The Insults in the Couple’s Relationship Do a Lot of Harm to the Closeness and Communication Between the Partners
Do you have the habit of insulting your partner?
About the insults in the couple relationship - the loved one is the one who can cheer us up or encourage us, knowing us so well, but it is sometimes the one who can hurt us very easily, just with one word! This is because his opinion about us matters a lot, and his influence on our mood is a major one.
Offenses in a couple's relationship hurt the closeness and communication between partners: it's hard for you to open up and talk to someone who has offended you, it's hard for you to feel affection for someone who made you feel horrible - even if he apologized then, even if you reconciled. An insult - an insult, a criticism, a nickname - cannot be easily forgotten, especially if it comes from a loved one, who should appreciate and accept us as we are…
About the insults in the couple's relationship:
Amid the heated quarrels, your anger can dominate, so if you think and act rationally it becomes impossible, if not impossible, then extremely difficult. When anger takes over your mind, you let go of the tide and thus end up saying or doing what you would not normally say and do.
Many times, we feel an almost absurd need to hurt the other person, to close his mouth with a sharp reply - so you even get to say what you don't believe, just to get an advantage in the fight. Sometimes you want to offend and hurt your partner when you quarrel so fiercely that you can't even think clearly - you just start to want to win the fight…
And because the couple's partners know each other so well, they can take advantage of each other's weaknesses, vulnerabilities in an argument: when you know what your partner is vulnerable to, you use his or her weakness to dominate him (e.g. and mischievous about his appearance, his profession or his studies, his family).
And you end up hurting exactly the person you normally wouldn't want to be sad about! It is a difficult situation - because even if you both know that the offender did not intend and does not believe what he said, even if an apology is asked, even if the quarrel passes and you reconcile, those words that offended and hurt the partner of the couple remain between you, like a wall that removes you and prevents you from finding harmony.
When you argue and are about to say something mean to shock or hurt the other person, you should stop for a minute and think about what you were going to say - do you think what you wanted to say ?; what effect would your wicked reply have had?; Do you solve something by insulting your partner?…
Unfortunately, it is often too late, because it is difficult when you let yourself be dominated by anger, to control yourself and think before you speak. But self-control can help you so that you can slowly control your anger and speak as rationally as possible.
Constant criticism. Offenses in a relationship do not only appear in the middle of heated arguments when you lose your composure and reason. They also appear in the form of criticisms often received from the couple's partner - more subtle or more direct criticism.
When the partner has what we sometimes call a "superiority complex" - he thinks he is much better than others, he only sees his qualities ignoring his flaws, he thinks he is always right, he values and accepts only his perspective on things, he is accustomed to judging those around him, to criticize them and to point out their flaws (which makes him feel better, better).
When you have such a partner, who sees the faults of others, but remains blind to his faults, you may be offended by his frequent criticism of you: because of course, you are not as good as him! And he feels the need to draw your attention when you're wrong or to remind you of your shortcomings - often saying he's doing it for your good to help you get better!
Remarks like "and you won't be able to", "you know very well that you won't be able to", "I wouldn't dress the way you look", "you don't know", "you don't understand like that something ", or even direct, appellative remarks:" you are so stupid/incapable/naive / etc. ".
The partner of the couple wants to draw your attention to your flaws and mistakes both to show his superiority and to gain some control over you: if he manages to convince you that he is, indeed, better than you and he knows better than you, then you will develop an addiction to him, you will feel that you need him.
Always enduring such criticism, such insults in the relationship can destroy your self-confidence, make you vulnerable and addicted. Therefore, it is best not to agree to be constantly criticized and cut your roots off - making it as clear as possible that your partner has his flaws and that you are not going to accept that he only comments on them. Yours!
An attitude of indifference and cold detachment. Offenses in a relationship can also refer to what your partner subtly conveys to you, through his attitude towards you. When you don't feel loved, appreciated, valued, wanted - on the contrary, you feel neglected, completely ignored, and undervalued, you can't help but feel offended and hurt.
Being in a couple in which your partner doesn't even notice you, in which the partner doesn't care what you have to say, in which they behave indifferently and as if you don't care, offends, hurts, and sabotages you. You should never accept the role of decorator or "good" lover, who is there just to satisfy the other's needs, otherwise being ignored…

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