The war within me

Tiny little piles of paperwork are scattered across various surfaces in the house. There is a looming pile of clean clothes on the recliner. The bedclothes are crumpled into a corner up by the pillows. Dishes are stacked haphazardly on top of each other in the sink.

If you took a quick glance around my spacious, vaulted ceiling studio apartment, you would not believe that a Virgo lived here. Until, that is, that you ventured to the closet, and saw that every single article of clothing was color-coded. Within that system, each color was grouped from sleeve length. The pants were organized from lightest to darkest. The shoes are lined up neatly.

The bathroom cabinets are organized, everything in a designated place. There are pretty, colorful boxes with make-up neatly organized inside them. Each box of make-up contains specific types: the foundations and concealers are in one box, the eye shadows and eyeliners in another, and so on.

It looks as though two different people live in this home; one is an organized neat freak and the other can't be bothered to fuss over untidiness. Those two people are just me.

Welcome to living inside my brain. I am a cusp sign. Specifically, I was born during the cusp of Beauty. If you don't know what a cusp is, it is the time period that happens three days prior and three days after the change of an astrological sign. It is said that people born on the cusp of signs tend to exhibit traits from both signs. In my case, I was born September 19th: the cusp of Virgo and Libra.

Virgos are known to be type-A personalities. They are fussy, nit-picky, logical, often shy people. They are very organized, natural leaders, are goal-oriented, and need to feel useful. Often pragmatic, Virgos tend to follow their head over their heart. They do tend to be over-critical, both internally and externally. I believe this is because they tend to see everyone's potential and want them to achieve it. Unfortunately, they often tend to judge harshly when they feel they or others aren't living up to what an individual is capable of. Virgos are mutable earth signs. They are grounded, focused, and patient, but serious.

Librans are basically the exact opposite of Virgos. They are very free-spirited and tend to walk a fine line when it comes to decisions. They are social butterflies, often are thought of as beauty queens, and typically follow their hearts over their heads. They are playful and good-natured but tend to sometimes get lost in the big picture. Where Virgos strive for perfection, Librans perpetually search for balance. Libra is a cardinal air sign. While cardinal signs are change initiators and also natural leaders, Libra's indecisiveness and free-spirited attitude appear to have them constantly moving and flitting about.

Virgo is ruled by Mercury (sharing a planet with Gemini, a sign infamous for duality). This planet governs communication, technology, and information. Librans are ruled by Venus, a planet that rules luxury, finances, love, and relationships.

I am in a constant state of fluctuation between my opposing forces. There has been an epic battle within me my whole life to find some sort of balance (much like a Libra) to my opposite sides. But as I have gotten older, I realize it is possible to find peace in a personality that constantly seems to oppose itself. The truth is, I can exist in both. Neither sign is mutually exclusive to the other. In fact, they both share many similar qualities.

Virgos and Librans both are lovers. Librans tend to play peace-maker, and both signs love to take care of people. They genuinely care about others. Both signs are very intelligent and both signs are thinkers and analyzers.

Over-all, I believe that I am definitely true to my sign. I am absolutely a Virgo and I embody many traits of a Libra. These two signs when brought together can be a really interesting mix, and at times contradictory, and I am here for confusing people!