10 Subtle Signs You Are Struggling with Low Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is a delicate balance. While you might think you're brimming with confidence, your actions might be telling a different story. Certain behaviors, often unnoticed, can reveal underlying self-doubt. Building self-esteem may not be a day’s job but with constant practice and recognizing your self-worth, you can master the art of recognizing your strength and weaknesses and then work on your inner self to regain respect from the people who belittle you in some ways. Recognizing these signs is the first step to reclaiming your confidence and living authentically.

Here are 10 things you might not realize you're doing that indicate low self-esteem, and you must deal with them now!

1. Over-Apologizing

Do you frequently apologize, even when there’s no need? This habit often stems from a fear of conflict or rejection, leaving you feeling as though you’re always at fault.

Tip: Not everything requires an apology. Practice pausing before you say “sorry” to evaluate if it’s truly warranted. Avoiding eye contact especially when having a conversation with someone is one sure way to tell them how insecure you are. You don’t have to keep an intense gaze, but make sure you look at people in the eyes for almost a minute before breaking the gaze.

2. Constant Self-Deprecation

Do you deflect compliments with self-deprecating jokes? Phrases like, “Oh, it’s nothing,” or “I just got lucky,” might seem harmless but can reflect discomfort with praise.

Tip: Accept compliments graciously. They’re not about arrogance, they’re about recognizing your worth. Trying to please people by stooping too low, is not humility, it is a sign of low self-esteem, and hence you must desist from it.

3. Avoiding Eye Contact

Eye contact conveys confidence and respect. However, if you often avoid it, it could stem from a fear of judgment or rejection.

Tip: Start small, practice maintaining eye contact in brief conversations to build confidence over time.

4. Negative Self-Talk

Your inner voice can shape your self-perception. If it’s filled with criticism and doubt, it’s time for a change.

Tip: Challenge negative thoughts. Speak to yourself with the same kindness you’d offer a friend.

5. Seeking External Validation

Do others’ opinions define your self-worth? Constantly looking for approval might suggest you doubt your own value.

Tip: Trust your instincts and decisions. While others’ input can be valuable, your self-worth shouldn’t depend on it.

6. Struggling to Accept Love and Kindness

Feeling unworthy of affection can lead you to push away the very people who care about you.

Tip: Remind yourself that love and kindness are not earned; they are given freely. Accept them with an open heart.

7. Hiding Your True Self

Do you adjust your personality to fit in? Masking your true self can leave you feeling disconnected and exhausted.

Tip: Embrace your authentic self. Your unique qualities make you who you are—let them shine.

8. Overachieving

Pushing yourself to meet impossibly high standards might mask feelings of inadequacy.

Tip: Strive for progress, not perfection. Remember, your value isn’t tied to your achievements.

9. Avoiding Risks

Fear of failure might keep you from stepping outside your comfort zone.

Tip: Take small steps toward trying new things. Failure isn’t the end, it’s a stepping stone to growth.

10. Neglecting Self-Care

Putting others’ needs above your own can lead to burnout and low self-esteem.

Tip: Prioritize self-care. Eat well, rest, and do activities that bring you joy. Taking care of yourself is not selfish, it’s necessary.

Recognizing these behaviors is the first step toward change. By addressing these patterns, you can begin to rebuild your self-esteem and live a life filled with confidence and authenticity. You deserve it.