My Writing Journey Begins. I Am Confused!

I asked myself, why do I write? The immediate answer was to feel better after pouring my mind onto paper. Then, I thought of publishing my writings. I have never done it, but I have flirted with the idea before.

I was hesitant. Too many questions popped up in my head when I ran the scenario of publishing an article. Self-criticism, time, marketing, and wasted effort — nothing in this world bugs me more than wasted effort does. And I am tired after all of my financial attempts. Still, I am optimistic. Despite the heartaches of lost opportunity, I am bit-by-bit giving in to the idea of the marathon. If I was wiser, I would have adopted it earlier. I did not know any better. Why should one aim low?

I think that life has kicked me in, not out. “Use what I gifted you.” Life’s message riddled my mind. I knew I could write, but my appetite to go big won, and the fear of missing out made it worse. Also, I did not think that anyone should listen to me. The world will always lack perspective, and mine is not useless. I, still, cannot present my reader with anything but my best. Thus, my ideas should be organized, and my language should convey what I mean. May patience be with me.

I insisted on mentioning money at the beginning of this story. I did this to remind myself of the urge that pushed me to change directions from business to writing. While contemplating my options, I thought that juggling my Ph.D. work — providing that I pass the entry competition next month — and building my marketing agency would be daunting and a bad idea.

Then, my heart grabbed into the pen, exhausted from the continuous neglect of my natural tendencies.

If one of my family or friends read this, they will be shocked that I favored emotions over rational planning. And I will quickly correct their view of me by saying that my understanding of humans was wrong. I do gravitate towards pragmatism. But I realized a fact. Emotions are such a significant variable in my perception and quality of life, if ignored, no plan proposed to a human being qualifies as pragmatic.

So, should I sell emotions for money? Should I process feelings to produce manifestos for people and closures for the hurt?

You are here to know the answer to my questions, answered by different people: published writers, aspiring ones, and selfish ones. Finally, I will conclude why I will be writing. Join me!

What Are My Questions?

• Why write?
• In What style?
• What about marketing?

I laid my concerns on Reddit. People were generous with their time and wrote comprehensive answers. In some cases, I asked other questions like: What books did you publish? What are your favorite genres? I would love to read their works and report on them. But not in this story. We will need to focus on our objective: to establish a basis for our writing: why write?

P.S. I would have loved to name everyone and give them credit, but Redditors are anonymous.

I am Compelled to Write

One person said, “I can’t not write.”

Another one said, “I make art because if I didn’t, I’d lose my mind.”

For some people, writing is necessary for life. Many replies expressed how internal monologs and fantastic worlds ate on their minds, and their job was to write them down. Whether readers liked the final product or not was often irrelevant.

An eloquent reply:

"Maybe my work is great, maybe it’s an insight into a mind like mine you wouldn’t otherwise get, or maybe it’s nothing aside from a useful tool for myself."

An Escape

The word escape suggests that reality is unsatisfying. I do not denote all writings as mere escapism protocols. Equally so, do not mind if I do. I learned this the hard way. Previously, I could not recognize the similarity between making worlds I would love to exist in and planning my future. I leashed my words from engraving my fantasies due to the fear of never returning from the chaos.

What a counterproductive act I have committed! As if I had any choice in creating these worlds. I was unsatisfied with my reality, motivated to build a good life, and determined to gain the needed skill and knowledge. I hindered my capabilities because I thought I could wander in other places, which, to my surprise, profited me very little. I grew indifferent towards the world even when I made some money — I just watched my investment die in front of me, hence the source of my exhaustion.

I liked this answer: “The stories live in my head, but they’re happier in a word document.”

Your stories are You. You have probably heard this before. But I want to emphasize the happiness part. You are happier in a word document: when you lay your thoughts down, clothe them in characters, and run the simulation. Voila! You became aware of your hidden desires, needs, and the epicenter of your anguish. Could you have known these otherwise? My answer is no. Therapy might help. Yours is better, faster, more sincere, and it is free. You cannot solve the problem until you know what it is.

No sales and You will Still Write

When I asked about marketing, people advised me to find my niche, try different genres, engage with my audience, and support other writers. On the other hand, even those who had multiple books published said that your work could be put down after a few pages, ignored, or could disappoint your expectations. You write anyway. None of them seemed disheartened by low views and no sales. I was not shocked — most are compelled to write. They will write as long as they live in this world.

A Redditor said,

I’m quite anxious about not being recognized at all. I think marketing plays a big role in the amount of recognition and approval a book receives, maybe a role a little too big. But talent is important as well, just as much as what you write about.

My Style is My Style

Few writers told me that they loved writing more than reading — mainly because they cannot stop spotting mistakes. Others said that they are their harsh critics.

I’m a very brutal editor, and I write a lot. I once got rid of 126,000 words (150 pages) because of one detail I changed. But it is my dream to one day get something published.

Except for a high sense of criticism, no answer was the same when it came to style. And I knew this would be the case beforehand.

The replies I received assured me of my decision to write. I did not say I was a novice writer. So, no one offered their words of encouragement. But many of them started their comments by expressing how much they liked my questions. However, there was one question off; the style one.

I foolishly asked, “What style do you prefer using? If you are not very technical about style, just express your approach.”

Some writers talked about the writing process. Others mentioned their preferred tense.

I was confused!

What confused me were the writing guides I read. I am reading Steven Pinker’s book The Sense of Style: The Thinking Person’s Guide to Writing in the 21st Century. I am yet to finish it, and I do not think I can learn from Mr. Pinker if I sprint through his book. Thus, l will be taking my time reading it. Also, I watched a couple of videos on YouTube by Diane Callahan. I think she gave good advice because it made sense to me. I felt oblivious despite that.

None of it stuck. I had nothing to compare it to, and that was the issue. I looked for technical advice, not comparative or critical discourse. I am not well-read. So far, my writings were either for selfish or Academic reasons; the latter is horrid but necessary.

All the same, I had to stop reading style guides and get working. This is why I thought of asking writers novice questions: they touched on my pain points. For now, I will adopt one Redditor’s answer: "My style is my style."

Comprehension

Making sense of life brought me to writing, but the sense of relief kept me around. The unwritten rule was to sort my thoughts abstractly until there was something to write.

I wrote none of it!

I ended up depicting my feelings and some details of the main events. That was it. I understood very little from my experiences. What a shame! My unrealized investment was collecting dust.

One kind Redditor said,

I write to make sense of it all. Life is a detriment of overbearing stimuli, whether real or not. Writing is the means of diluting it down to a digestible substance. It comes in waves for me, regardless of style. An idea gets caught in the mind and eats at me until I spew it out on paper or computer.

I agreed.

I felt like my reasons were getting more valid. I have to write. Someone else said they wrote to educate themselves and then added their thoughts to the new knowledge. I am uncomfortable about this. I cannot pretend that my thoughts have any merits unless they have aged and matured in my head. Before being shared, thoughts must be beaten well to see whether they will endure the test of change.

Money

One of the answers I got was, “[I write] to pay the bills.”

Another replier described their aspirations for high sales as paramount to satisfy the purpose of writing: to influence other people, hopefully, for the good.

I agreed as well.

I am aware of the economic conditions that govern our existence. Also, I am a fan of meritocracy: to base your judgment of people on their competence. And I favor a free market in which ideas could flow and be valued by every individual who hears of them. But corruption is scary.

look at me presume innocence!

My fear goes away for a thousand dollars per 1000 words. It was wrong to use the word scary. What I felt was not stronger than a hunch; an anticipative feeling. Perhaps, you have already sensed my extreme introspection. Trust me, I included none of it here. I left it in my journal where I was, unknowingly, pouring my anguish, which prevailed more and more as I disdained my need. I should have taken care of my mind — the entity which I knew was the crib of it all. But I wanted the money.

I live in a suppressed economy — according to the International Crisis Group and some million Algerians. This place could go bananas at any time, and I did not feel safe building anything in it. It seemed absurd, and I did not need more absurdism in my life.

Conclusion

I will not sprint. I need to move much slower; pace my effort throughout this marathon. I will write. I need to, I have to.

I read that apologetic writing is bad — that you should show your ideas clearly, so you do not have to make excuses for the difficulty of your text. However, beginner’s luck could only serve you so much — one should not think that his rookie style could slip unnoticed.

This was my first attempt at publishing something. I would appreciate your feedback in the comments.

I am not eligible for Vocals’s Partnership Program. So, I would appreciate your support. I cannot continue writing otherwise. Thank you!

My Patreon.

Crypto Donations.

Links to The Reddit Threads that contain the quoted replies:

Why do you write? : writers (reddit.com)

Why do You Write? And few other questions. : writing (reddit.com)

Are you a writer? Why do you write? : JordanPeterson (reddit.com)