Strength In Solitude

Sometimes it takes losing nearly everyone you love to realize how precious life truly is.

All too often we take for granted those who are sitting right next to us, we bury our face in our phones, or preoccupy ourselves with things that mean little compared to those we love. I told my wife years ago, prior to her passing "In The End I Stand Alone".

When I made this statement to my wife, it was not to hurt her feelings, or make her feel as though I felt as though I was alone at that time, it was said through a spontaneous vocalization of an emotion that I felt which resonated from my own future. I never would have thought in my worst nightmares that those words would be so profoundly true until they became my reality.

I am now 40 years old, and I have lost every person I have ever loved in my life aside from my last living brother and two younger sisters, but although they are still living, they are so wrapped up in their own life's and circumstances, that despite the fact they are still on this earth, I have spent the last 5 years in near total solitude. I have learned through losing so many beautiful souls, that the time we have here is monumentally precious and I no longer waste my moments in trivial pursuits or chasing things that don't truly matter on a fundamental level.

In being exposed to what used to feel like deafening silence, I have found strength that I never knew I possessed, but when you have no one else to give your time or attention to, you find that the best option that is left is to begin devoting time towards the endeavor of improving yourself, and healing from those traumatic experiences which have taken place in the past. Healing has been my most ambitious goal since my wife passed away, and since that time I have discovered more about myself than I did in the prior 36 years.

When you find yourself alone in a world that is becoming more and more socially isolating, or even if you yourself feels as though you are socially ostracized, I can't express enough to turn your focus inward and begin the process of self actualization or as Carl Yung termed it, Individuation. When you learn to know yourself in the way that you seek to know others you find that there is so much more to you than the past conditioning has allowed you to experience, and when you begin rewiring your own neural network through present centered attention, and shadow work, you begin healing from things that you may not have realized were ever even there.

Sometimes it takes spending many moments in silent solitude to find the strength, resilience, and fortitude that is necessary for you grow in such a way that allows you to become who you are meant to be, instead of who society has told you that you are supposed to be. Seeking happiness in the material world, in my experience has never yeilded true fulfillment, but has instead brought chaos into life after momentary dopamine hits have passed once the initial newness of whatever that material possession may be, wears off.

True fulfillment is found in the relationships we build, not just with others, but with ourselves as well. I encourage everyone who may read this to take time to truly get to know yourself, for when you allow yourself the time, and space to know who you are on a fundamental and intimate level, you are able to be so much more for not just yourself, but others as well.

Only When You Know Yourself, Will You Become Known.

Brightest Blessings.