“Soft Life, Engineering Regrets & Midnight Delusions”

“I do not struggle so much with mathematics. I bet I would excel in engineering.”

If only she knew her life was about to get far less soft — because in her world, softness was the only true way to live.

She proceeds to pick one of the most challenging engineering courses.

In her words: “I love challenging myself.”

Ladies and gentlemen, let’s all have a good laugh at this sweet, naive little child.

Well, here she is.

Not so little anymore — she’s on her student-sized bed, in a school hostel that treats her like she owes it money.

Every morning, she grumbles while queuing for water:

“If only I could afford a more conducive environment, maybe life would be a little smoother.”

She’s decided to start documenting her life struggles — not because she’s great at journaling (she isn’t), but because she’s good at staring at a glowing screen at 1:33AM wondering why everything is so hard.

So here she is.

Writing something that feels like journaling... but isn’t.

(Disclaimer: It totally is. She just doesn’t want to admit it.)

Also — she got bored halfway through a Python tutorial on YouTube and needed a distraction that didn’t involve chugging chocolate-vanilla biscuits and a whole lot of candy she definitely didn’t need. So here we are.

She didn’t want to give herself a name — anonymity is part of the charm — but let’s call her Audrey.

Because if her parents were Americans, she swears that’s what they would have named her.

Feel free to call her something else. She’s already handed you her soul in this makeshift journal — might as well go all in.

She just remembered she has a 9AM class in a few hours.

She needs her beauty sleep.

Because softness — say it with her now — is the only true way to live.

See you soon.

Your favorite not-so-soft babe.

XOXO

SIKEEEEEEEEEEEE!

She proceeds to doom-scroll on TikTok with the intent to fry her brains with the not-so-helpful influencers that live the soft life she dreams of.

Just a few weeks ago, her For You Page was invaded by successful engineering creators, and she only felt motivated if the creator was a female engineer living the "influencer" life she obsesses over.

While rotting her brain, she gets spicy flashbacks from the sleepover at her boyfriend's place.

A boyfriend she doesn’t even consider a boyfriend, because he didn’t ask her out like her dreams had envisioned.

What was the vision?

A cake with a funny girlfriend meme on it.

A jewelry box as a gift for saying yes.

A handwritten card promising to be intentional and loving all the days of his life.

All of this happening by the beach, while she’s in a sexy-but-classy beach outfit, drenched in gold jewelry — because if she were "that girl", jewelry would be her identity.

Her delusional self believes he’ll do better once he gets out of whatever situation he’s in.

He better do better — because Soft Audrey will drop him off at the nearest bus stop if he doesn’t attempt to impress her.

“Oh my God! I'm hungry,” she mumbles, as her stomach rumbles more than Arsenal fans when their match doesn’t go as expected.

Don’t think she actually got down from her bunk to fix something to eat — she’d rather starve than fight the midnight laziness that comes while doom-scrolling.

You really shouldn’t expect too much from someone who wants a girlfriend proposal by the beach.

The state she (and her “boyfriend”) lives in doesn’t even have a beach.

Go ahead and laugh again at Audrey — or whatever you decided to call Her.

She was ready to say goodnight at 2:30AM.

Guess who was still staring at her screen by 3:46AM?

She finally decided to sleep.

Nobody forced her to pick a career this challenging — she wanted a challenge, and she has definitely found it now.

She made her bed, placed her favorite doll close by, and laid on it.

You’d think the doll is for comfort.

Nope. She will roll over and suffocate the poor doll in her sleep.

That is not so soft of you, Audrey.

Just a soft babe trying to survive engineering and emotional instability.

Posts when sleep isn’t working.