I Met a Crazy Old Lady...

I did it! Survived my first 40 years of childhood!! Hip hip HurYayyy!!!

This is an especially exciting birthday as a few years ago, out on a morning stroll, I happened upon a wild and wondrous front yard full of bright yellow dandelions and their silver haired wish mothers, dancing in the breeze, just begging me to make a momentous wish! Nestled in their tall grasses full of all kinds of flower and creature friends, was a wooden rocking chair painted white. Suddenly, I had a vision of a delighted old woman, rocking back and forth, enjoying her yard's evolving dance of color and growth. Imagining her there, next door to so many fields of green, made me chuckle at the thought of being so free...

And that's when I made my 40th birthday wish, on a whole yard full of dandelions!!! I wished that by the time I was 40 I'd be a crazy ol lady…

Now, what I mean by 'crazy' is the kind of colorful human some people might look at and flinch, scowl, run from or, like me, run towards like a dandelion reaches for the sun! Unconcerned for the status quo, perhaps she walks barefoot in the snow, wears bells in her hair, flirts with just about anyone including the deer in her lawn, dances and sings to her favorite tunes while grocery shopping, or decides this week she will wear nothing but periwinkle blue. In all my years I’ve known more than a few, and even some lucky Janes and Joes who managed to flaunt their wild and wacky wonderful long before their faces pruned with permission.

I wanted to be one of them. Sure I’d been out of the wacky closet for quite some time, but not without day terrors, inner flinches, and countless hours of agonizing over how someone might have been offended by my very existence. Dealing with this neurosis had been quite the comedy over the years, literally. In my mid 20’s I enrolled in a clown arts class, not because I wanted to perform the stage or streets, or goddess forbid birthday parties!

But because at the age of 10, after hitting my breaking point of psychological distress, I remember very distinctly the day my inner clown went on vacation. That part of me who could take my blues to play and sew up wounds in the blink of a paintbrush, was nowhere to be found. Luckily that class was the start of a beautiful bouquet of fellowly foolish friends, and I rarely had to work my humility muscle alone. Together we remember the genius of our untamed inner children, how to play our way through this precious yet messy human life.

One such friend, dear Beth here, knowing of my big 40th birthday wish nearing fruition, made me this amazing crazy ol lady hat and together we adorned ourselves for our very own Dandelion Pride Day Parade at the Eugene, Oregon farmer’s Market.

That night we danced wildly in my living room singing along to karaoke tunes before hosting an improv puppet show for our house full of other fun weirdos.

Now, what might you ask happened on my 40th birthday to those inner grumpy ol self-critic gremlins? Well they resigned of course, joined the great exodus of 2021 due to uninspiring work conditions. My dandelion friends lived up to their miraculous wish granting reputation and seeded me heart, mind and soul with an incredibly potent vision. Now, whenever I get a knock on the door from one of those goblins seeking respite, I smile and wave then hand them a bright yellow dandelion and wish them a very merry day. Today my wacky dandelioohna seeds are all the way free to roam the world without fear of being shouted at or stomped out by silly anti authenticity establishments! Woot Woot! And now that my big birthday wish has come true, next time I get a chance to make a wish on a magical dome of bliss, I'll make the same free your wacky wonderful weird, especially from those inner goblins, wish for you!!! And if you've read this far and want to play a fun new birthday game with me (pretty please!), complete these sentences in your own wacky way and share them with me: I met an old lady who_______ . I don't know why she_______. Perhaps she'll _______!

I'll start:

I met an old lady who let all the little lost dandelions take root in her yard. She so loved their golden glow, how even on a grey cold day, they filled her heart with sun. Over the years they got bigger and brighter. Many children delighted in them as well, and made lots of wishes on their seedy night caps. Butterflies and bumblebees were overjoyed by their presence too! Soon, the soil, tickled by those strong dandelion roots, made room for other wild n wonderful flowers and plants to bloom! And all kinds of critters big and small were nourished by them. The neighbors were originally quite angry with the old lady, for long ago, some silly small voice told them that dandelions and the like were nasty ol weeds! Her dandelions might try to spread into their yard, they'd have to go bankrupt on poisons!!! Green was the only way to be!...But over the years, as the old lady rocked happily in her glorious front yard, smiling and waving at all who passed by, scowling or not, little by little, hearts started to soften...I don't know why she let those little lost dandelions take root in her yard. But perhaps she'll start a wild and wonderful front yard revolution! And someday we'll all be smiling and waving at each other a whole lot more, no matter how grey the day, or the soul before us...