Small Business Dream or Start Up Cost Nightmare?

When you were a kid, what did you want to do for a living when you grew up? Were you one of those boys who wanted to be a fireman or a doctor so you could save lives in a heroic effort? Were you one of those girls who wanted to be a supermodel or actress so that everybody would love you? Or were you just dreading the whole growing up thing because you knew that you weren't a hero or a supermodel? Yeah, I know, me too.

I didn't have a choice really. I grew up regardless of my procrastination about it. After realizing that my minimum wage life was never going to afford a new car or a new house, I decided to try my luck on college. Sadly, that didn't pan out either. Instead of a new car or a new house, I just got a 50k debt added to my credit score for a piece of paper. I figured the only people who actually could afford new cars or new houses (besides doctors, accountants, lawyers, athletes, and supermodels) had to be successful Entrepreneurs. People like Bill Gates or Donald Trump or Elon Musk. They weren't athletes or supermodels and they made their fortunes somehow. There had to be a way, even if college wasn't going to bring me to my pot of gold.

From 2014 to 2016, I started and co-owned a small business called "Lawns by Norman, LLC" which was a mom and pop landscaping business. We literally started with nothing except hope, will, a computer, and a loan. I had done some research on small business start-up costs and landscaping business constantly came up on the top 10 list of best investments. The reason is because the start up costs are reasonably low compared to others and the manpower needed is also less compared to other endeavors. My husband had been in landscaping service most of his career life so I trusted his know-how. I had enough experience in accounting, marketing, and customer service to run the office end of it. We had zero customers to begin with, but in just six months time we were up to about 20-25. By the middle of 2015 we were up to almost 50 monthly clients. We did not have a crew though we hired temporary people sometimes when the work load was too much for one person to do. It seems unlikely doesn't it? How was that possible? How could one man handle 50 different properties in a month's time? Careful planning, scheduling, and quoting, that's how. How could one woman handle all the accounts payables and recievables and still find time to update the website and gain organic google search results? Careful, learned and diligent work and ambitious time management, that's how. Did I consider our business a success? Yes and No.

Our successes included obtaining a client list of 60 subscribers to our services. We were registered and insured. We had working and useful equipment. We had a strong reputation with our customers who knew us as reliable and trustworthy. And we were bringing in enough money to pay our bills and debts. Did we get a new car or a new house out of it? No. Did we go on a splendid 2-week vacation to Disney World Resort because we were business owners? Not exactly.

We had to sell the business after two years of building it. We were at a block in the road, a sort of hump that we could not get past. In order for us to increase our client list and profits, we would need to hire employees for a permanent crew. Yet we could not afford to pay them, especially not at the minimum wage. Even just hiring them for a day as a temporary was very expensive to our budget. Knowing this we considered other problems that could occur. What if our one man (my husband and co-owner) got sick or needed some time off? Who would know the route and the routine and could be trusted to uphold our reputation and protect our equipment and assets? One trip to the hospital, and our company could be destroyed. We knew we had been lucky for 2 years, but we also knew that luck doesn't last forever. We had to make a decision. Keep going until we get buried, or sell and cut our losses. We chose to sell.

The reason I say we were both successful and not successful is because the start-up, the profit, and the end sale were all successful. However, at the point of sale, we were not successful at paying back the initial loan of 20k that had afforded us the equipment that we used for our services. I think we only paid about half of the loan. So in that aspect, I can't say we were successful. Were we honorable, hard working, and trustworthy? I believe so. Did that get us into a new car or a new house? No.

When my husband and I were separated directly after the sale of our business, I was on my own to find my own way for three years. I was clueless and felt scared and desperate. For a long time I thought maybe I'd make a living somehow as an Avon sales rep. Very low start up costs, and I loved their products. That was not the way though as the internet sells the products better. Then I thought about opening my own art gallery. I'm still working on this idea and have been trying to figure it out for the past three years as I've lived under the roof of my (now) ex-husband. He's fine. He went back to work in landscaping for a big successful company that can afford a crew. I'm just the housekeeper now. But I still can't afford my own house or a new car.

Yes, I'm a writer. Yes, I'm a college grad. Yes, I'm a former teacher and a former business owner. Yes, I am in debt for student loans and other loans to the sum of about 75k. Is my net worth really in the negative after all of the hard work, study, and honorable intentions I've had for 53 years? Is it stupid to be a good person? Do good people only get to live in ghetto apartments and drive used crappy cars? Is that the truth that I've been too stupid to comprehend?

Maybe I'm being overdramatic or playing an unnecessary violin pity party song. Let me continue with my points about entrepreneurs and start up costs.

As I've been researching options for my small business (Jane's Gifts) for the past three years, my research has been frought with very negative information. Want to lease a retail space? The cost is anywhere from $700 to $5000 per month. Yeah, sure, right. As if. Want to start at the flea market? A 10x10 space at the flea market is going to cost about $600 to move into. Want to store products at a storage closet facility? A 10x10 space is going to cost you about $200 to $300 per month. Want to start your art gallery at Shopify? That's going to cost about $100 to $200 per month. Where are you going to find the money for these start-up costs, when it's just you, all alone, and you have a rotten credit score from going to college and supporting your ex-husband's dream? Hmmmmmm? I have no idea.