How can we get through grief?

Unfortunately, losing a loved one is something that we will experience sooner or later. Suffering this loss can be one of life's most painful experiences . Thus, it is normal for us to feel lost and overwhelmed by pain. This is a normal process that we must go through.

Unfortunately, there is no specific guide of steps to follow. Nor is there a magic formula to make the process easy.

Do we all handle grief in the same way?

The short answer is no. The long answer is: it depends. It depends on how we are each and every one. Each person is in a certain way, they have a specific history that conditions their way of managing their circumstances . And we do it the best we know how.

It is not the same to go through a loss without having experienced it first, than to live it when we have already had that experience. It is also not the same when we are aware that death is likely due to disease, because we can somehow expect it. However, when the death is sudden, due to an accident at work, for example, we will not experience it in the same way.

It also depends on how our relationship with the being we have lost has been . Each relationship is unique, and each person occupies a certain role in our lives. The relationship we have with our parents, for example, is not the same as the one we have with our partner. Thus, depending on the type of relationship, the grieving process may be different.

What we should know about grief

Surely many people will tell you about their grieving experiences and tell you, with their best intentions, how you should feel and what you should do. As a result, our experience is likely to be so different that we feel guilty for not crying or think that we are too weak to suffer so much.

Nothing is further from reality. We have already seen that the grieving process is something unique that depends on many things. That is why all the emotions we experience are valid. And what we experience will be different from the experience of other people. Thus, what matters is how we feel and what we decide to do .

How to make the difficult duel a more bearable experience?

First of all, remember that there is no magic formula for grieving. Here are some suggestions to make it a little easier:

1. Let off steam

Do not keep your emotions to yourself because, although it is painful, it is also healthy to share how you feel with those closest to you . Keeping it to yourself will likely make the process more difficult and take longer. However, when you express it and share, you will notice that the experience is more bearable.

2. Do not judge how you feel

As we have seen, each person has a different experience of grief and all the emotions we feel are valid. Therefore, it is important that you stop judging yourself and allow yourself to feel your emotions. This will help you recover faster .

3. Don't isolate yourself

Surely you don't want to go out and stay at home, and it's normal. There's nothing wrong with giving us time. However, it is necessary that we go out and little by little we relate to those who matter to us . Thus, we will feel supported and we will also be distracted.

4. Do enjoyable activities

When we go through a difficult grief and we feel a lot of pain, it is good that we take a break and do activities that we find pleasant. Thanks to this, you will notice that it will help you recover your life more easily.

5. Don't stop your life

Although it may be difficult for you, moving on with your life will make it easier for you to return to a more normal situation. At first, it is normal that we do not have the strength to continue. However, by staying like this, the duel will be more difficult for us. On the contrary, if you start small and move on with your life, you will likely find that you can move on , and you will learn to live with that loss.

6. Go to a professional

Facing a duel in a healthy way often implies going to a psychologist who will help you in an objective and personalized way.