Holding Yourself Accountable is the Cheat Code to Life.

It seems like everyone is living in a state of heightened sensitivity without actually understanding why they are sensitive. It seems like everyone would rather be glued to their phones, scrolling through the latest unnecessary news, which then instills unnecessary fear. Some of you then go to a job you worked hard to obtain to gain status in your community, gain that six figure paycheck, only to be let down when you finally realize it was not worth the sleepless nights, the long commute, and the constant headaches. So now that you are overstimulated with the exaggerated news, the pressure of a looming deadline at work, what do you do?

You unwind of course.

You could take it out on your innocent children, vent to your wife, take the first of many drinks for the evening, binge the latest show on Netflix, or put some oils in a diffuser in an effort to "calm" you. Society calls this destructive behaviour self-care. Society tells you it is okay to vent when you are upset, bully your children because they are your property, and numb yourself with products that only put a dent in your wallet, all in the name of self-care.

Self-care has lost its meaning.

What was meant to be a tool for healthy relaxation after a long, hard week or day is now being used as a form of escape. A lot of you would rather put the negative feelings out of your minds, hearts, and bodies than actually try to sit with the feelings and try to figure out where it came from. Again, for a lot of you, you know where those bad feelings are coming from. A lot of these feelings are coming from self-inflicted wounds. A lot of you do not need to pray to God, Allah, Buddha, look at tarot cards, or look into a crystal ball to know that your life is not where you sincerely want it to be. Are you happy with how unknowledgeable you really are, but upset others with your obnoxious narcissistic tendencies? Did you snort, inject, or smoke too much drugs this week? How is your bank account? Is your money going towards things that sustain you or is it going towards things that only give you short-term relief but only put you in financial or emotional debt in the long run? Did you exercise like you said you would? Did you start that new side passion project that in a few years could help you escape your job?

Yes, you are lazy.

The koala bear isn't lazy. It just instinctively knew its purpose, which is to eat eucalyptus. As a human, you are so much more than an animal that relies on instincts. We use two thumbs on a daily basis and that is incredible considering most mammals are made with four fingers. This was unthinkable thousands of years ago. Unfortunately, you have abused this body part so much that it made you lazy and dumb. When a lot of you were younger it took a lot of effort to look for information. You hunted for information. Remember the library? Remember looking through the encyclopedia to start that science project? You needed yellow pages to look up a car rental place. You needed to buy a roadmap from the gas station to plan out your road adventure. Now instead of using your thumbs to start a business online, start reading a new kindle book, or starting a youtube channel, you are using your thumbs to find the next video on Tik Tok. You are using your thumbs to type into Google.com to figure out what the weather would be like today. From there you are searching for the latest celebrity drama. It causes you to stop thinking about what you are going to cook. You can just order in. You won't even walk across the room to set up your alarm anymore.

Reflect Deeply.

Taking accountability requires intentional thought. Here is a simple process and it's going to be painful for a lot of you. Go to the bathroom mirror after reading this article. Clean off the toothpaste stains. Really look at yourself and do not look away. Look at all the things you could have been doing, but put them in the back of your mind. It requires you to remember to look at all the good things you could have been doing because you are afraid. You escape the hard work of being in a relationship because working hard at understanding and compromising is not something you feel you need to do. It's not you, it's them. You escape the hard reality that your friendships fail because you take advantage of your friends who finally wise up and leave. But it's never you, right? It's always them. You could not pay for that class. You just could not find the time, even though you spend hours on Netflix after work five to seven days a week. There is just no time.

Welcome to being hard on yourself.

You need to strategically critique yourself. Think about why you have not done the things you said you were going to do. Why have you not downloaded that dating app? Why have you not gone back to therapy? Why have you not taken that chemistry or that knitting class? Why have you not done any of the things that will ultimately make your life better? From there, tell yourself you will aim to be 1% better every day. Go on that date and gain experience as to what you will and will not tolerate from a life partner. Call your doctor and get them to send another referral to a psychiatrist. Sign up for that class, and attend that class whether it is online or in person. Prioritize the friends that have the same hard-working, yet dream-driven mindset as you. Identify all the bad habits that keep you farther away from you really are.

Always remember that it is a universal fact that we are all going to die. A lot of us are not going to make it to old age. Some of us are going to get shot. Some of us are going to get into a car accident. Some of us will take our last glass of vodka before we have a seizure and die. How do you want to be remembered? The person that tried to set themselves apart from the rest, or the person who sat there and wondered, what if?

Be accountable and make changes. It could be the start of the rest of your life.