10 Behaviors You Should Never Tolerate in a Relationship

10 Behaviors You Should Never Tolerate in a Relationship

Relationships should be fulfilling and nourishing at the same time. This applies to all relationships, but romantic ones especially. You should be able to count on your partner to love and care for you. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case. We can get stuck in relationships in which we’re incompatible, or you may find yourself with a partner who’s causing you more harm than good. If you’re single, the following behaviors will provide insight into what you should look out for to avoid heartache and pain. And if you’re in a relationship, this will allow you to better appreciate your mate or identify what’s been going wrong, so you can do something about it. Here are 10 behaviors you should never tolerate in a relationship!

Number 1 - They Lie All The Time Trust is foundational to all relationships, and you can’t have trust without honesty. Sure, people tell little white lies occasionally. For example, they might make up an excuse to get out of a social obligation or bend the truth slightly to spare someone’s feelings. But when you discover that someone has been dishonest, it’s up to you to determine whether it’s justifiable or tolerable. Liars often evade the consequences of their actions and project an image of themselves that isn’t authentic. It can be disappointing to find out that someone isn’t who you thought they were, but you’re better off knowing exactly what you’re dealing with. You deserve someone who will share their true self with you, both good and bad.

Number 2 - They Periodically Ghost You Ghosting when you’re first getting to know someone can be hurtful, but when you’re in a committed relationship, it’s simply unacceptable. There’s really no justification for disappearing without explanation. Relationships require communication, and it’s unfair and unkind to vanish unexpectedly. If something happens and your partner needs some time to just be, they should let you know, at the very least. Ghosting is not only immature, but it’s inconsiderate and leaves the other person hurt and confused. A healthy relationship can’t exist where this type of behavior is tolerated.

Number 3 - They Subject You to Emotional Blackmail Another example of immaturity in a relationship is emotional blackmail. This is when your partner manipulates you into doing something they want by using your weaknesses, secrets, and vulnerabilities against you. Whether it’s making you feel guilty if you don’t do something for them or threatening to leave you altogether, this type of manipulation is unhealthy and intolerable. Ideally, you should be able to sit down together and have an open conversation. You may disagree, but you should be open to each other’s logical arguments and compromise for the sake of the relationship.

Number 4 - They Make You Feel Worthless This is actually a form of mental abuse and is typically hard to identify. It starts with small things like a hurtful comment or a dirty look, and it can quickly escalate from there. Your partner may make you believe that you’re unworthy of love and respect and that everyone else is better than you. By chipping away at your confidence, they gain more and more control over you. Mental abuse can take many forms including insults, comparisons to others, and derogatory comments. When you’re in a relationship with someone, you shouldn’t feel inadequate. Instead, you should both be lifting each other up to be better versions of yourselves. You deserve that much, and if you’re not getting it, that relationship isn’t serving you well.

Number 5 - They Subject You to Physical Violence Words and actions are two very different things. Someone can tell you they love you all day long, but if they are physically abusing you, those words are meaningless. You don’t intentionally hurt those you love, and physical violence is purely intentional. There’s nothing you can do or say that justifies any form of physical violence. Your partner may try to rationalize it by saying that you instigated it, but even if that were true, it’s up to them to be mature enough to let things cool down. If you’re subjected to physical abuse, you have to muster up the courage to leave no matter how hard it may be. Talk to someone you trust and get the help you need.

Number 6 - They Cheat On You Some unconventional relationships allow for multiple partners. But unless you and your partner had a conversation setting expectations regarding what is acceptable, most committed relationships assume monogamy. This means that cheating is not ok. A cheater might try to convince you that you are being overly sensitive or overreacting. They may even tell you that you need to get over yourself. But it’s perfectly valid to feel hurt and disrespected when it comes to infidelity.

If someone cheats on you and shows genuine remorse, it’s up to you to determine whether they deserve your forgiveness. But this type of betrayal is often hard to recover from because it always remains in the back of your mind. In fact, cheating is a real problem for some people. No matter how hard they try or how perfect their mate is, they’re unable to remain faithful. So you have to decide when enough is enough and walk away. There are plenty of fish in the sea, as they say. Don’t lower your standards. It’s not unreasonable to expect your partner to be faithful.

Number 7 - They Try to Control Everything About You Being in a relationship does not give one the right to dictate what the other person does. Sure, when you’re in a committed relationship, you’re naturally going to have opinions and preferences about each other whether it be the way you talk, dress, eat, or think. But, trying to control everything about someone is unhealthy. You should be free to be who you truly are and the person you’re with should accept that.

Number 8 - They Don’t Trust You A little bit of jealousy in a relationship is completely acceptable and healthy. Some people consider it a sign of love. But if your partner doesn’t trust you and constantly accuses you of cheating on them when you haven’t given them a reason to, then there’s something wrong. This inability to trust is often more a reflection of them, rather than you. It could stem from a deep insecurity or an unhealed wound from a previous relationship. Talk to them and make your intentions known as transparently as possible to clear up any uncertainties. And if they continue to accuse you of doing things you’re not doing, it’s probably best if they work on their issues on their own. The truth is that they won’t be able to be in a healthy relationship until they do that.

Number 9 - They Isolate You from Loved Ones Perhaps the worst thing that can happen when you’re involved with a controlling partner is being separated from your friends and family. This person will do this to you because the other people in your life are a threat to their ability to have full reign over you. You may find that you’re slowly being separated from your loved ones, and before you know it, you’re completely isolated. By removing your friends and family from your life, a controlling partner is able to have you all to themselves. So don’t let this happen.

Number 10 - They Are Threatened by Your Success In a healthy relationship, you want to see each other succeed. So you push each other to achieve more, and you celebrate the victories, big and small, together. When you do well at school, get a raise at work, or accomplish something great, you should be able to count on your partner to be happy for you and cheer you on. However, some people want to have the upper hand in the relationship and are threatened by their partner’s success.

They may try to minimize your achievements and be unsupportive when you need them. They may even try to sabotage you so that you can’t excel beyond them. But it’s important to remember that a healthy relationship isn’t a competition. It’s a partnership and a friendship where you’re there for each other. These are just some of the signs of an unhealthy relationship. And you shouldn’t have to tolerate such behaviors from the person who is supposed to love you. You have every right to walk away from a relationship in which you’re unhappy.

Trust your intuition, and don’t allow yourself to be forced into situations you don’t feel comfortable with. It’s better to be alone than stuck in a relationship that’s unhealthy. The only person you’re truly obligated to is yourself, so make sure that whoever you choose to be with has your best interest in mind and treats you the way you deserve to be treated. If you enjoyed this video, give it a thumbs-up, and share it with your friends, so we can keep making them.