Willowmeana's Guide To Making Recovery from Surgery Suck Less

Last week I had surgery. And I've decided it sucks.

I mean, I decided that last time, too. I've had 4 surgeries now, ranging from cutting out a huge portion of my intestines, a gallbladder removal, and two exploratory surgeries. And EVERY time, I've come to the same conclusion: It. Freaking. SUCKS.

However, surgery isn't something that's handed out like candy, and even minor surgeries are taken seriously. Oftentimes, surgery is necessary rather than optional.

So I've made a guide to make surgery suck less for those who have time to prepare for it.

Healing from surgery isn't all bad because of pain. Don't get me wrong - surgery hurts. But the pain isn't the only obstacle. There are also nasty side effects from medication, swelling, and for some, surgery isn't the only solution to solving their issue.

Most people also aren't permitted enough time off from work to recover from surgery, resulting in delayed healing and permanent damage, and while I can't solve that issue, I can advise you to get a job with employers who treat you like a human. Jobs are replaceable - you are not.

So, if you are getting ready to be sliced and diced - for whatever reason - here are some tips to help you prepare for and recover from your surgery.

1. Hydrate like you've never hydrated in your life for 48 hours before your surgery. If you drink a lot of carbonation or caffeine, you're going to need to make healthier choices before surgery. Stick to water, electrolytes, and teas right before surgery. The more hydrated you are, the easier it is to get that IV into your veins and thread it. Also, being hydrated helps your blood flow and reduces swelling, and lowers the risk of blood clots. Also, you can't leave the hospital after some surgeries until you urinate on your own. Being hydrated will get you discharged faster.

2. If you are having surgery in your abdominal or gastric area, it helps your doctors if you shrink your liver before surgery. When I had a large portion of my stomach removed, the doctor requested that I go on a clear liquid diet for 5 days before my surgery so I could shrink my liver. The more you consume, the more your liver is processing, and the bigger it is, which can be a problem for laparoscopic surgeries. From what I understand, it doesn't have to be strictly a liquid diet, as long as it avoids fats, carbohydrates, and sugars. It focuses on consuming lean proteins, starch-free veggies, and many fluids. Please, for my sake, ask your doctor if you NEED to resort to such measures before your surgery, before taking this advice, and make sure they educate you properly. Malnutrition is dangerous.

3. If you are like me - an angsty little ball of stress, anxiety, and trauma - please consult your doctors about getting an anti-anxiety medicine before your surgery. Most surgical nurses who accompany and prepare you for surgery are amazing and have the bedside manner of angels. But some don't. I have a traumatic past involving sedatives. I'm not usually worried about the surgery itself, for me it's the torture of being unconscious, nearly dead, cut open, my guts hanging out, and at the mercy of other human beings. I know, dramatic, right? By the time the Night Night Juice gets pushed, I'm hyperventilating, sobbing, and clinging to the most motherly or sweetest nurse I can grab. And I can confirm that if I'm sedated while having a panic attack, I wake up having one too. There is no shame in the chill-out med game, friends. Surgery is stressful.

4. Take a laxative the morning of your surgery or RIGHT after your surgery. Your nurses will suggest it, and say you 'might' get constipated. Understand there is no "might" about it. TAKE THE LAXATIVE FRIEND. I'm telling you that as someone who does not have poop problems. Actually, yes, I do. I poop too much, too easily. I am NEVER constipated because... this body doesn't know what "SOLID" is anymore after all of my health issues. I know it's TMI - but I need you to understand the emphasis of: take...the... laxative.

5. Movement is healing. Rest is imperative for healing. However, so are small movements. You are going to have a lot of gas after surgery, and it may even build up in your shoulder as a sharp pain. Gentle stretches that do not hurt you, and walking around, will help you get out all of the gas inside you. Make sure you follow your doctor's instructions on your physical restrictions.

6. Clean your house before your surgery. Do the dishes. Wash, fold, put away laundry. Vacuum, sweep, mop, declutter. Having a clean house before your surgery will help keep you stress-free and prevent you from giving in to the impulse to clean when you shouldn't be making sweeping motions or bending over. I have kids, so it's hard to really say that I follow my own advice here. But, thankfully, I have a good support network, which takes us to number 7.

7. Call on your support network. Before your surgery, you're going to need a network of people who can support you through the procedure and the healing process. Especially if you have kids, or if you're the heart of your household. If there is at least one person you can trust to help you, it makes things much easier. I have a whole family, and even my 7-year-old makes an extra effort to do good in school and her chores when I am down. Just a gentle reminder to those who don't ask for help because they are strong, independent, stubborn heads that everyone needs help sometimes, and it doesn't mean you're weak or lesser for it. Surgery time is one of those times.

8. Last but not least - follow your doctor's instructions, and if you have any uncertainties - ask your doctor as many questions as you need.

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