I Am Tired Of Being The Forgiving One!

What Is Forgiveness?

Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness.

Listening to a conversation between two individuals, the female said, sitting on the rim of pain, “Why must I be the one always forgiving everyone for what was done to me after I give them so much of myself with kindness and love?”

She asked a question that my heart has been pondering all of my life. I am easy to forgive anyone for their cruelty to me. I must, because the pain of their cruelty eats at me from the inside, throwing me off focus and course. The pain disables my creative, innovative abilities, and I end up failing at everything I do, in pain, resentment, and regret.

Yes, forgiving someone actually cleans my heart.

I do it to move on, because life won’t wait on me, neither will my problems, the pain of the cruelty done to me, nor any feelings of resentment. #Iintend2survive, so I must forgive you. I believe if I don’t, then I allow you to win. Then the pain of what was done to me will be the tool that will enable me to self-destruct.

A very close family member, whom I give all of my heart to, said, “Why don’t you go and get a job, don’t you see that your books are going nowhere?”

Those words are coming from someone whom I have given many lifelines to. It was like someone using a power saw to remove each of my limbs, while I was alive, staring into my eyes. That kind of pain never leaves, but with forgiveness, it will slowly ease away.

When you are kind, thoughtful, understanding, loving, considerate, with the intention to save the world, possessing all of the good qualities that religions demand of us, the pain of their cruelty and thoughtlessness is what we reap back. Then we complain that life isn’t fair. Life is fair because I learned vital life lessons from their cruelty, which has taught me to use common sense more often. Then life pays them back for their cruelty towards me and you.

What would you rather get, life lessons or cruelty?

They say you can’t plant corn and reap peas. They are wrong. Many of us plant roses with kindness and reap weeds in pain.

Because to a heart that is ignorant of the value of love and kindness, being who you are tells them you are stupid and weak. But life pays us back without bias. So, for me, life hands me wisdom, strength, and common sense, showing me how to win these trials and tests Satan/Some Humans use as a weapon to destroy me, after taking my kindness.

Forgiveness is one of the tools I use to remove regrets from my heart after lessons learned. Every human who returns cruelty for the kindness they took is telling me something important about themselves. They are unaware that they are providing me with the best resources to make better decisions in the future. They are unaware that their lives, actions, choices, and decisions are my manual.

Mind-reading isn’t as hard as many of us think.

So, yes, be the forgiving one and clean your heart, and the regrets will go away, allowing prosperity, peace, and love to flourish in your life and everything you do.

A cleaner heart can see life as it unfolds in every direction with understanding, kindness, love, and wisdom of life and living. Annelise Lords

Thank you for reading this piece. I hope you enjoyed.