Diary of Anony Elle

If you read the last post, forgive me… I was rambling.

See, I have a plan!

I have learned that perfection is not needed to start that plan. So, I just started it. I am committed and I will not allow my circumstances to deter me like I have many times before. Not this time. This time I am focused, dedicated, and willing to do everything that I need to do to achieve the outcome my babies and I deserve. I now know who I am, who they are, and what I am up against. I do not plan on being nice anymore, now that I know how stupid nice is. I do not wonder if they love me (“they” will be revealed soon) and I know who my enemies are; so I no longer have limits.

My plan does not include revenge, although… JUSTICE FOR MY BABIES might end up looking like it.

I know I’m rambling again, but this is not pre-written…

This is coming from the depths of my heart to YOU… so please bare with me!

With that being said, let’s get started with today’s entry…

**Please be advised that my timeline may be off a little bit, but I will be putting it all together, ASAP!!**

My ex and I were at the end of our relationship. There were a lot of transitions going on between the 2 of us, and we both knew the relationship was one of them. I sat him down some time after Valentine’s day and let him know that I wanted to quit my job and break up with him officially. We hooked up for Valentine’s Day, but that would be the last time. I really only gave him that because I felt like it was kind of owed, since we were still together and living together. However, I wanted a new life without him. I was having issues at work and quite honestly, the energy of it all was draining me daily. So I was hoping that after the conversation he would do what I think is best for both of us… But it was a long shot.

So I pitched my idea to him..

I told him that not only did I want to quit my job and break up, but I also wanted to stop paying my half of the rent and be free for a couple months before I went back to work. I knew it was going to lead us right into a fight; we fought about EVERYTHING! I didn’t care, it was worth a shot. Afterall, I basically carried him throughout the 4+ year relationship, and he knew it! I wouldn’t let him forget it because it was the first and only time I did “50/50”. I knew then in my early 20’s that was a scam.. but I took a chance on him considering his age and how good he was to me emotionally. That was a lesson I’m glad I learned early.

To my surprise, he agreed to it. Then I took it a step further and asked him for an allowance… Knowing doggone well I just told him I’m cutting him off of “hook’n up” too. He bout cussed me out, so I didn’t push my luck. However, I was so ready to create a new life that I would love. We still argued a little bit, but it was less stress on me since that was my only worry. NO more bills… NO more working my tail off for little to nothing. Years before the buzz word became popular, I was going to live this soft life and take full advantage…. AND DID!

Until I met the Devil.

He wasn’t even my type, and I definitely was NOT thinking about him or any man for that matter. I was enjoying my single life and doing what I want when I want…. It was summer time too! Couldn’t tell me nothing. I was outside one day in the neighborhood looking for some tree (420). My dude wasn’t available and Im not the type to wait too long. So I started asking around to some of the guys I knew and they were all out. Until I called Derek with all the kids. He told me he was out but dude he was with had some so they would meet me at the pool. I had on this Orange tiger or leopard print haltered maxi dress that accentuated my curves and hid my flaws just right, my favorite summer time lounge dress. So when his fried saw me he IMMEDIATELY leaned back and said daaamn, what’s up girl… I responded with a nonchalant greeting, handing him my money so we can make the exchange. Again, I was not attracted to him. But he handed me a business card and told me to call him if I ever need that again.

I looked at the card and noticed it was promoting a mechanic business or something (mind you, he never worked on a piece of a car the entire time we were together). I put the card away for when I needed him again. Sure enough, a day or two later I was calling his phone cause my dude disappeared. He kept hitting on me over the course of a couple weeks as I went around to grab a bag from him. I just giggled and bat my eyes hoping for an extra gram or two. Eventually he hit me with some line about me being Hebrew and didn’t even know it. This peeked my interest because I was very much into the teaching’s he was referring to at the time.

One thing about me, I have strived for a better relationship with The Most High.

Another thing about me, is that I do not take my type that serious. I have always preferred mine medium ugly. I had stupid theory that they would appreciate and treat me better… A JOKE!!!!

But at the time, this theory gave me the mind to give this man a chance…

... and now we're here!

Until Next Time…