Cannibal! The Musical

Trey Parker and Matt Stone—two dudes who would soon become infamous for the unstoppable cultural nuke "South Park"—started their journey with this bizarre little project, Cannibal! The Musical. Now, if you’ve ever wondered what kind of movie two soon-to-be comedy titans make in college with a shoestring budget, bad wigs, and a bunch of snow, this is it. It’s crude, it’s cheap, and it’s completely hilarious in the most messed-up way possible.

Before “Oh my God, they killed Kenny!” became a household phrase that sent PTA moms into a moral tailspin, Parker and Stone were filming what’s essentially the Rocky Horror of cannibalism—complete with toe-tapping show tunes, cringe-worthy gore, and enough weirdness to make you wonder if you’re hallucinating. Based (very loosely) on the story of Alferd Packer, a prospector who ended up snacking on his traveling buddies after things went south, the film is a love letter to all things bad taste, shot with the enthusiasm of film students who gave no shits and knew they’d struck some sort of demented gold.

The acting? Bad. The costumes? Worse. But man, the charm is off the charts. Parker as Alferd Packer is like an innocent golden retriever who somehow found himself in a real-life nightmare. And the supporting cast? Picture live-action "South Park" characters, but with fewer brain cells and a higher tolerance for snow blindness. These aren’t just expeditioners, they’re walking punchlines, barfing up body parts while singing about how much fun they’re having. And that’s before they meet the “Trappers”—fur-clad lunatics who, of course, burst into Broadway-style show tunes. Naturally.

Then there’s the infamous horse, Leanne. Packer loves her—like, really loves her. Meanwhile, she’s off getting cozy with the smallest Trapper, whose idea of romance is singing about brick humping. It’s a special kind of weird, and I promise you, you’ve never seen anything quite like it. Oh, and let’s not forget the "Japanese Indians." Don’t ask. Just know that it’s another absurd joke in a movie that’s already straddling the fine line between genius and complete insanity.

By the time we hit the climax, with Polly Pry (the improbably lovely rescuer, played by Toddy Walters) getting the whole story from Packer’s bloodstained mouth, you’re left wondering what the hell you just watched—and yet, somehow, you feel kind of good about it. Uplifted, even. Yeah, it’s a movie about a dude who ate his friends, but Parker and Stone somehow turned it into the happiest little cannibal musical ever made.

Now, is Cannibal! The Musical a masterpiece of cinema? Hell no. It’s not even in the same league as Attack of the Killer Tomatoes. But it doesn’t need to be. It’s a goofy, sick, and sophomoric trip into the weirdness of college filmmaking, with a soundtrack that’ll worm its way into your head (whether you want it to or not). It looks like it was filmed on a budget of pocket change and ramen, but it’s that DIY spirit that makes it so damn fun.

For anyone who remembers the early days of "South Park" or misses that ‘90s Comedy Central vibe, this movie is a warped little time capsule. It’s got bad wigs, fake blood, ridiculous jokes, and it’s one of those “so-bad-it’s-good” movies that just feels like a warm, twisted hug from a simpler time.

Shpadoinkle indeed.

Released by Troma. Starring Trey Parker as Alferd Packer (credited as Juan Schwartz), Toddy Walters as Polly Pry, Matt Stone as James Humphrey (credited as Mathew Stone), Dian Bachar as George "California" Noon , Jason McHugh as Frank Miller , Jon Hegel as Israel Swan , Ian Hardin as Shannon Wilson Bell, and "Duster" as Packer's horse, Liane. Music by Trey Parker.

Cannibal! The Musical (1993) - Full Movie

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