I want to be FEARLESS in 2021

I want to be fearless in 2021.

2020 was the year of regrets. Stuck in my home because of the pandemic, trying to figure out what to do about my future, I experienced intense waves of regret about all the things I had wanted to do for myself but never did. A whole lot of Should’a, Would’a, Could’a.

I should have started making yoga videos. I should have started my blog. I should have focused on song-writing and music production. I should have traveled. I should have saved money. I should have bought musical instruments and gear instead of clothes. The list is long.

This year, I have resurrected many of my dreams and goals, reminding myself that it is never too late. To help me move forward, I have had to think about what stopped me in the first place.

My obstacles might sound familiar. I wasn’t skinny enough. I wasn’t capable. I didn’t know enough. I wasn’t experienced enough. I didn’t want to be judged. I listened to people who were NOT in my corner, who did NOT have my best interests at heart. I was afraid of failing. I was too scared.

The truth is that I looked just fine. I was immensely capable. I had plenty of experience. A bit of positive criticism would have been a good thing. Failing is essential in figuring out how to succeed. There were plenty of people out there that believed in me and encouraged me. I listened to the wrong people because they validated what I thought about myself. I was just too scared.

The things that I was worried about seem like nonsense to me now. I spent a significant part of 2020 thinking about the could-have-beens. I barely took joy in all the things that I had accomplished. The happiest moments of last year were spent doing what I loved: making music, teaching yoga and connecting with people.

By the end of 2020, I knew it was time to really dig in. To expand my yoga offerings, learn more about writing songs and producing music, start writing and save money for music, travel, and anything else that I might need. Most importantly, it was time to fully believe in myself, to know myself as expert, capable, accomplished and fearless.

I do not want Should’a, Would’a, Could’a to be the story of my life.

My intention for 2021 and beyond is to be FEARLESS. To live, think and do what I love with courage and confidence, regardless of the nay-sayers, especially the ones in my head.

The Choy