11 Movies I Pretend to be Familiar With

There are a lot of movies widely considered classics by the public at large. I want to talk about these, except from the perspective of someone who has never seen them. It's not that I disagree with them being considered classic, it's that I didn't see them growing up, and still haven't gotten around to it because I'm busy re-watching Shrek. So I go on about my life and when they come up in conversation, I make vague comments and participate solely based off Wikipedia research and memes. Each title includes a photograph from Unsplash that represents what the named movie is about in my mind.

1. Forrest Gump

When I was younger I used to run a lot, so I got used to random people shouting "run Forrest run!" as I passed them by. Everyone has seen this movie, and it is widely regarded as one of the greatest films of all time. I honestly cannot believe I have never seen this film, because growing up I bore a loose resemblance to Tom Hanks. At least from a distance. In high school I even dressed as him from Castaway for Halloween, walked around the halls in bare feet and smudged coffee grinds into my cut-up clothing while carrying around a volleyball.

Forrest Gump is definitely a movie I want to see, I just haven't got around to it. Alternative history novels are a large bulk of my reading collection, so from my limited knowledge of the plot, I love the idea of watching Forrest be present during key moments in history.

2. Breakfast at Tiffany's

So I recently learned (from my wife) that the Tiffany's in this film is in fact the jewelry brand, and that this story is not about a greasy diner owned by a witty lady named Tiffany.

I don't really have an idea of the plot, but if Breakfast at Tiffany's is even half as good as the song named after it by Deep Blue Something, then this is definitely one I should check out.

3. Silence of the Lambs

Full disclosure, I have a hard time watching horror movies. Yes I have been told this one is not full of jump scares but is more scary on a psychological level. The image I selected is solely based off the reference from How I Met Your Mother where they discuss who is their personal "pit person".

I technically did watch this movie when I was ten years old, watching it with friends when we had a sleepover in a trailer. I wasn't scared at all, because we watched it in reverse at high-speed by rewinding the VHS with the screen on. I have not revisited it since because I am still a large child.

4. The Shining

Yeah, this one seems way to scary for me to check out. I was freaked out enough with the references to it in the cinematic release of Ready Player One.

5. Jaws

Nope.

I lived in Australia for a little bit, a place where I would regularly surf. Despite the overwhelming statistics that the risk of being attacked by a shark is lower than being hit by a car (a thing I drive almost everyday), I have never had the urge to watch a movie that would make me too terrified to go near the ocean. Also, I see sharks as majestic creatures, and I don't have an inclination to taint that view. I like to think so long as I respect their space, they wish me no harm.

When I was swimming over the Great Barrier Reef, I went into open water with my dad. We saw a shark, and started swimming back to the boat as fast as we could. The Jaws theme played in my head. We made it back, to the sounds of the captain laughing at us, "it's just a grey nurse shark mates, completely harmless! No worries!"

Still not watching Jaws.

6. Titanic

I think I've never watched Titanic out of the fear that it would make me sad. From what I understand about it, a film displaying the large class gap in society that ends with a poor boy dying because there isn't enough space for him?

Damn, that is way too real.

7. Pulp Fiction

I know it's supposed to be cool, I know it's supposed to be slick. I'm betting that it really is. I just haven't watched it yet. I don't have much to say on this one because all I've heard about it is how wild and confusing the plot is, which does intrigue me. I'm also somewhat aware of all the references to it throughout pop culture today that fly right over my head.

8. 2001: A Space Odyssey

Looking this one up I was surprised to see it was released in 1968 and how much it is praised for it's technological achievements, which I hear are impressive even by today's standards.

Also can't believe I haven't seen it because, c'mon. It's about space. Space is super cool. Which leads me to the next pick on my list of movie's I've never seen before...

9. Star Wars

Just kidding!

9. A Clockwork Orange

Does watching the beginning of Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny count towards watching A Clockwork Orange?

The film is said to paint a dystopian Britain where gangs roam the streets and the government conducts experiments on its citizens.I think I've avoided it solely based off how violent people have told me it is.

10. Donnie Darko

This one might top my list of movies I've never seen but really want to watch. I haven't because I'm assuming that it is going to freak me out for weeks after watching it. I'm aware that there is some sort of spectral rabbit that he sees in the story but I haven't looked into it any further because this is one I do plan on building up the nerve to actually sit down and watch and I don't want to spoil it.

11. The Godfather

This is the godfather (I'm so sorry) of all movies that I pretend to be familiar with. I've heard that the second one is better? Either way I haven't seen either, or the third for that matter. There's only three, right? I think that I understand most of the references people make to it in tv shows and other movies purely from seeing so many references but I have never actually watched the movies that inspired all those moments.

There it is. I'm finally admitting that if I've ever spoken to you regarding the above-mentioned films, I was lying to you. There's a chance I'll get to checking them out one day, that is unless they do release Shrek the Fifth, because then I would be too busy. Some of you reading this might be in the same boat as me, getting by with vague knowledge of others' favourite films. Some of you reading this were probably loudly guffawing in disbelief that I could be so inconsiderate as to not have already taken the time to experience such monumental moments in cinema.