She's just a girl and...

Upon stumbling on this challenge, I did a bit of research on my sign. Something significant enough for other people to find any kind of value in while reading. Just a few days ago my coach and mentor gave me a task to share a gratitude peace for the week. I moved across the world (literally) in pursue of my dream and all these things others find inspirational, I find “normal”. It was just how my life was and how my life is. But now, combining that gratitude peace with this small note of my zodiac sign, Leo, I decided to combine it into one. For my coach, for the readers but most importantly for myself. At least for once since I’ve moved countries.

“Turned to themselves for the most part, they tend to become independent as soon as possible. Still, a Leo will do anything to protect their loved ones, proud of their ancestry and roots in good and bad times.”

Wow! What a piece this is! Just like it is with me! I do not wish to go into greater details but this part about being proud of my roots in good and bad times… Just wow!

As this picture shows a father holding his son on his shoulders… That is one of my fewer memories of my father. I was not a boy, just his son! See, he always wanted a boy! But I was his first child, a little girl. He didn’t really pay much attention to it though! He raised me like he would a son! He taught me all about soccer back in the days, with sticks and old clothes for the ball as we couldn’t afford a real ball. That day, we were at a concert and he held me like this! I was way too young when he passed away, but this is one of the things I kept close to my heart.

After his death, me and my five siblings struggled to live with only mum providing for us. After a call of our neighbor that our mother wasn’t home and we were all by ourselves, the police with social security came to take us and place us “somewhere better”. And that’s exactly what happened!!

We were placed in this amazing place, where we were loved and got an actual chance to become good, loving people. This organization along the way had young people talking around the world about how to make it a better place and that is how I got involved with the reality of understanding how lucky I was.

Seeing all these young people with similar destinies, I started happily representing my new home. To the point where people around me laughed how much I supported it, they said they would have to stop me from going as it may look like I was pushing for kids to live there instead of their families. Of course, to this day, I always feel that lack of family in my life. But deep down inside, I love the way my life has turned out being.

It was, it is, and it will be hard. Things like this follow you forever. But I always greatly appreciated it all, in times of hardship as well as in times of happiness. It was just there, inside of me. I never decided on it. I was truly always doing things by myself, even when asking for people’s opinions and help. I became independent from an early age, always making decisions, taking challenges, creating my life. That is how I ended up here.

But I also highly value my family, my siblings and my friends that feel like family to me as I often searched for family in my friends. Often even their families made me feel like I was a daughter of their own, my best friend’s mother even calling me their third daughter. To kind of speak of some destiny that is connected to all these to human unknown things, I will share a story of a third daughter.

See, I love protecting people I love. This thing got it right again! As I was always a strong girl, I had it kind of imbanded in me to follow my friend’s home. I lived in this small town and my best friend lived around 15 minutes from school (I lived around 6). I would go all the way to her place, talk for hours in front of her apartment and then go back home. Sometimes, we would drop upstairs and talk to her parents, grandma, and her sister.

My name is Ana, this will be important for the story. So, I was really close to them and my friend because you kind of must go to school almost every day. But we were together every day, always the same routine. When not in school, she would pick me up and I would end up going with her again after our walks. I swear, I think we walked the distance I moved in those four years of high school. And, as it was, one night we went upstairs to her parents. I loved talking to her dad as he and I shared love for soccer. He had two daughters and they didn’t ever care about things like that. Her grandma would obsess over us two not having boyfriends as even her younger sister found one before us.

That day, we went into a bit of an emotional setting. It was a cold winter day and we talked about things we always do. Her dad was often watching soccer in the other room as us girls spoke of boys, dreams, and school. He came and joined us. As we were talking, he shared something I never heard from my best friend. He told me that they wanted only two kids and that my friend wasn’t the oldest one.

He told me that they had a baby before her, but she died after she was born. He then said something that makes me cry every time I remember it, even now I am writing it - “You always make sure our daughter comes home safe. You know, we were going to call her Ana. But it seems like our daughter has an older sister after all. The stars always find a way to give what’s needed to be given.”

That broke me, in a positive way. And I am happy it is like that because she might have not had another younger sibling. We really were like sisters back in the day.

She’s still my friend to this day, one of my longest ones too as I moved a lot when I was young. All these things are really things I love about myself. Even though we humans find it hard to love ourselves, I am so grateful for these things. Being able to feel such a connection with others, such power and willingness to protect them. Being able to love my roots and my family no matter how hard it sometimes gets. It is a lot easier to be proud of all of it when it’s the good times, of course. But I hope there are other Leo’s who found solitude in reading this.

I am not of Zodiac kind of people, but this really felt good. I like to believe we all can feel all these things. That it is in us all to be able to connect to all these feelings. And if it’s said it is easier for us Leo’s to do so, so be it. But I believe everyone can. I believe that all of you who read this can. I hope that reading this little piece can make you guys feel some part of it right now, as you read it. For we all need to be grateful for our traits and embrace them more. Maybe this makes us do it more often? Maybe you reading this was written somewhere in the stars? Maybe it was a part of our destiny? But regardless of it all, whether it’s because I’m a Leo or not, these really hit the button with me! It really did!