they are incapable of mirroring the capacity of love you offer in a genuine unconditional sense , but don’t use that against them because everyone is very very different , recognise the effort , and appreciate it ‼️💯

THAT person is not you , it never was and you probably never even realised it.

The sad part is that for most to really be able to go through such a process of self transformation (IN AND OUT) is that you really have to sink far below to the point where it’s either too late or near almost impossible to pick yourself up again for you to realise just how far gone you were , just how broken , bruised and battered you were. It is a triggering painful confusion once you realise you don’t even know who you are as a person 💯 mentally itll have you all over the place because you were so caught up living your life in the eyes of perception of how other see you or how you wanted them to see you. You loved everyone beyond life itself that you conformed into everyone else’s shadow. They were quick to come to you , want to hang out with you , be your friend etc etc until YOU showed them that it’s okay to walk all over you.

YOU SHOWED THEM‼️not the other way around. Therefore it went from give and take to give give give.

In the long run , you gave to much of yourself to the point where you gave all of yourself and there was nothing left to share.

Sometimes when torment is inflicted by another party (person or person(s)) it’s not you at all. Sometimes if you observe closely enough you’ll come to realise that those treating you like that maybe not be doing it intentionally and with a gentle approach.They could well deep within be feeling worthless and abandoned themselves. Don’t be so quick to act , but rather to understand them better so that you are able to help in the best way that you can. You will have people genuinely not noticing their wrong and YES I completely understand the whole what goes around comes around BUT that does not mean you need to dish it out , it’s takes SO MUCH STRENGTH to heal yourself of wounds , but it’s takes EVEN MORE STRENGTH to lend a hand to even those who inflicted those , my heart is made of gold and i solely believe despite anyone’s past they deserve love. ALL the time a little compassion and love is all that’s needed to make someone see the light , and so on the other hand if they’re doing it on purpose , then you need to realise you are better than just a puppet , your purpose in life wasn’t to be a shadow. You don’t have to make a scene or start a fight but if they ask you for a favour , a simple ‘no’ will do and go about your day.

There is always 2 sides to someone’s pain , don’t approach anything in a cruel manner.

When it comes to healing as a whole , make sure not to over do it as it can drain you mentally , let it pass through you and by you with time and patience.

Moral of it all ‼️ If you feel like you have forgotten who you are and your living a life with a sense of hopelessness and uncertainties , GET OUT OF THAT ! gain the courage to take that step towards finding you.Make sure to give your all to yourself above anyone. IN THE END you’ll find that loving yourself gives you the most POWERFUL sense of freedom. When you love yourself no one can stop you from anything because you are freee! No one can walk all over you because you are sure of yourself and you know who you are and what you deserve ! In addition get to know YOU💯

Learn to appreciate your surroundings , your flaws , yours attributes , your way of living , your bright loving personality , your likes and dislikes , your boundaries , your hobbies .. YOU !

Your peace of mind matters too. once you are happy with it , you’ll become unfamiliar with the feeling of being lost and filled with positivity . Spread your positivity by helping those who you feel aren’t okay , with something as little as calling them beautiful or handsome. It does wonders and in some cases saves lives , some people are that close to giving up you never know how you could’ve changed someone’s life with a genuine act of verbal communication.

And just remember with everything you may be going on IT IS OKAY ‼️ YOU ARE GOING TO BE OKAY ‼️

Gratitude and forgiveness will forever be your biggest healers.

Once you learn to forgive you will then open your eyes to the lessons life had to teach you and that’s where gratitude comes in and you learn to truly appreciate everything for what was and now what is 🍃

Now that you’ve broken down a certain situation , it’s time to look within yourself & see the trauma within that you have yet to discover and yet to release. Walk your path and go back to the beginning of it all. When you were a child ... that’s where it all began.