Navigating Beyond the Wreckage

The following is an excerpt from a “parting” letter to a “mentor” of sorts, with whom I had the privilege of communicating with for a decade. Through her, I gained immeasurable wisdom, valuable life insights, and, most importantly, the ability to genuinely love and value myself. It doesn’t do justice to say I don’t know where I’d be without her, because, honestly, I was headed down a path to “nowhere.”

Dear Anna,

I have always considered myself a levelheaded person, even in my most chaotic moments. However, there was a long period when my perception of reality became quite skewed.

I felt my options were limited, almost depleted. I began to believe I was becoming a burden—to myself and to those around me. I knew my loved ones didn’t see me this way, but I thought they were simply too kind to notice. Give them time, I thought, and they would begin to understand.

Something in me couldn’t give up just yet, though. I wasn’t quite sure what that driving force was, but I knew it was there.

In a last, desperate attempt, I tried to reassess my situation from an outside perspective, searching for a broader outlook, one not entirely driven by emotional turmoil. When I began examining things with the awareness that my view might be distorted, I found the glimmer of hope I had been searching for. It was right there all along, actually.

It was you.

From the first day I met you, I saw something in you that I admired and respected. I felt safe and heard in your presence.

You’re a true inspiration, a beautiful soul, and wise beyond words. I’ve always held you and your opinion in such high regard. And while you’ve always believed in me, it goes beyond just support. You see something in me; you believe in it wholeheartedly.

You not only supported me but also encouraged the exploration of my creativity and eccentricities.

You valued my many talents, always reminding me to value them as well. You helped me sift through the chaos and uncover the beauty within it.

You especially took a genuine interest in my writings and ideas, finding them thought-provoking and profound. For example, when you asked my permission to use my quotes and ideas in one of your classes (giving credit to “someone you knew who was a beautiful writer and quite wise”), it wasn’t just to be polite—I could tell you genuinely loved them. You found wisdom in my ideas. Words can’t adequately describe the pride I felt in that moment, or in any moment when I reflect upon it. As much as I look up to you, you’ll never truly know how much that meant to me.

In my darkest times, that glimmer of hope came from your unwavering insistence that there was more to me than I could see. It came from your undying belief in me and your genuine interest in the things I’m passionate about. It came from actions that backed up your words, solidifying the value you found in me. It came from your persistent refusal to give up on me and your genuine patience and care.

To me, you’re far too wise to be so adamant about something that isn’t grounded in reality. And you believed in me. You refused to give up on me. How could I not at least try?

So, Anna, thank you for being the life raft I could hold onto when I felt like I was drowning. Thank you for not only reminding me that I knew how to swim but also providing lessons on better navigating the waves life throws at me.

Thank you for refusing to give up on seeing the value of my creative endeavors and introspective thoughts, even when I couldn’t. Your belief was the fuel I needed when I was running on empty.

Thank you for giving me someone to believe in—that someone was myself; it took me a long time to see that, but I finally did.

Most importantly, thank you for giving me the gift of life. You were the light I needed when I was suffocating in total darkness. I couldn’t fathom being stuck there any longer, but I couldn’t see a way out…until I met you.

I truly am grateful that I stayed around long enough to see both the beauty I possess and the array of possibilities that await me.

The only way out is in. -Sadhguru

This was your parting message in our last phone call. It’s just one of the many pieces of wisdom you have shared that I often reflect upon as I continue to navigate my way through life.

Thank you for helping me find my way back to my core self. 💜