Embracing the Reality

It feels like getting that perfect dream job is the second of years and decades worth career path, of intense ambition. The happy tears flow as the offer letter is opened with anticipation, excitement fills every corner of your being and dreams appear limitless. As soon as I got the job that, up until then was my dream position… everything fell into place. So there I was, eager as hell because this job was part of a really good company in my field and just knowing that would make the flood of congratulations from friends and family *only* more bearable to endure. But when the dust had settled, I realized that this dream job was much more difficult and complex than I envisioned in my mind.

The beginning was awesome. I was excited to come in and add value on previous significant projects given the high-profile position I stepped into. The glossy brochures and marketing had created an image of a bustling, dynamic office where imaginations ran wild engaging in swashbuckling ideas stifled only by shining peaks still waiting to be summited. That buzz fizzled in the face of what ended up being a very stressful job.

First, there was the immense amount of work. The job ended up being more than 50 hours a week. The dream opportunity turned into a nightmare marathon of nights and weekends trying to catch up. There was a lot of pressure to perform. I was then under tight deadlines and loads of work with increased pressure than anyone could handle to the level I ended up living in stress fatigue!

It took an emotional toll on us, another unanticipated hill. I had imagined a position where I would arrive and just be able to create new projects, that my name was known for itself. Instead, I landed in a results-oriented culture. The obsessive concentration into the mechanics of doing well always required a sacrifice on physical health. Always working and prone to burnout, always trying not to be seen as weak or inferior.

I had also not been given a bootcamp in office politics. And the glossy brochures and recruitment pitches never talked about rivalries, power plays, or how complex workplace relationships could be. I got caught in a messy political spiderweb where I had to be very deliberate about how I moved and who sided with me against the other. Balancing relationships to navigate and interpret the undercurrents that swayed decisions every single day was a constant struggle.

This is when my good (fake) friend Imposter syndrome joined the party. While the knowledge and skill set were certainly there, I frequently perceived situations as an impostor who had managed to squeeze past security. The fears of fraud increased by the side eyes and in all brutal truth, how cutthroat EVERYTHING is. It manifested my self-doubt and negatively impact how I was viewing myself in terms of embracing the role or celebrating some success.

I found it impossible to maintain a work-life balance. Work started leaking into personal time, and weaving itself throughout the weekend. I would often catch myself thinking about my work outside of modifying or even when I was supposed to be off the clock. The result was burnout and an increasing separation from what excited me professionally outside of my professional life. The things that used to bring me such joy in my life now felt so far away.

However, through the challenge there were lessons. I saw each obstacle as a chance to better myself and my business. Setting boundaries was so important. I began to put myself first, and I found different ways to decompress outside of work. I found my old hobbies back, and I was able to have time with the people that matter most in my life.

It also helped me to learn some important lessons on resisting setbacks. I also began to lean into the job being a place of learning and growth for me — instead, I started looking at my experiences in this space as more valuable opportunities than simply something that validates with external sources. I found myself questioning my limitations, values and gained a new perspective on success.

Probably the biggest realization: a dream job is often not as perfect once you get under it's hood. The vision of a perfect position fails to encompass the complexities and problems that arise from this idealized version role. Success is definitely not to be found at the top of a tree; it's also about fitting in, settling down and being happy. In fact, the realest thing about a dream job is less to do with the role and more on what it makes of you (still so punny).

When you feel lost in the divide between your ideal dream job and it's actual reality — know getting there is half the fun. Accept these challenges and treat them as chances to evolve. Every obstacle you deal with is also one closer to better understanding and strength. A real dream job is not about everything being perfect but what makes you grow and gives balance in your life.

In the end, my dream job wasn't as perfect a picture I had imagined. But it was one big chapter of my personal development (and specifically, of becoming a professional). It molded my view of success and showed me how the journey matters more than the destination. It was a reminder to me that every obstacle you come across is truly an opportunity for growth and resilience is inevitably required in order to be fulfilled fully.