How I Became a Bestselling Science Fiction Romance Author

I had this secret fantasy about my wife being abducted by a hot alien. I wanted to write a science fiction romance novel in which my wife would be the protagonist. That would feel like my fantasy became alive!

There was only one problem. I didn’t have time for writing because of my dull day job.

I had heard about this blogging site called Bleedium. I thought I could publish articles on that site to earn enough money to quit my job.

But writing non-fiction is not really my thing. So, I decided to find a freelancer on Dimerr to write articles for me. I found a professional writer who was willing to write five articles for five dollars. I hired him.

I started posting the articles to Bleedium. I also joined Lyric Media and NewsCake and copy-pasted the articles on those sites.

Some of my articles went viral, and I started to make some money. Within three months, I was earning enough to quit my job. Now I had time to write.

The Naked Abduction

I was ready to fulfill my dream of writing a science fiction romance novel for my wife. I logged in to my Dimerr account. A romance novel ghostwriter was willing to write an 80,000-word book for $100. I bargained and managed to lower the price to $80.

The novel was ready in a month. It was called The Naked Abduction.

Conveniently, the novel was finished for Christmas. My wife and I were sitting in front of the fireplace and opening Christmas presents. I was so excited when Sally unwrapped my gift. When she saw the book cover with an athletic blue-skinned hunk, she looked surprised. Pleasantly surprised, as I assumed.

“Well, umm. Thank you, Tom”, Sally said and gave me a quick kiss.

Sally seemed so pleased with my personal gift. I thought, why to stop with one novel. So, I hired the Dimerr writer to write a sequel. I gave the new book to Sally.

“You’ve written another one, huh?” She said.

I sure did. In total, the Dimerr writer wrote seven novels for me. The romance novel had become a series.

The Shocking News

Thanks to the novel series, I was hornier than ever. I constantly fantasized about the sex scenes in the books.

But Sally and I were having trouble in the bedroom. I thought the sexy novels would improve our sex life, but the opposite happened.

I even tried a little role play to spice things up. I dressed up in a tight green bodysuit. You know, like the ones gymnastics wear. I put an alien headband with antennas on my head. I waited in the bedroom for my wife to come home from work.

“Tom? What the hell are you wearing?” Sally said.

“You like it, honey? Wanna play alien abduction?”

“Tom. I’m too tired to fool around. I thought you were supposed to cook dinner tonight!”

On a sunny day in September, Sally told me the news out of the blue. According to her, we were not on the same page anymore. She was going to leave me for a cardiologist she had met at work.

That ungrateful bitch! I had written seven novels for my wife, and what did I get? A divorce.

My Ex-Wife Didn’t Deserve My Talent. My Readers Did.

For a while, I was lost. I had only one dream; writing a science fiction romance novel for my wife. Now that dream had lost its meaning.

Then it hit me. My ex-wife didn’t appreciate my books, but maybe other people would.

I started marketing my novels and self-published them one book at a time. The rest is history.

Now I’m a bestselling science fiction romance author, and you can thank my ex-wife for that. At the end of the day, my ex-wife didn’t deserve my talent. My readers did.

I’m already planning my next romance book series. But my ex-wife won’t be the protagonist anymore.

My bestseller books have earned me so much money that now I can afford to pay more for my Dimerr writer. I made a generous offer to pay him the $100 per book he originally asked for.

I’m indeed talented. It’s also true that I’m successful. But being horny is what got me this far.

More humor from me:

5 Insanely Productive Reasons to Stay up Until 5 am Every Night

How I Make 6 Figures Writing About Snails