FRESH START!

The end of last year, I impulsively decided a big change in my life. I booked a flight and gave myself just enough time to notify my real estate agent that I would be leaving in 2 weeks' time. I decided to leave the hustle of Sydney and moved to a quiet town around Launceston. I took a leap of faith with the minimal saving I had left (thanks to joblessness during Covid). A very fresh start indeed!

My resolutions hardly ever revolve around fitness for I believe, physically, I am fit. I look a little heavier but boy do I have a well balanced BMI! I do not have a sedentary lifestyle and nor do I have unhealthy eating habits. I consume home-made food not because I am a fitness freak but because frequently spending money for food outside can cause a serious dent in my bank balance and I do not want that.

So this year, my resolution was to achieve is a little more self confidence in myself. It is easy to blame my Asian upbringing that taught me to be extremely modest and humble to the point that I have forgotten that it is okay to admit that I am better at something. I have this mindset that every one else is better than me. I am often scared to apply for new jobs because I constantly feel like I am not competent enough even though I know that I meet all requirements listed in the job vacancy.

I take pride in being a pessimist because I believe hoping anything good will happen will actually jinx it. Looking back, I feel like I made it a habit to look at the worst case scenario for everything so that if even a tiny bit good thing happened in life, that would make me happy. No longer! This year, my resolution is to acknowledge and celebrate my achievements- no matter how small they seem to be.

I have been applying for positions that scare me- because of my resolution. Last week, I landed a full-time job! The first full time job of my life. Things are looking good. Since I got the job, I bought a car with the minimal saving I had.

Just a month into 2021 and it has already started to look perfect to the point that I can not help but think about how I might jinx everything.

So far, I have barely been surviving. This year I am gonna live

This year, I want to love myself a little too much.