Deadpool & Wolverine

"Whose balls did I have to fondle to get my very own movie? I can't tell you but it rhymes with Pulverine..."

TL;DR: It's a sequel, and it's Deadpool. These two facts tell you everything you need to know. You will go into the film with precisely the correct level of expectation. If you're not a fan of Deadpool, you'll hate it. If you don't really like sequels, then this isn't going to blow you away. Hot tip: for best results, watch while fully awake.

I don't mind a good sequel, or a good reboot. Terminator 2 is on my top five all time favourites. Toy Story 2 was a revelation.

My beef is that I've noticed that's almost all cinema is anymore. There are hardly any original films, even fewer good ones. Fewer still that are original stories in their own right, and not an adaptation of a novel or a comic book book or a TV series. Everything is a follow on from something else, or a remake. Is it so bad to have a hankering for something new and exciting?

I went to see the midnight showing. 00:05AM on the day of release, I was there, propping open my eyelids with matchsticks and regretting my life choices.

The fact I still enjoyed it even though I was feeling a bit jaded, and I stayed awake and engaged throughout despite being extremely bloody tired, should tell you it's a hoot and a half.

The highs...

Reynolds, God's perfect idiot

Come on, he's an absolute dude, and he's perfect for this. I think he is to Deadpool as Cavill is to The Witcher. He cares about the source material, and it shows. It bleeds over into every part of the project. We can see it, and it's delightful.

Jackman

He's great in everything, but, this, his portrayal of Wolverine, is surely his magnus opus. He's nailed it, from the first. No matter who you are, whether this is your cup of tea or not, it's just an objective fact. Most sane people have loved him since this moment:

Reynolds + Jackman

I am so glad we got to see the two of them on screen like this. The two of them together is *chef's kiss*.

The Nostalgia

I adore all the pop culture references. I love the nostalgia and all the call-backs to the earlier Wolverine movies. I love all the references to the 90s and early 2000's (incidentally the first X-Men movie came out in 2000).

I love that this film acknowledges the original comic book superheroes that got adapted for the big screen, in all their cheesy glory. The OGs, the trailblazers, the 90s icons. Some of them didn't quite land, in fact some of them downright flopped, some never even made it. Still: they were part of a cinematic movement that brought us some absolute bangers. For that alone they deserve another five minutes in the spotlight, and D&W gives that to them.

Dogpool

"Peggy", the runt no one wanted who is now a star, and a walking, slobbering, heart-warming reminder that the thing that makes you stand out can be the thing that makes you outstanding.

Adorable, right?

The Choreography

It's great! Not just the fight scenes either, the dancing is also pretty impressive.

The humour

It's about what you'd expect. Wildly irreverant from the get-go. Lots of adlibbing, plenty of self-deprecation. They take the mickey out of themselves, each other, and Disney fairly relentlessly. I love the fourth wall breaks, the sarcasm, the whole "merc with a mouth" bit. I love the insults, the improv, the Spider-Man impressions.

They're going to make him do this until he's ninety...

The Costumes

They're all pretty good, but I especially love Wolverine's! The second I saw the trailer, I was right back in 2000, sniggering when Cyclops said,

What would you prefer? Yellow spandex?

The cameos

If you were delighted with Brad Pitt's in Deadpool 2, you are going to soil yourself this time around. We have Chris Evans, Wesley Snipes, Henry Cavill, Matthew McConaughey, Blake Lively, Nathan Fillion, Dafne Keen, Channing Tatum...

I'm soaking wet right now.

The big heroic moment

There's a point near the end which put me in mind of Hawkeye and Black Widow in End Game. If you know, you know. Brilliantly done.

The care

The attention to detail is excellent. The people making this film care about it. I mean, OK, yes, they probably also care about money, but they care about what they're doing as well, and it shows. They know who the audience are, and they care about making something those people are happy with.

The credits

If you're a Marvel fan, I don't need to tell you: stay for the credits! If you've been watching these movies as they were released for the last 20+ years... Oof, man. The nostalgia. I cannot.

There were probably grown men in that theatre who'd read these comics when they were little kids, and then, as young men, waited eagerly for every movie release. Excited to see who would bring their actual childhood heroes to life, and how they'd do it. How those guys weren't sobbing in the aisles, I'll never know.

The Soundtrack

What a banger! They played a blinder getting the Madonna track. Perfect on every level, it just works. It strikes exactly the right mood, and the religious overtone lends perfectly to the whole Marvel Jesus thing. Could not have picked better.

The lows

(Spoilers follow. You have been warned.)

The Story

I know right, such a foundational thing, and it was a bit wobbly for me. It was really just a vehicle for everything. Reynolds, Jackman, their chemistry, the fight scenes, special effects, and self-deprecating, fourth-wall breaking humour. Overall, it was done well enough that I didn't mind about the shaky foundation.

I did feel kind of bad for not liking the story, and then I saw this bit from Reynolds:

The mid-life crisis

The lowest point for me is the start. Wade's been turned down for the job he wanted, Ness has left him, it's all gone to shit, really. This isn't bad, as such. It's not poorly done, or anything. It's supposed to be a downer.

It's weird, isn't it? We can enjoy Superman bested by kryptonite. On some level, we relish seeing Thor have his hammer taken away from him. Taking the super out of the hero and introducing a little bit of mild peril, a catalyst for some personal growth... We lap it up, and we think, oh boy, how will s/he get out of this one? But this feels a step too far.

Who wants to see their hero really diminished? His grit and ambition taken away. Who wants to look at the silver screen and see a sad reflection of themselves, or a future version of themselves? Despite his healing factor, he's now an aging has-been, an over-the-hill ex-champion. A mediocre salesman stapled into a bad wig. Adequate effort. It's uncomfortable viewing.

Happily, this part doesn't last long! Deadpool is told that, with Logan gone, the timeline is disintegrating and his world is going to end. He says, "nope" and goes on a mission to bring a Wolverine from another timeline to fix the problem.

My greatest disappointment

Nobody called anybody a cock-juggling thundercunt.

The meh

The scrapping between the two of them went on a bit too long, and there was a lot of... squelching. Don't get me wrong, I love them together, it was just a bit.... gory. And penetrative. They both heal fast, so what's the point in all the stabbing? Guys, we get it. Get a room.

I didn't care enough about one of the bad guys, Mr Paradox. He wasn't villainous enough for me. He was just.... accountant-y. Maybe that's what they were shooting for. Cassandra is pretty villainous, though, as villains go, which makes up for it.

Summing up...

Flawed, but still good. Despite my hesitation over a sequel, my dire need for caffeine, and the story not being amazing... there are enough laughs, shiny things, crowd-pleasers, and easter eggs to keep me happy for several viewings. If you like Deadpool, it's definitely worth a look. Did I enjoy it as much as The Fall Guy? I don't feel comfortable answering that question.

+

Thank you for reading!