Here's to Being Happy

As an opportunity slips through your fingers, it is often easy to forget the many others sitting just beside you, waiting to be taken. 2020 had these opportunities passed through many hands, and as the new year calls an end to its first month, I am finally grasping hold and taking strides for the future.

Having struggled with mental health since a young age, every year I have told myself I would make a change but have always done very little to achieve this outcome. Already this year I’m working on my physical wellbeing through sports, signing up with my local football team and training twice a week. I’m building friendships with people on the team, dedicating time towards something besides my job, and feeling like I’m making a difference.

Since graduating from school and becoming an adult, besides enrolling in university, all I’ve done is work, never really sure what to do with my money. This year I wanted to change that, already opening two dedicated saving accounts, working towards having enough for a house deposit. Even at my simple retail job, I’ve put my name out, gaining myself a promotion into management, getting a pay rise and saving more than ever.

2020 I got engaged, 2021 is the year I organise the wedding – even if it won’t be for a while with the current health situation. A month in and I’ve made my own wedding invitations, reached out to multiple venues for information, and evenly dividing my savings between house and wedding. This year is the year I grow up and take a grasp on life, and learn how to care for number one. This is the year I stay happy.

This year I will meet the goals I have set for saving, and I will exceed them. I will continue to rise at work, and I will keep playing football. When my head won’t listen I will seek help, and I will strengthen my relationships with those closest to me. This is the year I take control.

To achieve these goals, resolutions, I have made changes and will need to keep evolving them. From little things like spending less money on non-essentials to big lifestyle changes. Instead of eating out, I’ve started cooking nine out of ten nights for my partner and me, filing the money I would’ve wasted on junk straight into saving – not to mention packing lunches for work. I want to be fit for football, so I’m going for morning runs and eating bigger meals.

Coming into 2021, my biggest goal was to get my provisional driver’s license. As of January 12th, I have achieved this, cutting painful waits for public transport and expensive taxi and uber trips. I feel so elevated, having so many things come together so soon into the year, pushing me to want more and more.

Not every one of my achievements come off the back of good things, however. With university classes going online last year, as with most things I can’t handle, I simply decided to give it up. Out of all my mistakes in 2020, this was probably the one I regretted the most, and one of my biggest motivations for doing better in 2021.

I’ve always been a quitter. I pick something up, and I put it back down the next day. Opportunities pass through my hands, and I let them. Then I regret it. I regret it so much, I don’t see the other possibilities just beside me, waiting to be taken. I see, I grab, it slips, I watch, and I don’t move on. University I saw, and I grabbed hold so, so tightly, yet dropped it at the first slip, afraid of the possibility of slipping down a never-ending slope. But instead of watching it float away, wondering what could have been, I happened to take a little look to my left and see what I had been missing out on.

I always thought my mental health was why I missed out on so much, but now I see missing out was what really stopped me from seeing the world around me. What made my mental insecurities rule so much of my life.

Having issues mentally will always set things back, however, 2021 is the year they don’t stop me. All these lifestyle changes, goals, achievements and regrets, those mentioned and those well into my past are not necessarily set in stone. Nothing is, but I’d like to think they’ve made me happier today. I’d like to think I’ll be happier still tomorrow. Down days happen to everyone, but 2021 is the year I stop letting setbacks hold me in place. With or without these changes, 2021 is the year I strive for the future, and the year I can finally say I’m happy.

So here’s to being happy. To taking on new challenges and looking at new opportunities.

I may be a little late, but here’s to 2021; Happy New Year!