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8 Principles of Stoicism That Can Improve Your Life

The most timeless philosophical guidance.

By Leon MacfaydenPublished 3 years ago 10 min read
Photo by Jan Demiralp on Unsplash

Stoicism is an ancient philosophy that began thousands of years ago and has remained popular today because it offers practical guidance for people who live in the real world. It is designed to make us stronger, healthier, and happier and has stood the test of time.

The three most famous Stoics are Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and Epictetus. I will combine the best philosophy from all three to provide you with a practical guide to improve your life.

Can you imagine a future where you have the strength to do the right thing even when it is difficult or painful? How about being admired as a leader instead of a follower? These things are possible provided you work on yourself.

Stoicism has changed my outlook on life, and I hope it helps you too.

1. Focus on What You Can Control.

“You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”

-Marcus Aurelius.

Like much from Stoicism, this principle aligns with teachings from Buddhism. There is nothing to be gained from worrying about events over which you have no control. And as the only thing you can control is yourself, you will be letting a lot of worries go.

If you are scared of Covid, you can get vaccinated and take sensible precautions. But after that, you cannot do anything else. So let it go.

If you are scared of Russia invading Ukraine, there is nothing you can do about it if you are the average person. So let it go.

If you are scared of a stock market crash, you can’t prevent it, and if you withdraw your money, it will be eaten by inflation anyway. So let it go.

The other day, my wife had to fly back from a holiday during the worst storm here in 30 years. Naturally, I worried, but could I do anything about it? Nothing. So in an ideal world, I would let it go.

Notice how I said, “in an ideal world.” No one is a master at this stuff. It is eternally practiced, where you will fail many times. The journey provides the rewards.

A by-product of focusing only on what you can control is stopping criticizing others. You can have a conversation where you disagree, but they will make their minds up.

So let it go.

2. Take Action.

“To stop talking about what the good man is like, and just be one.”

-Marcus Aurelius.

Be proactive in your life. Make a plan and stick to it, but don’t take too long. Far too many people use plans, dreams, and goals as a way to procrastinate. They are always waiting until the time is right or when the feeling of inspiration hits.

Let me tell you a secret — the best time to start is almost always NOW. Once you have a basic plan and some goals, start. Learn in the arena. Get beaten down but get back up. It is the only way to succeed.

Never give up on what is important to you. Make short, medium, and long-term goals and use those to guide you.

Currently, my short-term goal is to continue building a writing portfolio. I write at least five days per week, which is my bare minimum. At the same time, I regularly take courses and read books to expand my knowledge, so I have more ideas about which to write.

My medium-term goal is to make enough money from writing to top up my investments in the Stock Market regularly. I invest every spare penny and have a six-figure sum in Stocks and Bonds. People fear a Stock Market Crash, but most people are always fearful. Their fear has no place in my goal.

My long-term goal is to become a millionaire by 65. I am currently on target.

Crucially, I am already taking action. I am not waiting until I finish my writing courses, and I am not waiting until I complete every possible book on a subject before I contribute. I am not waiting for perfect stock market conditions or for when I get a good feeling.

Some of my writing sucks. Some of my investments have not paid off. I learned lessons from these failures that I would never have learned any other way. I am truly grateful.

3. Be Virtuous.

“No man is good by chance. Virtue is something which must be learned.”

-Seneca.

The four virtues of Stoicism are Courage, Temperance, Justice, and Wisdom. They are all entwined.

Courage means facing difficult and painful things, leading to Justice, where you dare to do what is right regardless of the difficulty. You gain the strength necessary for courage through Temperance, which is the self-imposed moderation of luxury. Finally, Wisdom is gained from the truth and understanding derived from continual learning.

For me, my life has been all about courage — or rather the lack of it. I was bullied through my school years, but I had found courage through Martial Arts by the time I reached adulthood. However, I was still not confident enough, so I joined the Police to test myself and find out what I was made of.

My career in the Police taught me many bad things about people and eventually led to me suffering PTSD. But it was not all bad.

I did gain courage from tackling hardened criminals, sometimes alone. I developed Temperance through the harsh lifestyle. I was constantly changing shift patterns, working through the night, standing for 13 hours alone at a sickening crime scene, and never knowing what horrors were awaiting me every day.

I developed a sense of justice from constantly helping and saving people even though the odds were often against me, and all I wanted to do was run in the other direction.

Overall, the Police taught me what I could do in times of terror and brought out the courage to put my life on the line for strangers. I am grateful for these lessons.

4. Lead by Example.

“Don’t explain your philosophy. Embody it.”

-Epictetus.

Every Stoic needs to show others how to be better. Not through talking but through actions. Don’t tell others about your virtue. Let them recognize it. Speak softly but carry a big stick and let your actions do the talking.

I am forced to use words to describe my achievements when communicating with you, but I only do so to inspire others. The fact is I suffered Depression for ten years, where even getting out of bed was a Herculean feat of willpower. I gained weight, stopped caring about my appearance, and gave up on life.

I am proud to say I have escaped this lifestyle. I have been Depression free for years now, and I live productively. Every day I write, study, read and enjoy myself. When I was depressed, people thought I was ill for life. They thought I would never achieve anything again. Yet here I am in my own house with a beautiful wife, money in the bank, and the freedom to do what I love.

You need to know it is possible and as things stand, I can only show you through my words.

5. Diminish Your Ego.

“If what you have seems insufficient to you, then though you possess the world, you will yet be miserable.”

-Seneca.

The Ego is the cause of so many problems. It gives us an unhealthy belief in our importance, thereby judging and putting others down.

It gives us a distorted view of our abilities. The Ego makes a beginner think they are the best in the world. Hard work and mistakes don’t apply to them because they are the next big thing. When such a person fails, they give up. They don’t blame themselves. They blame the project, the website, other people, their parents — any scapegoat will do.

These are the people that hang around beginner groups online. If you want proof, look at writing groups. Many are filled with toxic people ready to tell an excited newbie to give up because the websites suck and no one can make money anymore. They will tell you you are too old, too stupid, or late to the party. The sad truth is, these naysayers make up most people in life — people who bounce from one failure to another, always giving up at the first sign of trouble. The Ego is making these people’s lives a misery, and they, in turn, will project it onto you.

One way to silence the Ego is called the “Opposite Principle.” If you are bored, work. If you are tired, exercise. Whatever commands your ego is issuing, override them. Keep doing this until the Ego learns who is boss and its power diminishes. You won’t have time to worry about what the failing majority are doing because you will be too busy focusing on yourself.

Eventually, you will learn that the most intelligent people realize how little they know, while the fool believes he has it all figured out.

6. Develop Resilience.

“Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.”

-Seneca.

Our difficulties are a chance to grow stronger. We can improve our levels of resilience by practicing “Non-Complaining.” Start by noticing how much of your daily conversation is spent moaning about something- the weather, the economy, corruption, elitism, left-wingers, right-wingers… just an endless tirade with no end or solution.

Just stop it.

There is a lot of truth in the phrase “if you don’t have anything good to say, then say nothing.” See if you can do it for a week and check how you feel.

Again I should stress you will never perfect all these techniques and concepts. There will always be times when your new resolve waivers. In those cases, notice and return to your new steady-state as soon as possible.

My route to Resilience came through Martial Arts. Twice a week, I would attend a Karate Club and twice a week, I would go to a Boxing Club. Each club was tough with other men in peak condition. The training was hard and grueling, but no matter what happened, I didn’t quit. I learned how it felt to be knocked out on your feet but keep going. I took these lessons from the Dojo into my everyday life. Most daily situations were a breeze compared to my training, and I am proud of my resilience to this day.

Be the kind of person who gets knocked down nine times but gets up 10.

7. Choose Your Response.

“It does not matter what you bear, but how you bear it.”

-Seneca.

There is a difference between responding and reacting. If you react, you do so emotionally. You are at the mercy of external forces and allow your emotions to bounce around depending on events that happen TO you. If you respond, it means you have taken a step back and assessed the situation. From there, you have calmly selected the best action to take. By responding, you determine your fate. You get to decide how you feel regardless of what is happening in the outside world.

How you respond is a focal point for the ever-popular Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. This kind of counseling teaches that your interpretation lies between an Event and an Emotion. Therefore it is not the event making you angry or sad, but how you process the event.

I have learned to take a walk after an event leaves me feeling angry. A 20-minute walk is good for my health, and it clears my mind and gives me a chance to calm down. I can then return to the situation with a fresh perspective and a level head.

8. Be Grateful.

When you arise in the morning think of what a privilege it is to be alive, to think, to enjoy, to love.

- Marcus Aurelius

Many people have a lot to be grateful for — so much that you need to keep a Gratitude Journal to remind yourself of it all. Start small and built up. I bet you can find hundreds of reasons for gratitude. Incidentally, and I cannot pretend to know why, the more you focus on gratitude, the more good things happen. The abundance mindset creates abundance.

Practice misfortune. Experiencing deprivation, even self-imposed makes you tougher, stops you from taking everyday comfort for granted, and cultivates empathy. If you don’t want to push yourself this far, then at least imagine how bad your life could be in as much detail as possible.

My Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder forces me to imagine all kinds of horrific scenarios. I think about how bad my life could be all the time. Over time, I have learned to be grateful as these visions of doom remind me how lucky I am.

I could have ended up down the lonely road of many mentally ill people — loveless, friendless, penniless, and purposeless. Through a combination of grit and fortune, I didn’t. And I sure am grateful for that.

Conclusion

Sticking to these eight principles can change your life. They are hard — so hard that you won’t master them — but life is not meant to be easy, and the joy comes from the journey. Making mistakes is how we learn. When we pay attention to ourselves, we will know when we have gotten off track and gently guide ourselves back to these concepts.

If something has worked for thousands of years, it is a good sign of its usefulness. This article may be just the beginning for you and your exploration of the world of Stoicism.

Click here to grab my FREE Masculinity Checklist. Actionable steps to become a better man. Live life on your terms.

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About the Creator

Leon Macfayden

From a police officer to a psychiatric ward and recovery.

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