Drive-Away Dolls: A Disastrous Detour in Exploitive Territory

We need to get on the road now.

Drive-Away Dolls spun into theaters in 2024. Jaime and Marian take an impromptu road trip to find excitement. They cross paths with criminals, steal, and enjoy some merriment.

I have never been happier for a movie to end so I could sprint out of the theater. This film is a BIG miss. Drive-Away Dolls is NOTHING of what the trailer was. It’s not even close to the trailer’s crime premise. Thus far, this is the worst film of 2024! Drive-Away Dolls is an oversexualized lesbian porn film.

Margaret Qualley and Geraldine Viswanathan are two talented actresses. They play the outspoken Jamie and reserved Marion. The pair have fun dynamics, but their characters are not explored enough—just their sex lives. While we get some backstory on Marion (on her sexuality), Jamie needs more backstory.

Qualley has already proved her versatility as an actress. Compare this wild and voracious personality to her reserved and polite characters in the Netflix series Maid or My Salinger Year. I have only seen Viswanathan in Cat Person, where she instilled a vital portrayal of roommate etiquette. Viswanathan does incredible work with her countenance.

I liked the supporting cast more than Jamie and Marion. Credits include Beanie Feldstein, Joey Slotnick, C.J. Wilson, Colman Domingo, and Bill Camp (the most memorable). I’m still trying to understand why Pedro Pascal and Matt Damon appeared in a dismal film like this. I almost walked out before Damon’s cameo at the very end of the film!

I’ll tell you what I would have paid to see. Joey Slotnick and C.J. Wilson (Arliss and Flint) were the best comical relief as two goons after the women. Writers need to take better risks in their choice of perspective. Of course, they do the usual Harry and Marv bickering, but they had a more compelling storyline than Jamie and Marion.

Drive-Away Dolls had no idea what direction it was taking. Any hope of that gripping crime story is forever lost in this gratuitous and explicit lesbian porn. I’m not knocking on the LGBTQ community because I am happy that more LGBTQ-focused storylines have evolved. This is not the right film!

It has no story! It’s one sex scene after the next. There’s a lot of explicit nudity. This film is not even 90 minutes. A LOT was padded. By that, I mean A LOT of sex scenes, make-out sessions, and the most ridiculous reveal in that suitcase. These explicit scenes serve no purpose, only catering to a specific audience, rather than a genuine effort to the narrative.

Okay, here’s one opinion that I’m surprised other viewers haven’t enjoyed. The editing for the film is quirky. When a scene ends, the screen tilts or spins like a dice into the next. This style is rare, especially for a comedy. That doesn’t give it the credit because the film’s is a disaster for its sexual content.

I am embarrassed to have watched this movie in a theater. Was this meant for the right platform? This is Ethan Coen’s first solo direction and it does not match the tone of any of his films. Everything is underdeveloped. This film would have fared better had it concentrated on storytelling and character development.

What have films come to now? I want to see epic adventures with meaningful messages. Somehow, I made it to the end of Drive-Away Dolls (barreling out before the credits). This film deserves a complete rewrite into the crime-thriller that we deserved. Heed my warning, save your eyes and avoid Drive-Away Dolls.