Are You Actually Focused On What You Do Want?

Today's blog entry once again comes off the back of having watched a short video on Facebook, this time by motivational speaker Rob Dial. It revolved around our thought patterns and what we actually choose to focus on, which ultimately then dictates our mood, our emotions, our behavior, and even our decision making. Now it may seem like this is yet another blog entry about the same old, same old, that I normally speak about, regarding our mindset and positive thinking, which is vitally important as it is let me add, but this message is slightly different. The message that Rob delivered actually got me thinking about my own personal mindset, and what I have been allowing myself to think about, which has ultimately been the contributing factor to why I often feel so stressed, frustrated, depressed, and anxious .The message is all summed up in just question, that being "are you actually focused on what you do want to happen in your life, or what you don't want to happen?" When you actually pause for a moment to think about all the thoughts that run through your head throughout the day, and then marry them up to the emotions you feel, or even the way in which you react to them, quite often it's as a result of negative forward thinking. Now what I mean by that is we have, for so long, allowed our minds to focus on potential outcomes in the future, but the downside to this is that we focus on what we don't want to happen rather than what we do. It's just typical human nature that we always focus on the negatives in life, and we do so because the negatives have the potential to impact on our survival and the way in which we live, but this negative way of thinking is also what often leads us to creating those exact results we don't want.

Naturally, we never want to enter into a situation or circumstances which place our life in danger, but when we break down all what we think about during the day, how often do we actually face decisions and potential circumstances that have the serious potential to end our life? It's very rare. So this means that our forward thinking is instead focused on situations and circumstances that have the ability to negatively impact our way of life. Our way of life is basically our routine, our daily schedule, and a lifestyle that we are accustomed to, and comfortable with. We feel in control, we feel knowledgeable, and we feel safe, and even though we may not necessarily be happy or satisfied with some aspects in how we live our life, we at least feel content. It's only common to not want distractions or inconveniences, that disrupt the way in which we live, because we are indeed comfortable as things are. We also know too well that life has a habit of continually throwing curveballs at us, and there are many times in which we have to take action to defend and preserve the way in which we live. Not only do we have life throw these curveballs at us, from out of the blue, but we also find that when we desire something, such as the achievement of a goal, success, wealth, or even happiness, we are required to make changes and sacrifices, and take risks, if we want to achieve such rewards, which also impact on the way in which we normally live our life. When confronted with this prospect, what of course happens? We become scared, fearful, and concerned. Why? Because we immediately focus on all the things that could possibly go wrong. What if we fail? What if we lose financially? What if other people start judging us and criticizing us? What if we embarrass ourselves? What if we end up being in an even worse situation than what we are in right now? The focus is all around the negative possibility of the outcome, so much so, that it scares us off from pursuing what we desire.

Life can be so stressful and overwhelming, as there is so much we need to focus on and action. From our career, to our relationship, to our family, to our finances, to our health, to our wellbeing, to our lifestyle, to our home, you name it, there's so much to manage and maintain. We struggle for time, we concern ourselves over deadlines, and we panic. It might be the constant worry of how we are going to afford to pay our rent that's due next week, or the concern about not finishing a project at work on time, or the nervousness about if we will get selected for our sporting club this weekend, or perhaps we are fearful of catching COVID-19? We forward think, and we focus our attention on everything that we don't want to occur. It's great to forward think, because we want to visualize success for ourselves in the future, and we want that clear picture in our mind of what that success looks like. Visualization is an important part of the journey towards our goals and success, as we want to manifest that vision into reality. We want to keep that vision clear in our minds, allowing it to continually drive us, and help reassure us that we can achieve our goal, whilst reaffirming the belief we should have in ourselves. The problem is, too many of us don't think that way. We allow our mindset to continually focus on all that can go wrong, and only two outcomes result here, being that what we believed would go wrong, does indeed go wrong, or we simply don't even attempt to pursue what we desire at all, because we are overwhelmed with fear.

What does fear, worry, concern, stress, anxiety, and depression, do to our mindset? They all generate negativity. As each of these emotions continually build up, they easily transform into anger and frustration. It's a constant pressure build up, and it ultimately reaches a point where we have to release it, and it's unfortunate that other people are the ones who unfairly cop the brunt of it, including our friends and loved ones. Even in the situation where our life is travelling okay, and we are free of negative circumstances and adversity, we are shockers for believing that something bad is likely to happen soon. It's like we sit around in anticipation for this negative experience to happen. Why do we allow our minds to continually focus on the things we don't want, the things that will hold us back, and everything that is causing us concern? What if we changed our habit, and changed our mindset? What if we started to instead focus on all that we do want, all the things that are progressing us towards success, and just concentrated on being happy? What if we placed all those concerns and worries at the back of our mind, and focused on what we can control right now, and what success we can achieve for ourselves? Why can't we just focus on this very moment, and what action we can do that will take us another step forward towards success? You might think that sounds easy in theory, and you'd be right. Of course it's easy to say or write things, we need to take action, we need to take responsibility for our mindset. We need to take ownership in working on our mindset, we need to strengthen it, and we do that by continually engaging in motivational content, mindset training, and actually through identifying the situations in which we do think negatively, so we can then overcome it. It needs to become habit! Like anything, when you keep working on it, you slowly become better at it!

Take a moment to bring those concerns and worries forward to your thoughts. Now think to yourself, are they really that bad? Are they really life threatening, or are you just perceiving them to be? Are you creating the outcome in your head of something bad that will definitely happen, or only something that may happen? Are you stressing over something you can or can't control? Even when situations and circumstances may inconvenience us, frustrate us, and not pan out the way in which we like, it doesn't mean it's the end of the world. Much of the time, these such instances are wonderful opportunities to learn and grow ourselves. Any situations and circumstances you cannot control, don't waste energy on them. Take action and make changes where necessary, to situations and circumstances you can control though, because at the end of the day, you are in control. You are also in complete control over your thoughts, your feelings, and your actions. If we want positivity, success, and happiness, in our life, then change your perception. Start focusing on what you do want to occur and achieve in life, not what you don't want to occur or eventuate. To finish today's blog entry, in the words of Rob Dial "If you change your perception of the way that everything happens to you, then you realize there are no step backs".

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