Doña Juanita Speaks #2 — The Fool’s Guide to Immortality”
by book "Useless Immortality".
Wagwaan, Earthlings.
Donya Juanita reporting live from the quantum jungle — the place where neurons, hyper-pop, and old gods share the same coffee machine.
Last time we spoke, immortality was... useless? Spoiler:
Daytime Human.
That’s your standard unit: you, me, your grandma, your cousin Marge, or that BDSM actor from the East Coast. We all got our daytime grind while the sun's out — running around trying to get stuff done before it takes a nosedive behind the skyline.
You desperately need that discounted kettle, you're asking for a raise, you fall off a bike trying to show off, or your kid's howling because the toy they wanted doesn’t exist in this time-space continuum.
Even if none of that hits exactly right, I bet I’ll still nail something: maybe you go to work, maybe you’re unemployed. Maybe you have kids, maybe you don’t. Maybe you’re a party animal or a lone- wolf hermit. Sooner or later, one of these sticks.
Anyway, most of us interact with the outside world during daylight hours (unless you’re a night owl). Even they eventually hit the sheets — even if it’s at 7am after a bender.
But the result is always the same.
We dive into bed, maybe put on pajamas (or not), throw a blanket over ourselves, turn off the light. And then it happens — the part where we’re left alone with the unfiltered version of ourselves. The daily noise fades out, and the inner monologue sneaks in like a pissed-off cat that didn’t get its tuna snack.
What kind of thoughts are these? Well, that’s where this guy comes in.
Nighttime Human.
“So I’m what — 25 years? 40? 60? Whatever. How much longer will I be able to stay active, physically strong? When exactly does the rotting begin — inside and out? And when do I turn into… wait, no, can’t say that, that’s ageist!
Like, take my neighbor Tony. He’s an elderly guy, sure, but he’s out there living his best life — always out with friends, drinking beer, playing cards. Full-on silver fox energy.
But what if I don’t turn out like that? What if I end up with some degenerative disease, Alzheimer’s or whatever, and I slowly turn into… nope, can’t say that either, still ageist!
The truth is, I’m terrified I won’t recognize myself one day. That my body — my face — won’t feel like mine anymore. Not scary, not ugly, just… unfamiliar.
I wonder if Tony even looks in the mirror… what does he see there? Probably someone happy. Someone whole. If I were in his shoes, I think I’d just smash every mirror in the house. My reflection?
Honestly, it belongs in a horror movie, not real life. Harsh, I know… apologies to the woke part of my brain.
And what if I become so helpless they stick me in a nursing home? Sometimes nursing homes feel less like care facilities and more like warehouses for the inconvenient.
Shit. I don’t wanna end up in a place like that!
And the spiral keeps spinning, tighter and tighter, dragging you down into some mental abyss. Only sleep — sweet, merciful sleep — might save you. But not before it throws you around a bit:
I’m gonna die. Like, I’m actually gonna die. And it will happen. Even though I belong to this-or-that religion and technically believe in some afterlife paradise, there’s still this awful moment where I think… what if it’s not real?
What if I don’t get to sip cocktails and grill burgers with my favorite people in the great beyond? Because — they’re gonna die too.
Mommy, help.
What if the atheists are right, and we just vanish — like actual vanish — dissolve into some poetic nothingness? Some Absolute Infinity or whatever.
Or more bluntly: what if we just die and that’s it?
I mean, I’ve eaten, drunk, worked, fought, made up, laughed, cried — lived. And all of it, every little bit, could just evaporate. Along with me. The me that felt it all. Can that really be? And what if it is?!
And before all that, I’ll probably have to bury my grandparents. Then my parents. Will I even be able to stand there, over my dad’s casket, and look into that face that used to be so alive?
Nope. I’ll lose it. I swear. I don’t want that. Why is life so cruel?!”
This final question always seems to wrap up such spirals perfectly. Life is cruel. It kills everyone eventually, then dumps you at a bus stop called “Death.” And for some reason, people just… accept that. Nobody calls the cops. No one files a complaint against the system.
This kind of personal violation goes unpunished. Because see, when your oppressor is flesh and blood, you can fight back. Humanity invented all kinds of ways to deal with human monsters.
But what do you do with something as Real and as Metaphysical as Death?
You can’t put her on trial. She doesn’t care about your little gavel, your trembling fist. She does whatever the hell she wants — and nobody can stop her.
So what do you do?
At the very least, breathe. Inhale. Exhale. Count to ten (it doesn’t help me, but maybe it’ll help you). Take a big sip from your favorite mug — you know, the one that says “I love myself.”
Then keep reading this weird little guide.
And at most? Start asking yourself some big, uncomfortable questions. This is not advice. It’s just what I did.
By author: If this transmission resonated with your bio-circuitry, stay tuned, comrades.
The next chapter will be even more transhumanistic and cyberpunk-flavored — like if Philip K. Dick got reincarnated as an you:)
#transhumanism
#cyberpunk
#techno shamanism
#digital consciousness
#artificial intelligence
About the Creator
C.J.Night
Just wierd writer. Not Gigi Hadid, but GG Allin. A visionary, a dawg from da hood, a person who believes Cats are immortal. Author of Useless Immortality, Babylon Is Us, Holy Wood and a lot of other crap (available on Amazon, Lulu, etc).
Day 4 of Quitting
If this is how sobriety feels, maybe it’s better to go through life a little buzzed… this, along with other hits like, I want to kill myself, I wish I was dead, and I’m going to throw myself off a bridge have been the only thoughts on rotation these past few days. I promise myself that if, in a month, I still feel like this (‘this’ meaning despondent, full of rage, and simultaneously numb) I can go back to smoking. Until mid-February though? Nicotine is off the table.
By sleepy drafts5 days ago in Longevity
Stricter blood pressure guidelines are fueling growing unease among cardiologists, raising concerns about overdiagnosis and treatment
Recent changes in blood pressure guidelines have sparked a quiet but growing unease among cardiologists and healthcare professionals worldwide. As medical authorities lower the threshold for what is considered “high blood pressure,” millions of people may suddenly find themselves classified as hypertensive, prompting new questions about overdiagnosis, overtreatment, and the balance between preventive care and unnecessary medical intervention. The Shift in Blood Pressure Standards For decades, blood pressure readings below 140/90 mmHg were generally considered normal for most adults. However, in recent years, both the American Heart Association (AHA) and other international health bodies have revised their guidelines, lowering the threshold for hypertension to 130/80 mmHg. This change was driven by mounting evidence linking even moderately elevated blood pressure to cardiovascular events such as heart attacks, strokes, and kidney disease. While the intent behind stricter guidelines is clear—catching potential risks earlier to prevent serious health issues—the practical implications are complex. Suddenly, a large portion of the adult population falls into the “high blood pressure” category. In the United States alone, experts estimate that nearly half of all adults would now be labeled hypertensive under the new standards. Cardiologists Sound the Alarm For many cardiologists, the shift raises concerns about overdiagnosis. Dr. Elena Martinez, a practicing cardiologist in New York, says, “We are medicalizing a huge swath of the population who may not have needed treatment before. While preventive care is vital, there’s a real risk of unnecessary medication, side effects, and patient anxiety.” These concerns are not purely theoretical. Blood pressure medications, while life-saving for those with severe hypertension, can cause side effects ranging from dizziness and fatigue to kidney complications. Prescribing them to patients with mild elevations might not always result in a net benefit, particularly if lifestyle interventions could have been sufficient. The Role of Lifestyle Interventions Many experts emphasize that lifestyle modifications—such as regular exercise, reduced sodium intake, weight management, and stress reduction—remain the first line of defense against high blood pressure. The stricter guidelines may push physicians to prioritize early lifestyle counseling, but in practice, patients often expect a prescription as a tangible solution. Dr. Ahmed Khan, a public health specialist, notes, “The risk is that the pendulum swings too far toward pharmacological solutions when, for many, diet and exercise could prevent progression without the risks of medication. It’s a delicate balance that requires careful patient education.” Public Perception and Anxiety Beyond the clinical implications, stricter guidelines can affect public perception of health. Patients newly labeled as hypertensive may experience anxiety, feel stigmatized, or overestimate their immediate risk of serious illness. Mental health impacts are rarely discussed but are an important aspect of overall cardiovascular wellness. Media coverage and public awareness campaigns have also contributed to heightened sensitivity. Headlines emphasizing the dangers of “high blood pressure” may inadvertently increase stress among readers, ironically exacerbating the problem they aim to address. Economic and Healthcare System Pressures The broader healthcare system also feels the strain. More diagnoses mean more doctor visits, lab tests, and medications. Health insurance systems face increased costs, while physicians must spend more time managing cases that may not require intensive intervention. Some healthcare analysts argue that the stricter guidelines, while scientifically justified, could inadvertently prioritize pharmaceutical intervention over holistic preventive care. The challenge lies in implementing guidelines in a way that maximizes patient benefit while minimizing unnecessary medicalization. Finding the Balance So, how can the medical community reconcile stricter guidelines with patient-centered care? Many experts advocate for a nuanced approach: Risk Stratification: Evaluate patients based on overall cardiovascular risk rather than just blood pressure numbers. Factors like age, family history, cholesterol, and lifestyle are critical in deciding whether medication is necessary. Emphasis on Lifestyle: Encourage sustained behavioral changes, with medications as a last resort for mild cases. Patient Education: Ensure individuals understand what their blood pressure numbers mean, the relative risks involved, and the options for non-pharmacological management. Regular Monitoring: Use home monitoring devices and ambulatory blood pressure measurement to reduce unnecessary clinic visits and detect true hypertensive trends. Conclusion The new blood pressure guidelines reflect an earnest effort to prevent cardiovascular disease before it starts. Yet, they also highlight the delicate balance between preventive medicine and overdiagnosis. For cardiologists, policymakers, and patients alike, the challenge is clear: avoid the pitfalls of medicalizing normal variations while ensuring those truly at risk receive timely and effective care. As the debate continues, the hope is that a thoughtful, individualized approach—combining lifestyle interventions, patient education, and careful use of medication—will maximize benefits while minimizing harm. The evolving standards are a reminder that medicine is as much an art as it is a science, requiring judgment, empathy, and adaptability in the face of shifting evidence.
By Fiazahmedbrohi 6 days ago in Longevity
Comments
There are no comments for this story
Be the first to respond and start the conversation.