humor
"Humor is what binds humans together and makes difficult times just a little less painful; Sometimes you can't help but laugh. "
6 HYSTERICAL WAYS TO ANNOY YOUR HUSBAND
I will be the firsts to admit , I love to annoy my husband. On most days I am just bored and need something to give me amusement. Like while your husband is in the shower, getting a whole bunch of flour and throwing it on him while he is still in the shower. And then run away laughing and laughing. And then upon finding his underwear on the floor you take chocolate pudding and smear that into the middle of those underwear. To make sure it looks like he------ his pants. Funny stuff right. I thought so. Well if you are ready I will let you have a list of my favorite things to do that annoy your husband.
By Adriane Kirby6 years ago in Humans
Pokémon Go vs Sex
Do you guys remember Pokemon Go? When that was like a global unification app, after Twitter. My (then) boyfriend was OBSESSED with it. We were about to have sex, I mean we were seconds away one time and his phone got a notification. He stopped and checked it.
By Mae McCreery6 years ago in Humans
Smile When You Say That
Well, it’s happened to me again, and I still don’t understand it. This time, I was in the bakery of my local supermarket, scanning the doughnuts, when suddenly view was cut off by a squat, bald man who had been talking to another woman. I moved aside and continued my sugar selection, when I heard a squat, bald voice say, “Smile. It can’t be all that bad.”
By Roberta Carly Redford6 years ago in Humans
The Midnight Snack
The Midnight Snack. My fingers tremble as I type I can scarcely believe a woman of my intelligence could find herself in this position. It is the seventh night in which my conscience robs me of peace. The bed sheets are knotted and damp with sweet perspiration. Instead of counting sheep I am counting wolves. A pack of wolves hot on the heel of their prey and it is me that they are hunting. Then I feel the warm breath on the back of my neck and it is then that I fall back down into my body deprived of sleeps sweet lullaby.
By Belladonna Eve Lamorte6 years ago in Humans
Quarantine Queen
1. You have yet to step out of your house in anything but slides. Step out of your Louis Boutons and into your slip on's. Comfort is key when it comes to keeping it cool this summer. You know how to rock any shoe with your capsule wardrobe and that doesn't exclude a one step - low key slipper.
By Ellie Fowler6 years ago in Humans
Captain Oh Yeah
I was wearing my black, collared, slick, long sleeve shirt that I had just bought from the Gap to show it off on that particular Friday evening. It made my beer gut look like it was gone (you know how wearing the color black makes chunky people look a little thinner), and it gave me this mysterious panther-like look while all the silver rings I was wearing on my lanky fingers embellished the blackness of this awesome shirt. This particular shirt was a huge girl magnet too. By far, it was my favorite shirt for a long time.
By Bazooka Teaches6 years ago in Humans
The Wipe
I was out with my girlfriend at a bar in Hollywood drinking and celebrating. It was a “whatever” night for us to celebrate that night. Suddenly, I had the urge to take a number-two (yes a big ol’ dump), and I really didn’t want to do it because pinching a loaf at a public place, especially a bar, is just embarrassing. However, this loaf was coming out like a bat out of Hell.
By Bazooka Teaches6 years ago in Humans
Coming or Going
i WOULDNT say I saw it coming becaus I never did. I’ve always had good relationships with the dudes I messed with, I wouldn’t call them EXCEPTIONAL OR TYPICAL, but I was in love and I was happy in my eyes so i was Me! I know I treat my man the way he deserves. So I get treated equally good. But yet this one guy came in and After that, shit will nevva be the same...
By FairyTailDora6 years ago in Humans
