Never good enough feeling

You ever just sit there and wonder what you mean to others. Including your own family . I do, I actually have for a while. Even though I know my family loves me unconditionally, there is always that pit of a feeling at the end of the day. Oh how I wish it would go away for good. Thats the thing about anxiety. It can make you depressed and there's alot of people who just doesn't understand it. The feeling of never being good enough is ways there. The feeling of failure is always there. Feelings that make you seem like your just going crazy in this world.

So many feelings and sometimes its just to much. I have always been the type of girl to say "I will never be that pretty" or "I wish I had that body ." always being left out or the last one picked. Im the girl who will probably never get married simply because i don't feel like I'm ever going to get asked. that is part of my anxiety. Of course there are people that tell me I'm beautiful and such. But some days its hard to even believe them.

Everyone thinks that people with anxiety is crazy but truth is we are not. I also have a fear of being alone. Now that can go different ways but in "alone" I mean like people just up and leaving and never seeing again. Not alone as in my son leaving me for College. People leaving has always been apart of my life. Maybe I just pick the wrong people. Alot of my anxiety i can control but sometimes just like anyone else we all have a breakdown.

We can not be strong everyday of our lives no matter how much we try to be. I am even talking about the normal people who does not deal with anxiety on a daily basis.. Everyone deserves a little breakdown. We all have to fund out what helps us deal with the situations that we have in our own way. I believe I have found my way. Talking to God has really helped me alot with my anxiety. I have found to leave it all with him and if its in my path he will help me through it. One of my favorite verses from the Bible is "Trust in the lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct the path." I've always believed in God but since I've really been talking to him have felt so much calmer inside. However, my way of coping may not be your way and that's completely fine as well.

So with all this being said and if your reading this. I hope if you know someone with anxiety. then just try to understand where they are coming from. Most of the time its nothing that no one did, its a feeling that just hits you out of nowhere. Now let me say everyone has anxiety in many different ways and everyone is different. We each as a human being have our own ways of dealing with our problems.

I just want everyone to know that I am here if anyone ever needs to talk! you can remain anonymous or you can tell me who you are. it is completely up to you.. i really hope you all continue to read my blogs as i will be creating more.. also if anyone has any pointers as in how I can get peoples attention or just do better at blogging i will definitely take them into consideration. i hope and pray that everyone has a great day 😍