Always wear your invisible crown”
Almost every woman speaks about lifting each other’s crown and it the most beautiful thing to hear, to see and realize how many women want to lift each other up. But what does it really mean to lift each other up? How do you lift someone up without degrading yourself? Well, this might be a collection of very few rhetorical questions but the reality is, these are questions that bring about thoughts and a lot of self-reflection.
Lifting up someone’s crown is great but lifting your own crown high is even greater. Not only does it give you the courage to lift others crown but it also gives you joy in watching others crown high. It says, you cannot give from an empty cup but I would also say you cannot lift someone else’s grown whilst stamping on your own. It is certain that the human nature finds it pleasant or mostly beautiful to see someone give up their self being to help another, to be self-less and while I think it partly beautiful, I also know that it important for one to pay attention to their need before wanting to be a savior to everyone. Choose to be a helper and not a savior.
Forgetting about your own needs while fulfilling other people’s need always result in the overwhelming feeling. You become drain and unable to maintain healthy relationships. And that’s when being selfish becomes important in case of your mental health.
Months back, I wouldn’t have written this because according to my nature it is good to always put others first. To rescue everyone else expect myself, to be happy even while broken so to not make my surrounding uncomfortable. It is part of my nature and personality and it has always brought some sort of satisfaction, knowing that I could care and be there for everyone. But what I didn’t realize is that this behavior was not only good for those around me but it was also damaging to my emotional well-being.
This behavior cost my emotional health and one difficult thing I had to learn during my counselling sessions was, is the ability to listen to my emotions in fact it is to listen to myself. To understand my space and know when am not in a good space, and be able to withstand the desire to be a savior to everyone else but to pay attention to myself and work toward bettering myself until I’m doing great enough to be there for others.
Learning to lift up my own crown before lifting other people’s crown brought in a lot of positive changes. I helped others without feeling guilty, I encouraged others with so much joy. Helping others while been in a good space wasn’t only good for me but also for those I helped. I was able to give them my whole attention and helped them in the best way I could instead of helping out of a guilty conscious. I have also learned to appreciate it when my friend helps me when she can and not because she has to. But because they mental health is much more important just as mine.
The only way to lift someone else’s crown without degrading your own is by understanding that your crown is important and need intentional attention. You need to watch it careful and make sure it on its right place, only then you can allow yourself to lift someone else's crown. This type of selfishness is needed and very important for one’s mental health.
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Every step of the way
It has been a long ride so far... There are no words enough to describe this path, while some might call it a winding road, others will call it a difficult path, without forgetting those who call it an unpredictable path. And while I woundn't agree any less with them, I also wont forget those who see it as a learning road, a healing journey and a procress that lead to a greater outcome.
By Keren Miteu6 years ago in Motivation
“He Kept Going When No One Was Watching — And That Changed Everything”
No one ever noticed the days he almost gave up. There were no messages asking if he was okay. No one wondered why he became quieter. No one asked how much effort it took just to keep going. To the world, he was just another ordinary man. His name was Ayaan. Ayaan’s life didn’t collapse in one dramatic moment. It slowly faded. Missed opportunities. Rejected ideas. Silent disappointments. Every failure was small, but together they became heavy. He had dreams once. Big ones. Dreams that kept him awake at night, imagining a future where his hard work would finally matter. But over time, those dreams began to feel unrealistic—almost embarrassing. People around him seemed to move forward effortlessly. They celebrated promotions, achievements, and milestones. Ayaan watched from the side, smiling politely while feeling invisible. At work, his efforts were ignored. Among friends, his voice faded. At home, expectations weighed heavily on him. Slowly, a dangerous thought settled into his mind: “Maybe I’m not good enough.” That thought followed him everywhere. It followed him on crowded buses. It followed him into sleepless nights. It followed him every time he tried again and failed. One night, after scrolling through endless success stories online, Ayaan closed his phone and stared at the dark ceiling. His chest felt tight, not because of pain—but because of exhaustion. He whispered quietly, “How long do I keep trying?” There was no answer. But that night, Ayaan made a decision—not a loud one, not a confident one. A tired decision. He decided to keep going, even if nothing changed. The next morning felt the same. The same routine. The same doubts. The same fear of wasting his life. But Ayaan showed up anyway. He worked when no one praised him. He studied when no one guided him. He practiced when no one believed in him. Some days, motivation disappeared completely. On those days, discipline took over. He reminded himself: “I don’t need applause. I need progress.” Weeks passed. Nothing dramatic happened. No sudden success. No recognition. No miracle. But something subtle began to shift. Ayaan became calmer under pressure. He learned to sit with discomfort instead of running from it. He stopped comparing his journey to others. The silence that once scared him now became his training ground. Months later, a serious problem appeared at his workplace. It was complicated, risky, and easy to blame on someone else. Most people avoided it. Some pretended it wasn’t their responsibility. Ayaan didn’t announce himself. He didn’t seek attention. He simply started working. Late nights. Mistakes. Corrections. Learning. There were moments he wanted to quit. Moments when fear whispered, “You’re not ready.” But he answered back, “I’ll learn.” Slowly, the problem began to disappear. Not perfectly—but steadily. People noticed, quietly. One afternoon, his manager called him into the office. Ayaan expected criticism. Instead, he heard a question that stunned him: “Where did you learn all this?” Ayaan paused. How could he explain years of silent effort? How could he explain working when no one cared? He simply replied, “I kept going.” That moment didn’t change his life overnight. He didn’t become famous. He didn’t suddenly become successful. But it changed something far more important. His belief in himself. For the first time, Ayaan understood that life doesn’t always reward effort immediately. Sometimes, it watches. It watches who continues without praise. Who improves without recognition. Who grows in silence. Years later, Ayaan looked back at the version of himself who almost quit. The man who felt invisible. The man who thought no one was watching. And he smiled. Because he finally understood the truth: Life was always watching. Not to judge. Not to rush. But to see if he would keep going when it was hardest. The world doesn’t reward those who only work when they’re seen. It rewards those who build strength in silence. And sometimes, the moment that changes everything doesn’t come with applause. It comes quietly. After patience. After effort. After consistency. That is when everything finally begins to change. Final Message Keep going—even when no one is watching. Especially then.
By Inayat khan2 days ago in Motivation
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