Thunderbolts

When the cast of characters for Thunderbolts was first announced I was immediately skeptical because I truly hate when things happen off screen. And John Walker did not do enough by the end of Falcon and the Winter Soldier for Bucky to just be chill being on a team with him. So I definitely went into this movie with some reservations. The internet raved about it, but the general public is so often wrong, especially when it comes to comic book movies that it did nothing to ease my concerns.

Florence Pugh can do no wrong, I love this woman in everything that she is in. She is such a brilliant actress. Also I love that they open with Yelena, they know she is the one we are all here to see. That’s how good Florence is, in 1 film she captured all of us so intensely.

“You guys can never aim for shit”, god I love her. She took the guinea pig. This girl is my favorite.

Congressmen Barnes, interesting way to take his character but I guess I see the vision. The thing is that all elected officials are inherently public and that just seems like he is shoving himself so far out of his comfort zone, and yes he had a lot of personal growth during Falcon and Winter Soldier…but not that much.

Also…Yelena and Alexi haven’t seen each other in a year, but the last time we saw the both of them was in Black Widow where they really pushed the family angle. So Yelena opens up and forces the rest of her family to acknowledge their feelings and then…they don’t see each other for a year? Sorry that doesn’t track. They really didn’t write the off screen stuff very well. If things are going to happen off screen you HAVE to acknowledge them and explain them on screen. Which is telling and not showing so that’s inherently bad writing but it's slightly better than doing neither.

God I hate John Walker. I don’t think they can write a character arc that would change that…I don’t think anyone can write a character arc that would change that.

We gave a few different levels of power here, John Walker with the super soldier serum, Yelena whose a widow, taskmaster who is everything, and Ghost which is a weird addition since we haven't seen her since Ant-Man and Wasp…too much is happening. Someone went “ya know what would be cool” and with no other thoughts in that writers room we ended up with this chaos.

Now this group of people challenging the system that wrongfully created them is a good jumping off point for this plot. However, killing Taskmaster off so quickly was a HUGE mistake.

Ya know since this version of the Thunderbolts was never in the comics anyway and we are simply stealing the name, I would have much preferred this movie be Yelena, Ghost, Taskmaster and Bucky…and that’s it. Why are we trying to make John Walker happen? Even in the MCU sanitized version of his character he sucks.

Don’t you dare try and give Yelena a love interest, not a male one, that woman is a lesbian and I will not tolerate anything else.

I will say at least they draw attention to the fact that Walker was never really Captain America and he sucked at it.

If this whole movie is Yelena’s mental health journey I am here for it. I wish more films would do this and she is the perfect vehicle for it.

Bucky reattaching his arm and swinging it around was unnecessarily hot.

John Walker being an asshole and immediately suffering consequences is quite honestly the best thing ever.

John Walker is totally the asshole to read news stories about himself and also be a terrible dad, this all tracks.

So Bob’s power is to force flashbacks tied to their current emotional state it seems. However he also seems to be bullet proof and have the ability to fly. Okay he’s Sentry…having the Thunderbolts bring in a character like Sentry was a batshit crazy decision. I don’t know why I didn’t figure that out earlier, I think I was hearing Project Century and not Sentry…like my brain stalled out a little.

Alexi screaming “Yelena, it’s your dad” is in fact the most dad shit ever.

We are almost halfway through this movie and it doesn’t feel like we are in act 2, we are dragging a little bit.

Bucky always has the best entrances, I love watching that man ride a motorcycle. Full body goosebumps…so hot.

The fact that Bucky is so casually so much better then all of them is even better. He’s just so effortlessly awesome. The super soldiers being noun with rope and rebar is the funniest shit I’ve ever seen.

Ya know I don’t really think that I am attracted to Sebastian Stan, I am however VERY attracted to Bucky Barnes.

Yeah glad we are all acknowledging that Bucky as a congressman was ridiculous.

Great comic book accurate costume for Sentry, seriously that was some good work.

Sorry…one training scene in a few hours and Sentry has full mastery of all his powers? We are focusing energy and screen time on the wrong parts of this story.

Unfortunately, using the Thunderbolts (a very limited superhero team) to introduce and take down Sentry (the most powerful character the MCU has ever introduced) is inherently flawed. Because even in the comic book universe where rules are flexible there is no feasible way to make this make even a remote amount of sense.

Sentry turns into the Void and this was a very interesting adaptation choice. It's a very vivid visual representation of depression and addiction, which is incredible writing…or it would be if we spent less time on the punchy punchy and more time with Robert and his background.

The writing of this movie is kind of a mess. We are missing too many important pieces, the pacing is slow as hell and too much is happening off screen that should be happening on screen.

Yelena I love you but this giant concrete slab they are all pushing has 3 super soldiers, what are you really contributing to this?

I do love that we are focusing on Yelena for much of this movie, and that is the only reason for Alexi’s inclusion in the film at all. I think they had some good ideas that were tied together and overall developed poorly.

The escape sequence through the shadow dimension is pretty good. This is probably something that should have happened in some form with just Robert a little earlier, probably as he was unlocking his powers as Sentry. It would have made the fact that they are now all together in the shadow realm a lot more impactful. The MCU is a little bit known for structural issues so it doesn’t surprise me that they put the pieces in the wrong places but it still bothers me.

All flaws are forgiven because Florence Pugh is so hot.

People really think this is the movie that saved the MCU? The general public has horrendous taste and are too stupid to realize why they are wrong. Honestly the movie is a 7/10 at best, too much fundamental structure stuff was weird and wrong. Really over Marvel’s inability to show and not tell, even more over them not showing or telling. It was a sloppily written script that was held together with fans love for Yelena and Bucky and Florence Pugh’s raw talent.