YOUR PARTNER IS NOT YOUR ENEMY

Your partner is your ally, not your enemy.

In the early days of marriage, it feels much like the beginning of dating. Nothing seems more beautiful than your partner's beauty, nothing more impressive than your partner's strength. However, as time passes and the relationship matures, your partner's imperfections become more apparent. These imperfections aren't flaws—they're gaps that you're meant to fill. When you discover your partner's shortcomings, complete them. Didn't God create you to complement your partner's imperfections? God created you because He knew only you could fill what your partner lacks. God placed them beside you so your own imperfections could be completed by them. If you feel your partner isn't meeting your expectations, communicate this and guide them gently. Likewise, if you feel inadequate for your partner, strive to improve yourself. Many couples fail to understand this concept. Some relationships even end when imperfections are discovered. Perhaps many find other women or men more attractive. This happens because we've already identified our partner's shortcomings. The only solution is to convince ourselves that searching for perfection is futile, as everyone has imperfections. Therefore, instead of seeking perfection elsewhere, we should perfect the person already by our side.

Your partner was created for you, not as your enemy.

From the beginning, your enemy was never your partner but the ego within yourself. "I am right, but that doesn't mean you're wrong" and "I am wrong, but that doesn't mean you're right"—these statements mean that in a dispute, the winner isn't who proves themselves right, but who can lower their ego. When facing a problem, remember that the mindset we must have is "you and me versus the problem," not "me versus you." A relationship is like walking—if only one foot steps forward, we lose balance. If one leg is injured, the other must bear more weight to maintain equilibrium. Walk forward together to reach your shared destination. I believe negativity can be countered with positivity, including in relationships. During arguments, remember the happy days you've shared and how you've strived to make each other happy. If your partner upsets you, remember they're also the source of your happiness. And if they bring many problems, they simultaneously offer you wisdom. Let your strengths fill their weaknesses, and view their shortcomings as opportunities for you to complement them.

Your partner is entrusted to you by God, not your enemy.

God has entrusted someone to be your partner. He designed your partner's imperfections specifically so you could complete them. But don't view your partner solely through their flaws or negative traits. Consider this analogy: if goodness is symbolized by angels and evil by devils, then view your partner as human. Humans embody both good and evil. This means that as long as we recognize our own humanity (not the angel) and understand that our partners are also human (not the devils), we shouldn't always look for faults in them or rightness in ourselves. Right and left, up and down, hot and cold, day and night, you and your partner—all are opposites that cannot be separated. God doesn't want to hear your reasons for separation; He will test how strong your desire is to stay together.

Make peace with each other's egos and forgive one another. Conflict in relationships is natural. Argue as much as necessary, because at the end of each argument, we go through a process of forgiveness and mutual understanding. When you become accustomed to forgiving, acknowledging mistakes, and making improvements, you'll achieve a relationship that lasts until death separates you—and reunites in the afterlife.