Diary of a wimpy poet

Dear Diary,

I know you don't really exist, I know I don't really keep a daily journal, despite the recommendations of just about every 'creative writing' pundit. I know you are only an imaginary diary, a pretend friend, but I am going to address you thus in any case. Get over it!

This pretend diary plots my trials and tribulations as a brand new poet. A new kid on the block if you will. Well, okay, ‘kid’ is stretching it a little for someone who is 65 years old. A bit late in life to start writing poetry? Maybe. Then again, is it ever too late? Given my somewhat hesitant approach to poetry, the title "wimpy" seems apposite.

Jan 1st 2024

New year's day, Yay! A whole day off work and a whole new year ahead. As I wake, full of writerly plans for the year ahead, I am determined upon setting myself writing goals for the coming twelve month....

Ha ha ha!

Only in imaginary Writerland will that ever happen... I don't do writing goals. And on January first 2024, as I awake, my first concern is to tend my hangover. Not because I have been to a big new-year celebration (didn't get invited to any) but because I wake with a hangover most days!

January 10

This writer’s year begins in earnest with the start of Vocal’s first poetic challenge: Abecedarian.

I can’t think of a better start. No, not to the year, to a poem. As a wimpy poet, I need all the help I can get. For this challenge, all I have to do is think of a word that begins with 'A' and then write a line starting with that word. Even I can do that.

A is for… Arthur (the once and future king Arthur). That was easy. If A is for Arthur, B is for…. Well, we can come back to that one later. C must be for Camelot. Then there’s G for Gawain, K is for, well Kay of course. Half the cast already. Could be tricky when I get to X, Y, Z though. Only word I can think of starting with X is xanthous and I don’t even know what that means. Hang on, I’ll check.

Ahah! After a quick dictionary check it turns out to mean 'golden' or 'fair' Looks like I will have to make Queen Guinevere a blond, which is not beyond the realms of possibility, despite Arthurian era ladies being mostly dark-haired pre-Saxon Britons. And lo, a quick image search and there appears a picture of a very blond Guinevere too.

January 12

Wonderful news! Just won a TS. My first for a poem: Abecedarian Arthurian

Looks like the ABC approach did the trick.

January 15

Another challenge. This one unofficial. The wonderful Real Poetic asks us to: Write a poem predicting the year 2033

Hmmm... tricky. Not sure where to go with this one but reading Lamar Wiggins gives me some food for thought. Thanks my friend, for:

The Trojans are coming!

January 23

Took a while, but eventually came up with some ideas and submitted:

Last year this year

Though not an unofficial prize winner, Real Poetic did give me a tip. How delightful. More importantly, she commented: "I think you’re an amazing poet! This has a great flow and meaning! Well done." I am so grateful to Lamar and Real Poetic for their inspiration and encouragement.

January 28

Emboldened out of wimpiness by the TS and other positive reception of my January poetic musings, I thought to have another go at the ABC challenge with: Arcadian rhythm Also gives me the chance to make use of one of my landscape photos, though the setting is London (a very green and pleasant city) not countryside. Guess nobody will notice. Great opportunity to reuse the xanthic word too (nothing like a bit of recycling) and a quick look in the dictionary gives me a fine finish with windy word Zephyr. A to Z, as easy as one two three… or however the MJ song goes.

February 15

This writer's noggin none too focussed on poetic musings of late. Instead, I have hit upon a 250-word murder mystery flash fiction. I think I like writing in the detective genre more than any other. Who cares about poetry anyway? Written for the Vocal Snow Micro challenge, in the first person, thus releasing my inner detective… or inner killer, depending which way it goes.

Telltale crimson trail

February 19

I kinda like the Crimson Trail story and a couple of people have said they would like to see more. Perhaps I should write a book or series based on this starter...

Crimson trail 2

March 5

Snacktime Sonata challenge announced on Vocal."Write a poem about your most beloved childhood snack." I truly hate some of these Vocal challenges. I have no recollection of childhood snacks and even if I did, am not in the least bit inspired by this contest. Don't think I'll bother.

March 21

Chips! Of course! Why didn't I think of this before? I have strong memories of going to fish 'n' chip shops as a boy, and ordering the least-cost item on the menu: a bag of chips. What better way to spend sixpence? That's it...

… Bashed the verse out and published:

Cheap as chips

Not only has the memory provided some inspiration, it also allows me to lay to rest a ghost. That story can wait until another day.

April 15

Ever on the lookout for other people’s ideas to steal, I am endeavouring to construct a poem around a Shakespearean sonnet. Why not? The bastard’s work is way out of copyright and never fails to impress.

Can't think of anything to base the sonnet on, despite the lubricating affect of a whisky (or three)...

And so to bed...

April 18

What's this? A new unofficial challenge from the immeasurable Babs Iverson. The challenge: 'Write a poem/lyrics to my prompt, "Ask me in December." '

Oh joy! Another chance to piggyback on someone else’s ideas. What rhymes with December? Well 'remember' will do for a start. Or 'dismember', or cisgender...

Think I will stick to the first idea.

Ask me in December

May 13

Poemosaurus Rex? I quite like the idea of a dinosaur poem. I could write about each of my childhood favourites starting with the triceratops. I think I might try a Limerick.

Lovestruck Triceratops

Not sure if this one works. Will have another go, perhaps featuring a stegosaurus.

May 14

If not a Limerick, what else? A sonnet? Yeah, and a great opportunity to rip-off the Bard, as I mentioned earlier.

Stegosaur Sonnet

Now that wasn’t too painful, was it? Must try this again some time.

May 15

Enough of the veggiesauruses. My next attempt must surely be about a meat-eating carnivore. Yeah, yeah, I know that's a tautology, smart-arse. This is a diary not an English Lit essay.

Given Tyrannosaurus's killer rep, I think a bit of rehabilitation is in order.

Tyrannosaurus

June 5

This new dialogue poetry challenge is a nightmare. Can’t think of anyone to have a dialogue with, and how the hell am I supposed to figure a conversation into verse?

June 10

Still can’t come up with anything for the Dialogue challenge. Maybe I should just get two poets to have a chat. Wait a minute? How about Billy boy and… and… who? Why, Burns of course, you idiot. Why didn’t we think of that before. I could get away with copying and pasting selected words of the brother bards and just fill in the gaps.

June 12

Yes! Done it at last! (Must stop over-using those dog dicks!!!) And here it is:

If music be the feud

Might even add my study notes as a separate story. Seems writing about writing is often more successful than the writing itself.

June 19

At last, got that nightmare short story written... The one about the nightmare.

Stranger on the shore

Now I can get back to some serious verse.

June 26

Heard a bit of a song on the radio. Wrote down a line (probably none too accurately) and thought it might make a nice poem. Just to show I can write poetry without a Vocal challenge. Never win the damn things anyway.

June 30

Had some really kind and flattering comments posted about I'm in Love... These sort of positive remarks really do help to encourage me to do more poetry.

July 4

Too busy helping out on Election Day to write any poetry. Or for that matter to update this imaginary diary. Didn't get home till 6am...

July 12

Summer in full swing and the Wimpy Poet's thoughts turn to... well, poetry of course. I wonder if I have enough poems now, to put together a collection…

July 20th

No time for diarying. Gotta poetry book to get out.

September 2

Finished and published the book, then posted the 'interview.' Sorry poetry buffs, I just can't take my poetic work seriously so have to introduce the work in a humourous way. Hope it works.

September 21

Dear pretend diary,

Sorry not to have updated you much of late. Been busy doing life. Not to mention writing poetry.

October 10

Another few weeks gone by without any entries... what can I say?

November 12

Frosted Verse. Just one more poetry challenge to have a bash at. Another problematic one but it's always worth having a go. Isn't it?

November 16

Woke up with a slight hangover (not unusual) but the day soon improved. A former colleague has just published a book, which I commented on in another social media space. My comment was reposted by a few others, resulting in 1,000 views by evening. If only I could get that many for any of Vocal stuff. I could have earned the princely sum of $6, rather than just a bunch of thumbs-up emoticons.

Had a good walk this morning, a great karate session, and popped into the local gym/pool club to enquire about membership. Turns out they discount for over 60s so I will give it a go. If I swim or gym at least once a week I will be getting my money's worth. Will also give me a great place to head for when I need a walk, rather than just going around in circles as I usually end up doing.

Later, I stopped off at a local café for a late breakfast, all of which made today very positive. I'm hoping to use this mood boost to make some more progress with my poetry and other writing. I'll also try to finish off this...

My submission for the "Year's Lessons" challenge

Thanks for reading my pretend diary

Echoes of the Year's Lessons

Reflect on the past year and share a story that reveals a profound lesson or insight that stayed with you.

So much for reflection, as indicated in my pseudo-diary above, along with some of my poetry writing highlights of the year.

Profound lesson: Here's one I have learnt this year:

Despite my misgivings, I really can write poetry, if I try and with the right inspiration and support. For this, I can only thank the Vocal team and all my friends and fellow writers who have taken the time to read and comment on my various poetic work over the past year.

Thank you

Insight: Well, when it comes to writing poetry (which I still struggle to understand sometimes) what helps me the most is structure. By this I mean a starting point, framework, or foundation to build my verse on. It can be a format, like a Limerick or abecedarian. Or it can be a rhyming pattern or rhythm. Or it could just be a simple word or picture prompt or some everyday experience. Once I have started, I may well depart from convention but I have to start somewhere, right?

In 2024, I started my poetry adventure in earnest.

Where to next?